


The Path Home

by dragonsav



Category: Mass Effect: Andromeda
Genre: 100 ways to disassociate - a novel by sara ryder, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Graphic Violence, It's slow burn i guess, Panic Attacks, Ryder is bad with emotions and doesnt deal with them unless they ABSOLUTELY MUST, Slow Burn, and some uncanon things, as if i needed more, basically my playthrough of MEA but with more Feelings, im not gonna spend a lot of time describing combat or stuff like that, slow burn?, will only focus on key points most likely
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-21
Updated: 2017-07-04
Packaged: 2018-10-12 15:50:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 18
Words: 47,066
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10494246
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dragonsav/pseuds/dragonsav
Summary: Sara Ryder, Pathfinder for Ark Hyperion, AKA, Certified Human Disaster.In a journey through an unknown galaxy that seems to be more trouble than it's worth, an angry, tired, explorer named Sara Ryder must figure out some way to make inhospitable planets viable for life. Adventures included, but are not limited to, fighting off an alien race that wants to turn everyone into them, discovering a new peaceful race of alien, unintentionally flirting with one said alien, and finding out why her father was so damn secretive.(NOTE: I have gone through and edited the current chapters, and added in some missing details so please re read before reading the new chapters as of 7/4! thanks!)





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> this is a self indulgence fic that I am making to get on a better schedule of writing, my goal is to push out at least one chapter a day, since I have nothing to do right now. but I really just wanted to write something for MEA sorry if its a mess. I am using the default name for female ryder because I feel like it flows better? the description I use for her is the ryder I made in my playthrough, white hair, green eyes and such, but feel free to imagine her anyway you'd like
> 
> I have a writing blog! vakarianswrites on tumblr, where I have posted this as well, so check it out there too!

_The breeze that blew down from the mountains sent shivers down her spine, Sara could tell by the clouds that the coming rain would be cold, maybe it would snow._  
   
_Unlikely, but still. She hoped. It would be nice to see something she saw very rarely before she left for good. Scott was supposed to meet her here. she had arrived early than the scheduled time. She needed a moment alone, even if it was just for a little while. since dad's discharge from the Alliance... and mom's death... she needed to clear her head._  
   
_She thought she had found her calling, researching the ancient Protheans. never thought she would leave it, what could possibly tear her from the one thing she loved? but then her father was dishonorably discharged, and her mothers sickness got worse. the reputation she built, a reliable researcher, an exemplary scientist, none of it seemed to matter when her last name was Ryder. she was removed from her research team, and practically grounded. she returned to earth, but it didn't take long for her to get agitated. maybe it was reckless, but she was able to join an alliance peacekeeping unit. it was temporary, but it lasted until now. today was her last day, she left with few friends and no emotional ties. she was going to leave earth with nothing left behind her._  
   
_Sara stared out at the rolling valley below her family's cabin, it was in the middle of a forest, at the base of a large mountain. It was one of her favorite places. She had many fond memories together, and she wanted to spend her last day in this galaxy here. Alec was going to arrive maybe an hour after Scott, he supposedly had something important to tell them. The familiar rumble of a motorcycle driving up the path signaled her brothers arrival. Sara walked into veiw of the driveway, he was early too. She smiled, waving as he drove to a stop, parking his bike next to hers. Her white hair whipped around her in the sudden gust of wind that blew past them, the clouds beginning to move in and the sky growing darker. Scott pulled his helmet off, his short hair mussed by the helmet._    
   
_"Nice helmet hair."_    
   
_Scott scowled, ruffling it even worse by running his hand through it. "no matter what I do it always does this!" Sara snorted, rolling her eyes. "Don't worry, one day you'll learn proper hair care." Scott stuck his tongue out at her, getting off his bike and walking to the house. "Whatever, your hair is always so perfect..." Sara snickered, walking beside him._  
   
_"you're early."_    
   
_Scott shrugged. "So are you. Heard anything from dad?"_    
   
_Sara shook her head, sighing softly as she grabbed the spare key from the lamp outside. "Nope. Wasn't really expecting one. He'll be here though, never misses something he thinks is important." Scott nodded in agreement as she unlocked the door.  "Unlike graduation day."_    
                         _Sara scoffed softly, shrugging her shoulders and flicking the switch as she walked into the house. The smell of cedar wood and cinnamon greeted her, a smile coming to her face. It looked like it had when she left. Scott sighed and marched over to the couch, flopping onto it with a pleased smile, tossing his bag onto the floor. "God I missed this place…"_    
   
_Sara smiled, walking around the living room, to the bay window overlooking the valley. Her smiled faded a little, a small pot of flowers sat on the sil, still growing. Someone obviously came by regularly. They were mom and dads favorite flowers, stargazer lillies. Sara set her bag down gently, slowly sitting on the floor. Reaching out a hand to gingerly touch the petals._    
   
_Scott picked his head up from the couch, peering over at his sister. He felt a painful pang in his heart, his face contorting into an expression on sadness. He cried more than sara did when their mother died, but Sara was never that open. It hit her just as hard, but she stayed stoic for him._    
   
_"Hey…"_  
   
_Sara looked up, glancing at Scott. "Yeah, I know. I'm alright."  she stood up and sighed, placing her hands on her hips. "You know… we'll never see earth again."_  
                _her brother nodded, resting his chin on the edge of the couch. "Yeah. I know… but what is there here for us anyways? We'll never work in the Alliance again… I doubt mercenary work would suit us."  She shook her head, turning away from the window and going to sit beside her brother.  "nah. I'm a terrible shot… how did Micca take the news?"_    
   
_Scott rolled his eyes, sighing heavily. "About as well as you'd expect…" Sara looked at him expectantly, the silence urging him to continue. Her brother shrugged, picking at the skin around his nails, a nervous habit. "He… wasn't as understanding as id hoped. I'd been meaning to break it off, Andromeda just gave me a better excuse." Scott shook his head, sighing sadly. Sara set her hand on his shoulder. "He was always a bastard, Scott. Never treated you right." her brother nodded, leaning on his sisters shoulder. "Yeah. On the bright side, I'll never see him again." he laughed softly at that, but his smile didn't reach his eyes. He glanced up at her, poking her stomach. "What about you? No scandalous fling you want to tell me about? Ooh, what about that turian bodyguard that protected you guys on Eden Prime? He was cute yeah?"_  
                      _Sara rolled her eyes, a grin creeping onto her face. "cute, but sadly not worth the effort. I never date someone who can't hold their liquor. Two drinks in and he's plastered." Scott snorted out a laugh, shaking his head. "Alright, alright, what about that quarian you hang out with?"  Sara shook her head, scrunching up her nose._  
         _"nah, Rali is just a friend. She's engaged, her and her fiancé are going to be on the quarian ark." Scott raised his eyebrows, nudging her elbow. "Oh yeah? Well at least you'll have a friend in the new galaxy."_    
        _Sara nodded, staring at the ceiling. "Yeah, I'm not going to Andromeda to find 'true love'" she made air quotations with her fingers. "Although I wouldn't be surprised if I had to go 600 years to find the one person that can handle all this."_    
   
_Sara gestured at herself, waggling her eyebrows suggestively.  Scott chuckled, shrugging his shoulders as he relaxed. "Yeah, you're probably right..." He wrapped an arm around her shoulders, holding a hand out in front of him as if presenting a masterpiece. "Just imagine it, though. New planets, new stars... hell, maybe even new people. All of it just... waiting. It's gonna be grand, sis! And we'll both be there, experiencing it together!"  Sara laughed, holding onto her brothers arm. "That’s right. I wouldn't do this without you Scott, never."_  
          
_"I promise."_    
   
   
Sara held her brothers hand, she didn’t know if he could hear her, or even knew if she was there. Tears threatened to break through, past the wall she had built since she returned from Habitat 7.    
   "I promised, Scott." She said, her voice barely a whisper, raw and unrestrained. "I promised I wouldn't do this without you dammit... so you'd better wake up," she choked, suffocating the sob that threatened to break her resolve. " _You hear me?_ Wake up Scott... please wake up..."    
   
Laying her head on the cold metal, squeezing her eyes shut and finally letting herself let go. Tears spilling freely down her cheeks.    
        A gentle hand on her shoulder tore her from her thoughts, she jerked up, quickly wiping her eyes. Harry looked down at her, smiling sadly. "it's getting late, Sara. You should get some sleep."   Sara nodded, quietly wiping away her tears. "thanks, harry..." Her voice was hoarse and she was silent as she stood, reluctantly letting her brothers hand go. "let me know if anything changes?"     
Harry nodded, patting her shoulder. "You'll be the first to know." She nodded numbly, tearing her eyes away from her brother. It would do no good to dwell on what could happen, she needed to move on.    
   
By the time Scott woke up, she would find them a home. She promised him, and she would not let that promise be broken.  


	2. Waking up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ark Hyperion arrives in Andromeda and Sara wakes up, but something isn't quite right...

Sleeping for 600 years in an upright position was NOT good for posture. 

Sara Ryder was greeted with bright lights, a throbbing headache, and a kink in her back. Did everyone who went through cryostasis feel like this after waking up? She sat up with a short gasp, her joints popping as she did, blinking several times as her eyes adjusted to the light. She looked around, eyes widening as she breathed out, "we made it..." She moved to stand but was stopped by a technician.

"deep breaths, you're gonna want to take it easy." Sara scrunched up her nose, looking up at the doctor. She just had the longest nap in history of naps and they were telling her to what? "I've been taking it easy for 600 years..." she spoke, although the didn't try to stand again. Another technician came up beside the other, reading aloud from a datapad. 

"Ryder, Sara. Recon specialist, Pathfinder Mission Team." 

The first techie nodded, checking her vitals at the terminal. "Pathfinder team, eh? The ones finding us a home." the second one looked at her, smiling. "Can you make it somewhere tropical, nice warm ocean... summer year-round?"  
technician number one chuckled, moving to help Sara stand. "how about we get her a cup of coffee first?" 

The technician, Trevor he said his name was, helped her walk for a few steps before leading her to the central area of the cryo bay where her promptly sat her down, handed her a cup of lukewarm coffee, and told her to sit tight. She waited in relative silence, listening to the drone of the greeting video play on the large screen to the right of her. An Asari walked over to her, smiling warmly. "Sara Ryder? Let's get you checked out." 

Sara sat through the typical checkup, standard tests to ensure brain function, that sort of thing. All the while the greeting video playing cheerfully about the wonders of the Heleus cluster. The doctor, her name tag read Lexi, glanced over at the screen on the wall. "Makes it sound so easy doesn’t it?" Sara shrugged, swishing the contents of her mug around. "everything sounds easy in the movies, it hardly ever pans out like that though. We'll be ready if it's not." Lexi nodded, inputting results into her data pad. "I hope so." Sara glanced up at her quizzically. "You know something?" Lexi continued with the exam as she spoke. "Word came down, the pathfinder wants you all mission ready within the hour." 

Right, the pathfinder... her father. 

Lexi held two fingers off to the left. "Look this way." she slowly brought them across her chest to the right. Sara followed the instructions, curiosity bubbling in her chest. "Why the rush?" Lexi shook her head, tapping away on her datapad. "He didn't say. But something's up." she circled around to the terminal on Sara's right.  
"Everything checks out, just one more thing before we can send you on your way." Sara glanced across the aisle, someone from across the aisle waved at her. He looked kinda familiar.. Lexi caught her attention again as she spoke. "Let's test your SAM implant. SAM, are you monitoring?" 

There was a brief silence before Lexi spoke again. "SAM, are you online?" 

A voice Sara was very familiar with spoke up, the AI cores hologram popping up behind her. "Yes, Dr. T'Perro. Good morning, Sara, are you feeling well?" Sara glanced behind her, smiling slightly, her head still hurt a little. "little bit of a headache to be honest." SAM spoke again, his voice monotone. 

"Readings confirmed, your biotic abilities have built up inside your system, causing discomfort. Creating a small kinetic barrier should diffuse the pressure." 

Lexi glanced back at her, then to the charts on the terminal, nodding slightly. "yes, that would be best. Start easy though, your implant could be unstable." Sara nodded, holding her hands palms up on her lap. Tapping into her biotics was always a strange feeling to her, but it came as naturally as breathing once she started. A familiar chill ran over her skin as the barrier washed over her, a soft purple sheen discoloring the fabric of her clothes. The throbbing in her head ceased and she sighed, nodding. 

"yup, that did it." 

Lexi nodded, closing the files on the terminal. "your implants are stable once again. You're all done. Though you may want to stick around while we revive your brother. It always helps to see a familiar fa-" 

A loud rumbling cut Lexi off, the floor beneath them trembling slightly. Sara frowned, were they in the Milky Way, she would suspect pirates. But a whole new galaxy brought a whole new set of issues. She had no idea what it could be, and that made her jumpy. "I.. Don’t like the sound of that." 

The ship lurched to the side, the lights flickering and the metal beneath them groaning in effort. Sara fell backwards, her body colliding with the floor. Sara barely stood up before the ship lurched again, sending stasis pods flying towards her and Lexi. The stasis pod suddenly flew upwards, and Sara found herself gripping at the floor, her mind kicking into overdrive. If the gravity was offline, something tripped the generators. Sara was at a loss for what could have caused it, and that made her wary. 

"What's happening?" Lexi said, somehow calm even as she stayed suspended in the air. Sara shook her head, waving her arms in an attempt to steady herself. Sara struggled to right herself, the weightless feeling making her stomach flip. "Just—hang on!" Captain Dunn's voice echoed over the loudspeakers. "Engineering, report!" 

"Gravity in cryo bay is offline!" another voice sounded off, but not over the loudspeaker, this one Sara recognized. "I'm almost inside! Hold on!" the doors opened and Cora grabbed onto the terminal by the door. "This is Cora! I'm in the cryo bay, brace for a reset!" 

Sara slammed into the ground as the artificial gravity came back online, her palms stinging as she caught herself on the hard floor. Cora staggered a bit, turning at looking over the chaos. "Is everyone alright?" Sara got to her feet, brushing herself off and helping the doctor beside her up. "What just happened?"  
Cora walked over, shaking her head. "We're not sure… sensors are scrambled." She smiled, placing a hand on her hip.  
"but it's good to see you're up, feels like centuries since we spoke." 

Before Sara could speak, another voice sounded over the loud speakers, a voice Sara once again recognized.

"This is the Pathfinder. Mission teams, continue preparations Cora, Ryders, report to the bridge." Sara pressed her lips into a thin line, shaking her head. "He sounds worried." Cora nodded in agreement. "He does. Where is--" a technician called out to doctor Lexi, interrupting the conversation. "We have a problem, its Scott Ryder." Sara felt her pulse jump, her eyes widening. He wasn't awake yet. She whispered under her breath, practically running to the pod. "Please… please… no…" Lexi rushed over, with Sara and Cora close behind. Lexi grabbed the datapad from the technician, her sharp eyes darting over the scans. Sara worriedly peeked at the screen, but couldn't quite get a read. Her fingers fumbled at the end of her braided hair, her nerves hitting her hard. "Is Scott alright?" Lexi looked up at her, patting her shoulder gently. "your brother is fine. His vitals are strong but the revival procedure was interrupted." Sara glanced back at the pod, small sparks of energy dancing across the metal. "I.…I can't lose him." 

Lexi pulled her away from the pod, a hand set gently on her shoulders. "Don't worry-- it just means the process could take a bit longer than usual. SAM?" the doctor hopefully turned to the AI, hoping he could set Sara at ease. SAM spoke through the doctors omni-tool, showing Scott's vitals signs; healthy and alive. "My connection to Scott's implant was suspended. however his pulse, respiration, and brain activity are all normal." Lexi smiled slightly, turning back to Sara. "to be on the safe side, we'll need to keep him in a low level coma for a while, then let his body regain consciousness naturally." Lexi closed her omni-tool, reinforcing her initial prognosis. "He'll be fine." 

Sara nodded slightly, glancing back at the pod. "Glad to hear it.." Cora came up beside her, smiling despite the panic that Sara felt creeping up her spine. "Thanks Lexi, keep us updated? We should get to the bridge." Sara nodded, regaining her composure. She did still have a job to do, and her father never liked to wait on people. 

"Right. We should do that before he gets impatient."


	3. Habitat 7

Sara was right, her father was worried. 

After fixing the generators and making her way to the bridge, she saw just what knocked the Hyperion off course. It was some kind of dark energy, according to SAM's analysis, and it interfered with technology to the point of atotal shutdown. 

She stood silently, her hands behind her back as her father argued with the captain. He wanted to follow protocol; in the event that contact between the Hyperion, the other Arks, and the nexus is cut off, they proceed to the Arks designated 'golden world'. Captain Dunn was more concerned about the ship; stopping the outages and ensuring the safety of everyone on board. 

"can you blame her?" Cora whispered, leaning closer to Sara so she wouldn’t have to talk as loud. Sara glanced at Cora, then back to her father. No, Sara couldn't blame her. 20,000 people who depended on her to see them safely across dark space? A big responsibility. "It is her ship, I'd think she'd get the last word…"  
Cora scrunched up her nose, tilting her head to the side as she spoke.  
"Well, he might--" Alec turned to look at the two of them, his voice sharp and gaze even sharper. "This isn't about having the last word." Cora straightened under his gaze, resuming her professional stature. "Yes sir." 

Sara glanced at her father, his gaze shifting to her and lingering before he turned back to Captain Dunn. One of the pilots called out to them, the energy cloud thinning as they came around it. 

"We're coming through!" 

Sara's eyes widened as she stared at the image in front of her, behind the energy cloud was the human golden world, if they could even call it that anymore; Habitat 7. dread slowly seeped into her bones the longer she stared, she hated all the unknowns this trip was bringing, but then again that’s why she came. Exploration and such; at least, that’s what Scott would have said. Her stomach twisted as she thought of her brother… they needed to fix this, for Scott, for everyone on the Hyperion, hell, maybe even for their future… if there was one to be had in Andromeda, Habitat 7 was their start. 

Captain Dunn shook her head, taking a few steps forward. "My god… is that our golden world?"  
Alec steeled his gaze, though it didn't look much different from the eternal scowl he always seemed to have. "Habitat 7, 'New Earth', if we're lucky." from the tone of his voice, Sara didn't think so. She stepped forward, her father turning and walking towards the SAM router that doubled as the galaxy map. 

"All of our long range scans said it was in the green zone, perfect for human settlement." Cora joined Alec at the map, examining the scan of the planet he brought up. Sara stood still, her brow furrowing as she stared up at the planet. Cora shook her head, saying with a frustrated sigh. "It doesn't even look the same." 

Sara folded her arms, her expression beginning to mimic her fathers. "We don't know how bad it is. We didn't travel this far to give up because it looks different. It has been 600 years," she put emphasis on the has part of her sentence. "it's still our best shot." 

Captain Dunn nodded slowly, glancing at Sara and then back to the planet. "Maybe. There's just a lot on the line…" 

Alec turned to the SAM console. "SAM?" 

The AI responded, sounding almost concerned. "energy from the phenomenon, is dampening our sensors. Planetary conditions are unknown." 

 

After all the time Sara had spent with him, she still had no idea how SAM worked… another thing to figure out she mused. How could an artificial intelligence sound worried? Sara shook her head, chewing on the inside of her cheek, things were really not panning out like they planned. She looked back at her father, trying to gauge what he was thinking. Alec sighed, folding his arms. 

"We're marooned. Twenty-thousand souls adrift at sea. When the power runs out and stays out," he pointed at the scan of habitat 7. "We need to know if that's safe harbor." Captain Dunn stared at him pointedly, her hands on her hips. "and if it's not?" 

Alec turned, his back to the bay windows as he moved. "As Pathfinder it'll be my job to find an alternative. It's what we trained for. But if it is…" he glanced back to the planet, something Sara couldn't quite place crossing his features. "We're already home." 

Captain Dunn sighed, defeated. "Alright. But make it quick." Alec nodded, marching up the short steps to the platform, addressing Cora with his 'N7 voice', Sara had come to call it. When he was trying to be assertive instead of smug. "Harper, the rest of the team should be awake by now, have them spin up two shuttles, planetfall in thirty." 

Cora nodded curtly, replying with a brief "yessir" before following him away from the bridge. Sara remained, her green eyes lingering on the scan of the planet, trying to leech anything she could from the data shown. Captain Dunn shook her head, setting her hands on the railing. "A stubborn one, isn't he?" 

Sara snorted, glancing at the captain. "that’s an understatement. No one said Dad was a diplomat."  
Captain Dunn looked at her, breathing out a short, almost irritated sigh. "Just as long as he knows what he's doing. Its not like the calvary's coming to save the day." 

Sara nodded, the reality of the situation sinking in as she turned and headed for the armory. Her stomach twisted as she left, something told her this wouldn't end well… 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It didn’t take Sara long to find her armor, she was one of the few resident biotics on board, aside from Cora. Before her father was discharged from the alliance, she had her own armor custom made. Unlike other armors she didn’t need a second person to help put it on, and handled a biotic barrier better than most other armors. It was originally her mothers armor, but modified to suit her biotic abilities, with a sleek black and red design that matched her fathers N7 armor. She sighed as she adjusted the plating on her arm, she had never really done any fighting without Scott, he was the fighter she was… well she just wasn't. she signed onto Andromeda as a field analyst for the Pathfinder team, she would be on the front lines of scientific research, not fighting. 

"My brothers going to hate that he missed this.." 

Cora chuckled from where she stood in front of her locker, adjusting the straps on her boots. "are all the Ryders adrenaline junkies?"  
Sara shook her head with a short snicker. "what can I say? Its in our blood. I was born a minute ahead of him," She smiled as she stared off at the armory doors. "I never let him forget it…" Cora glanced at her, coming up to pat her shoulder. "Scott will pull through." Sara nodded, dragging herself out of her worries.  
"yeah, and when he does, he'll wanna hear stories." Cora grinned, nodding. "That’s the spirit. Lets go out and find him some." She walked towards the door as Sara grabbed her helmet. "Maybe stop by the good luck rock before we go." Sara scrunched up her nose, lifting a brow. "The what?" 

Cora shook her head, laughing softly. "An old superstition of your dads." SAM spoke up through the commlink, his sudden appearance startling Sara, making her almost drop her helmet. 

"I apologize if I startled you Sara, the Pathfinder is now requiring sidearm's, I've opened the armaments locker." 

Sara sighed, she still needed to get used to the voice in her head. "No problem SAM, are we expecting trouble?" the AI responded as Sara and Cora made their way to the weapon loadout. "A precaution. Please, arm yourself." Sara was pleased to see her old sniper rifle secured in the case, her first weapon. She grabbed it gently, smiling as she traced all the nicks and scratches. "I can't believe he actually remembered…" Cora glanced over at the gun, frowning slightly. "that’s yours? Its an N7 model, I always thought it was a memento of your dads."  
Sara shook her head, grabbing her tempest pistol that was secured under it. "it’s a hand-me-down. First gun my dad taught me to use. Once I was old enough to keep up with it properly he gave it to me." Cora nodded, her gaze lingering on the black metal as she strapped her pistols to her hip holsters.  
"Aren't you a biotic though? I've never known any biotics that use sniper rifles." Sara holstered the rifle across the small of her back, strapping her own pistol to her right hip. "I showed proficiency in both. My mom studied element zero when she was pregnant with me and Scott, the exposure gave us an apt for biotics, and also gave us this." she gestured to her white hair, re-braiding it into a tighter braid before pulling up the collar on her suit. "my mom died because of it, but luckily the illness she had didn't transfer." Sara hadn't talked about her mom for a while, but she had processed it long before she came to Andromeda. Cora nodded, glancing at her face to gauge her reaction, Alec never talked about Ellen. 

"Your dad doesn’t like talking about her." Sara shook her head, making sure her weapons were secure before moving towards the doors to the hangar. "he… couldn't save her. He made SAM trying, and in the end she still died… Scott and I accepted it a long time before dad did… sometimes I don’t know if he really has." she shook her head, sighing.  
"It's not a subject we talk about a lot. We Ryders hate dealing with emotions." Cora snorted softly, shrugging her shoulders as she joined Sara. "I hear that. Hey before we go, I wanted to give you this." Cora handed her a thin, metal rectangle, about the length of her palm. Sara frowned, examining it. "What is it?"  
Cora pulled a similar rectangle from her belt, hers was more of a sheer purple, while the one she handed Sara was more blue. "I meant to give it to you before we left but I was a bit busier than I was expecting." she wrapped her hand around the rectangle and activated her biotics, the metal conformed to her palm and a blade extended from seemingly nothing. Sara stared, wide eyed at it. 

"Woah, that’s so cool! It's like a sword or something." Cora nodded, her biotics dying down and the blade sheathing into the little metal rectangle. 

"It's an Asari Sword. Only useful to those with biotics, your father mentioned that your biotics had gotten stronger and your amp wasn't syncing with your new implant properly, so I thought I'd give you one of these. Just hold it in your palm and activate your biotics and bam. Melee weapon ready for use."  
Sara looked puzzled for a moment, just how much did she know? And dad talked about her during pathfinder training? Sara shook off her confusion, her smile grateful.  
"thanks, Cora. Hopefully I won’t need to use it on this mission." Cora nodded, opening the armory doors to the hangar. "I second that." They made their way to the shuttle, meeting up with the rest of the Pathfinder team. Alec stepped out of the shuttle as they came into view, addressing them all as a team. "All right team, button it up, we leave in five." Cora glanced at the rest of the team, Harry getting the medical supplies, Kirkland and Greer loading up spare ammo. 

"Sir, we broke out the weapons as you requested. Anything we should know about?" Alec gave a half nod. "Seemed prudent, given the situation. We'll be down a man with Scott out." Sara fought the scowl that threatened to creep onto her face, glancing at the ground. Down another fighter, he meant. Alec was always disappointed that Sara didn't take to combat as Scott did, flowers and bugs interesting her more than guns and bullets. Alec moved and set his hand on her shoulder, grabbing her attention. His voice was lower, gentler even. " I heard what happened," the moment seemed awkward to Sara, her father was never gentle or understanding, at least not that she could really remember. "Your brother's strong, he'll make it."  
Sara nodded, meeting her fathers gaze. "Scott wouldn't want… us to worry because of him." she hesitated on the word us, Dad never worried about them before, why start now? Alec didn't seem to notice, or if he did he didn't let on. He nodded, patting her shoulder.

"You're right. The mission comes first… though," he let his hand fall from her shoulder, sighing softly. "I doubt your mother would have seen it that way." he glanced down at the ground, and then back to Sara's face. Sara kept her face carefully blank, he hadn't talked about mom in forever. "I promised her I'd get you two here safely."  
He turned from her then, stepping onto the shuttle as he addressed the team. 

Sara didn't catch his pep talk, she was more shocked that her father showed emotion. her memory was still a little foggy, a side effect from the cryostasis, but she did remember the years that led up to Andromeda. Her mothers passing, her family's fracture… she fought Alec, angry at him for focusing more on SAM when he should have been there for Scott… for her. She had recklessly joined a peacekeeping force for the alliance after a particularly big fight, she had left the house with a slammed door and didn't look back until Alec contacted her about the Andromeda Initiative. She half hoped she would die keeping pirates off of human colonies but no such luck.  
He apologized, somewhat, for his actions. But Sara was still upset, how could she excuse the years of distancing himself from them, when they needed him he wasn't there. 

A light tap on her shoulder brought her back to reality, just barely catching the last bit of her dads speech. Cora had set her hand on her shoulder, looking up at her dad like he was some sort of icon. _Technically speaking, he is_ , Sara thought bitterly. 

"…So, lets go make history."


	4. Planetside

Sara boarded the second shuttle, with Kirkland, Greer, and that guy from the cryo bay, Liam. She recalled speaking to him before she left the milky way, but that was it. The shuttles fired to life, rumbling as they hovered to take off. Sara heard her dad speak over the comms.

_"[Ark Hyperion, this is shuttle one, switching to manual guidance.]"_

Sara head Kirkland reply, his voice more prominent than her fathers. 

"Shuttle Two, taking your lead." 

Captain Dunn's voice rang out over the comms, the stress in her voice made it very clear to Sara just how much was riding on them. _"[Good luck, Pathfinder Team.]"_

The shuttle quivered as it passed by the cloud, turbulence caused by the dark energy. The shuttle rumbled softly as it took off from the Ark, she saw the dark energy cloud up close, and it was… beautiful. 

In a destroy-everything kindof way. 

It stared back at her from the blank canvas of the stars, curling and twisting like deadly vines. As the shuttle moved, it seemed to follow it, wisps of the energy reaching out like fingers to grab them. It was beautiful, but all Sara could see was destruction… if they hadn't run into it, Scott would be with her. She shook her head, tearing her eyes from the phenomenon. She couldn't think of Scott, she needed to stay focused on the mission. As much as she hated to say it, her dad was right; the mission comes first. 

"turning to vector one-three-five." 

"copy that. We're on point." 

Liam stood adjacent to her, staring out the window. "Wow… would you look at that." Sara nodded slowly, the Ark was suspended in space, the dark energy bending around and over it, acting like a deadly decoration for the starry background. Sara steeled her voice, glaring at the dark energy.  
"whatever it is, it stopped the Hyperion in it's tracks." 

SAM chimed in, speaking matter-of-factly. "It appears to be a mass of unstable energy." 

Liam shrugged, glancing back to Sara. "If you say so." 

Her father spoke over the comms, his voice stern. _"[steer clear of it.]"_

Fisher, the second pilot for their shuttle, spoke as the turbulence worsened. If Sara hadn’t been buckled in, she would've been flung out of her seat. 

"I'm getting some chop here." SAM helpfully added, "Gravity anomalies detected." 

Kirkland steadied the second shuttle as best he could. "I'll see if I can even it out"  
Greer sat beside Sara, sounding uncomfortable as he spoke. "My stomach would appreciate that." 

The shuttle passed the larger mass of the phenomenon, the turbulence ceasing as they cleared. Kirkland sounded smug as he spoke, the shuttle speeding up. "We're good, accelerating to cruising speed." 

Liam turned to Sara, one arm leaned against the shuttle frame. "Ryder, we didn't get a chance to meet back in the milky way. Name's Liam Kosta, security and response specialist."  
Sara nodded. "Good to meet you, Liam." 

Liam looked back out the window, the planet slowly coming into view. "Hard to believe we're finally doing this." Sara nodded again, folding her arms.  
"It sure beats reading the brochures." Sara turned her attention back to the Planet outside, it looked… unhealthy. Fisher spoke up, shifting in his seat, the shuttles veering to the left as they descended to Habitat 7.

"Beginning deceleration, planet's dead ahead." 

Sara felt the familiar flip of her gut, like teetering on the drop of a rollercoaster. The image of the planet obscured by blinding light for a brief second. The shuttle jerked again, and Sara felt sick. Space travel was amazing, but she really hated the first moments of landing. Fisher sounded off, his voice slightly panicky. 

"The flight guidance is scrambled, the controls are fighting me!" 

Kirkland tried to ease their own shuttles descent, with little success. "It'll pass!" the shuttle's flight pattern evened out, and Kirkland sighed. "We're through." 

More of the planet was visible now, and it looked… Sara couldn't describe it.  
Liam breathed out something, but Sara didn't catch it, she was engulfed in worry. She couldn't tell much from what she could see, but it was not a sunny day. Cora spoke over the comms, sounding equally concerned. _"[Shuttle two, are you seeing this?]"_

Sara spoke, standing to get a better view of the ground. "Copy that, doesn't look like a golden world from here."  
Kirkland spoke up, his voice speaking like a warning. "Ionization levels are rising…"  
Alec spoke over them, his voice remaining calm and stern. _"[Stay on course to the landing zone.]"_

"Oxygen levels are below minimum human requirements." SAM said, it didn't help to ease Sara's worry. 

Fisher sounded sick as he talked, shaking his head. "Is this even the right planet? Thought we had this all worked out…" Alec cracked down on the chatter, all the talk probably wasn't helping anyway. 

_"[keep it tight, shuttle two.]"_

Liam snorted, folding his arms. "Uh, the mountains are floating…" Sara glanced at the suspended rocks, shaking her head. "What the fuck… holy-- look over there, portside!" Liam and Greer leaned over, looking out the side windows. The tall, black looking pillars protruded through the rocks; no way they were natural. Cora spoke over the comms, sounding bewildered.  
_"[That's has got to be advanced engineering.]"_

Alec relayed to the Hyperion, they needed to stay in constant contact should something go wrong. "[Hyperion, this is the Pathfinder. We've got evidence of an alien civilization.]" Sara's first concern was their cover, if these weren't friendly they could be shot down. "Have we been seen?" Liam turned to her, speaking more to her than over thee comms. "What if they're not friendly?" Alec addressed his concern, it was something they all needed to hear. 

_"[We stick to first contact protocol. No deadly force unless hostile intent is clear.]"_

The shuttle jerked and groaned, the controls overloading; Kirkland yelling out. "Shit! Ionizations spiked-- Lightning strike!" the shuttle spun, throwing Sara into Liam, flinging both of them into the wall. The shuttle jerked again and Sara barely heard Fisher as the shuttle door blew open, Liam would have been thrown out if Sara hadn't grabbed his hand. "Shitshitshit!!-- Hold on, Liam!" 

Liam's grip slipped, it was just Sara keeping him there. "Ryder!!" 

It was shit luck that the shuttle was struck again, The shuttle jerking violently and catching fire. It all happened so fast, Sara barely registered being flung from the shuttle. She shrieked as she fell, rocks and debris flying past her. 

SAM spoke over the noise. "Acceleration increasing." Sara felt a pang of irritation. "No fucking shit SAM!" 

"your jump-jet is malfunctioning." "Get it working!" 

"Approaching terminal velocity." 

Sara cursed, quickly throwing out a biotic field, just before she hit the ground. It halted the initial impact, but she still hit the ground hard. The sound of glass cracking was fear inducing, her brain spiraling into emergency mode as she quickly pulled out her omni-tool, repairing the small crack in her helmet. 

She took a gasping breath, too shook to attempt to stand up just yet. What… what just happened? She slowly sat up, panic slowly setting in, but she didn't let it stay. She assumed by the silence, that the rest of the team was dead, or the comms were offline. With no input from SAM, she decided that the comms were just down. She didn’t want to dwell on the other option. She stood, staggering, adrenaline pulsing through her. "Liam..?" 

She called out, was he still alive? It had to be a fluke that her jump-jet malfunctioned, she would have to rely on her biotics if she needed to jump… she stumbled over, calling out again, louder. "Liam!!" 

A noise from her right caught her attention, she instinctively drew her pistol, keeping the nose down, but still drawn. "Whoa, hey, its just me!" initiative blue brought a wave of relief and she holstered her gun. "Holy shit," she breathed out, her nerves settling. "okay… are you alright?" Liam nodded, brushing his palms off on his pants. 

"Yeah, im good. Comms are down though… we should try to see if anyone else made it." Sara nodded, breathing heavily. "Yeah… and safety tip? Don't breath the air."   
Liam chuckled, beginning to trek up the path on their left. "You learn that the hard way?" Sara snorted, nodding as she walked beside him, keeping a hand on her pistol and an eye out for any good sniping positions in case combat was required. It was out of habit mostly, she followed in her fathers footsteps as far as the alliance went, enlisting in the alliance at 18, and eventually becoming an N7, one of the youngest in her division. she wasn't as renowned for it, specializing in subterfuge and tactics rather than brute force and combat, the only time she felt her father was proud of her really... She was a part of a unit that protected scientists on dangerous missions in the outskirts of the milky way.  
She was content to be silent, its what her training taught her. Apparently Liam didn't like the quiet. "How's your survival training?" 

Sara glanced at him, before continuing to scope out the area as they walked, her eyes calculating. "I trained in an N7 unit that specialized in covert tactics and reconnaissance. I know how to keep myself alive, if that’s what you meant." Liam made a thoughtful noise, slowing his pace. "Are all the Ryders N7's?" Sara snorted, smiling tightly, keeping her voice low. "Well, my mother was a scientist. So, no. not all of us. My dad strongly encouraged Scott and I to follow in his footsteps, and we did. Although it would have taken us longer to earn it if my dad hadn't taught us some of his tricks." 

Liam nodded, glancing at her. "Why are you whispering?" Sara rolled her eyes, glancing at him. "if there are aliens here, and they aren't friendly, do you really want them to hear us?" Liam shrugged, nodding slowly. "Yeah, you've got a point." Sara let the conversation drop, following the wreckage from their shuttle.  
Liam saw something and jogged ahead, kneeling beside their trashed comm system. Sara joined him, sighing softly and shaking her head as she scanned it over. "no fixing this. Looks like it broke on impact."  
Liam nodded. "Explains why we've got no SAM connection." 

They moved on, Liam insisting on carrying a conversation; Sara supposed it was better than panicking, and It did keep her grounded… sortof. 

"These plants kinda look like tentacles." 

Sara glanced at the yellow glowy plants, scrunching her nose. "Hm. Lets not mess with them." Liam went silent and sara frowned, glancing back at him and letting out an exasperated sigh. Liam had his hand on one of the large mushrooms beside them. "Don't touch that, jeez. It could be poisonous or melt through your armor!" Liam sheepishly withdrew his hand, wiping the goop off his hand on the moss. "Sorry.." Sara shook her head, pushing forward. "Come on we have to--" she trailed off as they rounded the curve, the area in front of them was like a death trap, lightning in constant contact with the ground. Sara felt her skin prickle with static and jumped out of the way before a bolt struck the spot where she stood. Liam called out from beside her, the crackle of electricity almost deafening. 

"um, what the hell is this?!" 

Sara shook her head, yelling over the noise. "We have to push through!" She grabbed his arm and booked it through the area, dodging floating rocks and bolts of lightning. Her shields were taking heavy damage, and it didn’t take long for them to break. 

Pain shot across her torso as she dodged an electrified rock, amplified by the metal of her armor. She staggered backwards, ahead there was a break in the mountain where the path continued. lightning didn't touch it due to the rock sheltering it. 

"It looks safer under there! C'mon!" 

She ran with Liam close behind her, a large bolt of lightning striking behind them as they entered, blowing them further into the cave. Liam cried out, rolling into the wall, groaning in pain. Sara panted softly, an burning sensation on her left shoulder. When she looked, she had a breach in her armor, the electricity ate at the metal and fibers of her suit, burning her skin. She cursed, but there was little she could do. She looked at Liam, jogging over to him and offering her hand. "You good?" Liam took her outstretched hand, grateful. "Yeah, I'm good. Hey your shoulder-"  
Sara waved him off. "I'm alright. I've got some medi-gel and as long as my barrier holds ill live." 

She turned to push on farther, looking to the side of the mountain. "It looks like the crash went over there." Liam nodded, pointing at the cliffs along the edge. "We could jump from there." Sara glanced down, looking past the edge where the cliff dropped. "Into the breach?" Liam laughed softly, patting her back as he jogged past her. "We'll be careful. Lets go."   
They jumped onto the ledge, pushing onward. Another particularly higher ledge blocked their path. Liam shook his head halting as they reached it. "don’t think my jump jet'll carry me that high." Sara looked up, she could reach it using her biotics. "I could reach it with my biotics. I'll get up there and help you up." Liam nodded, standing back as Sara took a running jump. 

She grabbed onto the ledge, bracing her legs on the rock and pushing herself up. She stood up on the ledge, one of the large alien pillars they saw coming in was in the distance, and it seemed to be the source of the storm. She helped Liam up, and he shook his head upon seeing it. "what is that?" 

Sara sighed, this day just kept getting better and better. 

"Well, it's not a hotel that’s for sure."


	5. Calvary

Sara's footsteps were hurried as they followed the chaos that their crash landing caused. Thousands of things crossed her mind as she moved, her eyes kept glancing at the sky, the tumultuous cloud that hovered over the monolith was… it didn't feel right, like it wasn't natural. Then again, the lightning ate through her shields like butter melted on a hot pan. Her shoulder still hurt, Liam insisted on bandaging it, but she could feel the medi-gel's cooling effects kicking in. she had only seen wreckage of their shuttle, and so far no sign of their team, to say she was getting worried was an understatement. 

Liam's voice snapped her out of her thoughts, "hey, look there, it's Fisher!" 

Sara looked ahead, he was right. Fisher was braced against the half of their shuttle, but he wasn’t alone. 

And the things with him weren't human. 

Sara shoved Liam down behind a rock, he made a startled noise, glaring at her as she crouched behind it. "What was that for?" Sara looked over her cover, hand on her pistol. "look!" she hissed, her voice low. Liam looked, his eyes widening. "Holy shit… what was first protocol again?" 

Sara repeated the words that her father had drilled into her head when she joined the initiative. "No deadly force unless fired upon." Liam scoffed, pulling out his assault rifle. "Said no one in the field ever…" he looked unsure, bouncing on his heels as he crouched. "How do you want to handle it?" 

Sara glanced over at the aliens, chewing the inside of her cheek. "just be ready if this goes south." Liam nodded, and they both came out of cover, inching forward. 

There were three of them, armed with strange looking weapons and heavily armored. At least, Sara assumed it was armor. Perhaps it was a kind of plating? Like turians? She chastised herself, now was not the time to be a science nerd, Sara. One of them spotted them, growling in a language that their translators couldn't process. "We can't understand you, just give us our guy or this gets ugly!" 

"Ryder…" Liam warned at her side, gun trained on the one moving towards Fisher. The one nearest to them turned to the other, yelling something and it raised its gun, barrel trained on Fisher. Sara didn't think; she just reacted. Drawing her pistol and emptying her clip into it before it could fire. The other two shrieked and fired at them, Sara ducked behind the rocks, Liam firing at the two from her right. She enveloped herself in a biotic charge, barreling into the nearest alien. The attack stunned it, and gave Sara time to wip out the sword Cora had given her, slashing the things throat. Brackish green blood sprayed from the wound, thankfully away from her face as the body slumped to the ground, Liam had taken out the last one and ran to Fisher.   
"Hey man, you alright?" 

Fisher sighed, relieved. "Nice timing, good to see you guys. Yeah, I'm okay I think. Thanks for jumping in. what do you think these guys wanted?" Sara knelt down, scanning Fisher for serious damage as Liam spoke. "Nothing good the way they were armed." Sara rolled her eyes, holstering her weapon. "Who says they'd even understand us? Or that we would understand them?" she stood up, closing her scanner. "New galaxy, suppose it's too much to expect they'd play by milky way rules." 

Liam shook his head, gesturing to one of the corpses with his rifle. "or any rules, by the look of them." Fisher sat up straighter, it looked like his leg was broken. "yeah, But… what did we do to them?" no one answered him. Liam turned back to them, keeping his weapon drawn. "Only thing I know, their weapons hit as hard as ours." he glanced around, puzzled. "Where's everyone else?" 

"Kirkland and Greer went looking for help." Sara looked down at him, glancing him over. "Can you walk with that leg?" Fisher shook his head, sighing in pain. "No… no I don’t think I can. You guys push ahead, look for the others." Sara didn't like that idea, more of those aliens could come back… "You sure?" Fisher waved them off. "Yeah, just find us a ride out of here. And take a few more of them out while your at it." 

Sara nodded slowly, pulling out her pistol and handing it to him. "Use it if more of those assholes come around." Fisher took the gun, nodding. Liam called out to her from one of the bodies. "woah, check these guys out…"  
Sara walked over to him, scanning the body with her scanner. "huh. Well, I don’t have SAM here but I can try to make sense of it… they're DNA based, and their armor reads as some sort of bone, but genetics are all over the map…" liam paused thoughtfully. "I guess life took a different turn here." 

The pushed on, following the path of broken ship parts. 

As they moved, they heard voices from up ahead. "You hear that?" Liam asked, looking at Ryder. Sara nodded and drew her sniper rifle. The path broke off into a clearing, surrounded by some kind of architecture. Kirkland stood, surrounded by those aliens, his hands up in surrender. Sara couldn't hear what he was saying, Liam and Sara both broke into a run to reach him, but they were too late. 

A gunshot rang out and Kirkland crumpled to the ground, motionless. 

Liam yelled out in rage and charged in, a pair of omni-blades enveloping his hands as he sliced through the aliens. Sara crouched behind a rock, steadying her arm on the hard surface and picking the ranged shooters off with scary precision.  
She spoke calmly, once all the enemies were down. "Hostiles down." Liam stood next to Kirkland, motionless. Sara stood and jumped down from her perch, walking over to him. She clenched her jaw as her scanner reported what they already knew; "no vitals. Shot in cold blood." She kept her voice carefully even, if her emotions got the better of her she wouldn’t be back to see Scott wake up. 

Liam shook his head, speaking through gritted teeth. "He was trying to surrender." Sara sighed, this was turning into an emotionally grueling mission; logic was her friend right now. "Would we have treated them any different if they arrived on earth, armed to the teeth?" this gave Liam pause, and he sighed frustratedly. "Maybe not."  
She shook her head, Kirkland had a family… at least she wouldn't be the one telling them. She spoke softly, glaring at one of the dead aliens. "Peace isn't going to be an option here…" Liam was silent, somehow he knew that when they crashed. call it intuition. 

they pushed on; there was nothing they could do for Kirkland, and they still needed to find Greer and the rest of the pathfinder team. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"do you know what you're doing?" 

"No." 

Liam made a frustrated sigh, hissing as she crept deeper into the compound. "Then why are you touching everything?" 

After they found Kirkland, Sara saw the building and was intent on exploring it, Liam wasn't as excited. She had started touching things, switching stuff on or.. Something. Liam followed after her and found her pressing buttons on some sort of machine. One of the buttons flared to life and the compound shook, the sound of machinery coming to life. "Shit! Ryder, what did you do?" 

She shrugged, stepping away from the console. Liam could feel his blood pressure rising; Scott wasn't joking when he said his sister was a handful. 

The place stopped shaking, the lights turning on with a tired flicker. Liam relaxed slightly, puzzled. "Its… a generator?" Sara shrugged again and left the room, calling out to him. "Hey, a door opened." Liam sighed, following after her. "Haven't you seen any of those old horror vids? Go into the abandon building, enter the mysterious room… get murdered?" Sara scoffed, rolling her eyes. 

"You scared, Kosta?" 

Liam came up beside her as they entered the room, glaring at the wall. "am not. Shouldn't we be trying to… I don’t know, find the rest of the team?"  
Sara nodded, looking up at the strange door in front of them. "Yeah… but this could give us some insight on those aliens… I don't think they live here. I wouldn't be much of a recon specialist if I didn't scout around…" She approached the door, running her hand along the smooth black metal… something about it was different from the technology the aliens wielded. Their guns seemed crude, like they just glued together some reactors or something… but this felt… older. 

She could feel the pulse of some kind of energy, electric, but not volatile like the lightning outside. She frowned, maybe they could get the door open? "I think-" the sound of machinery springing to life made her draw her gun, a strange robot thing rising form the ground beside the door. Liam cursed and fired a few rounds into it, Sara flinging a biotic orb at it. The robot fell to the ground, the gears slowing to a halt. Sara crouched beside it, scanning it. Liam was getting more and more uncomfortable. Sara made a thoughtful noise, looking up at liam. "this thing is old, like, centuries old… this looks like a lab of sorts, maybe these aliens are studying this stuff?" Liam frowned, looking at the body of a dead one by the door, apparently it wasn't as quick to kill the robot. "What, like archaeologists?" Sara nodded. 

"Yeah, bloodthirsty archaeologists." 

She stood up, satisfied with the data she collected. "Well, lets go. No need to stay here longer than we need to…" Liam nodded, heading towards the door. Sara jogged to catch up with him, but as they exited the compound she saw movement ahead. Someone had set up a lightning rod, drawing the violent strikes away from the ground. She drew her rifle, going to crouch behind a large crate. "Liam, movement on our 2'o'clock."  
Liam never holstered his gun, so he was ready when the first bullets zoomed by. "Are these guys following us?" Sara called out over the gunfire, pulling the trigger as a melee fighter ran into her scope. "Looks like it!" Sara came out of cover as one of those strange animals neared her, firing off a clip into the thing until it slumped at her feet, curling her biotics around her first and throwing the orbs, seeking out a target.  
The orbs collided with two soldiers and threw them into the air, suspended by a biotic field. The perfect target. Sara looked down her scope, nailing each of them with a bullet to the brain… or whatever was inside their head. 

"That’s the last of them." Liam said from beside her, holstering his rifle. "this planet is crazy. I can't believe it was a candidate for earth…" Sara shook her head, sighing. "Not anymore… hey, do you hear that?"  
Static pulsed over their comms, but it wasn't random. Liam nodded, touching the side of his helmet. "Yeah, its static, but in a pattern?" Sara nodded. "let's see where it goes?" 

They followed the static, running down a path that they overlooked when they came down from the crash sight, the signal seemed to be coming from there. Sara heard a familiar voice as they entered a cave carved into the mountain, Greer coming into view, cornered by two of those aliens. Sara pulled her rifle, calling out to him. 

"Don’t worry Greer, we've got you! Keep your head down!" the aliens turned, and greer ducked, just in time as Sara took them out with a singularity, Liam finishing them off with his gun. The bodies slumped, and Sara ran over to Greer, helping him stand. "Man, its sure good to see you… I was tapping my comm, hoping someone would hear." Sara smiled, relieved that he was still alive. "Fisher is back at the crash site, but kirklands dead. We still haven't found my dad yet…" Greer nodded, gesturing to the entrance of the cave. "I'll go stay with Fisher, you two go on looking for the rest of us." Sara and Liam left without much protest, Fisher and Greer would be fine. The path that led them towards the cave continued on, and as Sara walked she saw what looked to be a crashed ship. She pointed to it, calling to Liam. "Hey, look. Looks like they crashed here too." Liam tilted his head to the side, squinting. "So they don't come from here. You were right." Sara nodded, waving her hand as she descended the path. "Lets go, maybe we'll find more clues?"  
Liam followed her, watching his feet as they climbed down the rocky path. "What exactly are you hoping to find?" 

Sara paused; she didn't really know. She shrugged, keeping her rifle handy. "I… dunno. My dad taught me to evaluate the entire situation before you try to solve it… habit I guess?" Liam nodded, staying silent. Sara glanced back at him, curious. "Where did my dad find you anyway?" "I was a cop, and then crisis response. Tell you over a beer sometime?" 

Sara made a face, her lips tilting up in a half smile. "I don't drink much, but maybe I'll make an exception." Liam laughed softly, nodding. "Yeah after this mission? I could go for a buzz." Sara nodded, despite the voice in her head whispering 'assuming you make it back..', she didn't voice this though. positivity was good, no matter how naïve it seemed. As they neared the crashed ship, Sara saw more aliens, and they saw them apparently. 

Sara ducked as a bullet flew past her head, diving behind a large rock. At least the rocky terrain was good for something. She pulled out her omni-tool, initiating her tactical cloak and jumping onto the rock. It would last a few minutes, and that’s all she needed to take out some of the monsters from above. She could see the confusion her bullets caused, flying from seemingly nowhere until the cloak faded. She pulled out her asari sword and jumped from the rock, onto the shoulders of one of the aliens, driving her blade into the parts of its neck that were unprotected.  
Liam saw her jump from the rock, confusion striking him. How did she get up there? He shook his head, firing at the aliens that got too close to him, and eventually they were all down.  
Sara relaxed, the sword folding in on itself as she slipped it back into the slot on her belt, picking up her rifle. 

They heard gunfire in the distance, and Sara briefly saw the purple glow of a biotic barrier reflect off the rocks. Sara glanced at Liam, shrugging. "Well, lets go help them." 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Cora was beginning to worry. She had tried calling their teammates on the comm that Hayes had fixed but with no luck. And then the aliens that were attacking them kept coming back in full force. There was only so much her biotics could do, and they were slowly running out of ammo. Those aliens had them surrounded, but Cora was staying calm, if they go too close she would blow them apart. She threw up a barrier that surrounded their crash site, holding it as the aliens fired at them. 

Harry and Hayes were behind the crates they had set up, reloading. She just had to hold the barrier long enough so they could… Cora saw a blurr of white fly past the barrier, ramming into the alien that was doing the most damage to the barrier. The barrier dropped in her shock, luckily a familiar face popped over the rocks, cheekily sounding off. "We got your back lieutenant!" Liam jumped over a jock, firing at the aliens, successfully pushing them away from the camp. Cora had never been more relieved to see him really. "They're trying to pin us down!" Hayes yelled over as she threw a sticky grenade. "Doing a pretty good job of it too!" 

"Ryder! Light em up!" 

"Im on it!" 

Cora hadn't even seen Sara, but she could certainly tell when she started fighting. Bullets rained from somewhere above, killing the few stragglers that Hayes' grenade didn't blow up. Liam jogged over to them, and Cora saw Sara jump down from a taller rock, her armor must've had some sort of cloaking technology. Harry stood up, relieved to see them in one piece. "Calvary to the rescue, nice to see you guys."  
Cora nodded, "We've got weapons and ammo over there, stock up, before they make another push."   
Sara jogged over and grabbed more ammo, as well as another pistol. She looked back to Cora, counting off… her dad was nowhere to be seen. Panic surged in her mind, she tried to keep her voice level as she spoke. "Where's my dad?" 

"He went scouting ahead. Did you find anyone else?" 

Sara nodded, gesturing to the path behind them. "Yeah, Fisher and Greer are back at the crash site but… they killed Kirkland.." Cora's brows pinched together and she let out a tight sigh. "Hayes, did you manage to fix the comms?" Sara glanced over at the technician, who was crouched over the second shuttles comm device, with Harry fluttering about her worriedly. "It's a gunshot harry ill… there! Done!" SAM's voice crackled over the comms, frankly Sara had never been more relieved to hear it. "QEC link established. Sara, the pathfinder wishes to speak to you." Sara nodded, a bit puzzled. Cora was his second, so shouldn't… she shook her head. "Alright, patch him through." 

_"[Good to see you in one piece. What's our status?]"_

Her fathers face appeared on her omni-tool as Sara patched Cora's omni-tool into the frequency. "Liam and I are with Cora." Cora nodded. "We have wounded, but the good news is our shuttles fixed, we can get back to the ark." Alec's voice was sharp, but calm. _"[Not in these storms. Too risky.]"_ Sara shook her head, her emotions breaking through her voice. "Do you have a better idea? Because if so I'd love to hear it." Cora whipped her head to stare at Sara, slightly shocked. Alec seemed indifferent, as he didn't sound like he was scolding her when he spoke. _"[If the storm is the problem, then we solve the problem.]"_ Sara made a face, her brows drawn together in confusion. "I don't follow?" Her father sent a set of coordinates to her omni-tool. _"[Just rendezvous at my coordinates we'll-- damn it. They saw me.]"_

Their connection to Alec cut off, Cora sounded panicked as she spoke. "Sir? Sir!" she sighed, exasperated, turning to Harry. "Can you keep Hayes stable?" Harry nodded. "For now, at least." 

Cora nodded, turning to Liam and Sara. "Then let's go."


	6. Sacrifices

For most of Sara's life, she had always held together pretty well. She was the level headed one of the family, logic and reasoning taking priority over emotions and instincts. It was a trait that served her well during her N7 training, and many expeditions she went on in the Milky Way, it save her life many times. Even enduring the loss of her mother, she stayed calm and never let her emotions show too much, her father lost his mind after that. He was there but at the same time he wasn't, pouring everything into the production of SAM. Through it all she kept herself going through logical reasoning.    
   
But Heleus and the Andromeda Initiative had thrown her for a loop.    
   
So many things went wrong, and Sara didn't remember everything that happened. Waking up in SAM node was not exactly how she imagined coming back to the Hyperion after Habitat 7, to say she was confused was an understatement. She sat up slowly, a twinge of pain shooting down her left side. She looked down to see most of her arm and neck was covered in bandages. She remembered that, Habitat 7 was like running through a lightning storm holding a tall iron poll.    
SAM's voice interrupted her thoughts, it was oddly comforting. "Welcome back, Sara."    
   
Sara looked around, blinking as her eyes adjusted, her voice raw. "What happened...?"  SAM's reply was immediate, the blue light pulsing as he did so. "You were clinically dead for twenty-two seconds."  Sara looked down at herself, confusion glancing across her features. She didn't remember... the last thing she remembered was getting to the monolith with her father... and then... she shook her head, running a hand through her hair that had somehow come out of its braid, falling over her shoulders in soft white waves. "what... did everyone else make it?"    
   
SAM didn't reply and something by the floor moved. That something turned out to be someone, as her eyes focused on the person. Liam stood up from his spot on the floor, looking relieved. "Hey, you're still with us," He moved to press a button on the console, "Guys, get to SAM node, Ryders awake." He turned back to her, a relieved smile on his face. "Who were you talking to?"    
   
Sara frowned, didn't he hear SAM? "SAM...?"  Liam shook his head, though he didn't look puzzled. "I didn't hear him."    
   
The doors to SAM node opened and Lexi and Cora rushed in. Cora looked worried, pained and relieved at the same time. Her voice was tired as she spoke. "You're awake."    
   
Lexi didn't leave much room for talking, as she insisted on running medical tests, lifting the bandages from her neck and applying more medigel. "You should have been more careful. That lightning spread like fire on gasoline. You're lucky it's only surface burns..."  Sara shook her head, still trying to piece together her memory, it was all fuzzy... Lexi brought her attention back, checking her pupil function. Something caught her attention in the corner of the room, her eyes widening, focusing solely on the helmet on the floor.    
   
"My father, where...?"    
   
Her question was met with only silence, Cora and Lexi exchanging a glance. No one met her gaze, not even Liam, which only made her feel worse. Her heartbeat quickened and took a shuddering breath, thousands of things running through her mind. "someone answer me, _please._ " Her voice was pleading, cracking on the last word.    
Cora sighed, setting her eyes on the floor. "it was your life or his... and he chose you."    
   
Cora's words hit her like a battering ram, sweeping the breath out of her lungs, images flashed in her head; she remembered now.    
   
They made it to the tower, and her dad interfaced with it, the storm cleared... they were blown off the tower. Her helmet shattered...    
   
Sara took a gasping breath, her heartbeat speeding up. She barely heard SAM speak over the pounding of blood in her ears.    
   
"Dr. T'Perro, she is having a panic attack."    
   
She felt hands on her shoulders, Lexi's face coming into her view. "Sara, Sara! Look at me! Breathe, in and out. Deep breaths."    
   
her father's voice rang out in her head, "Deep breaths..." His face ingrained in her mind... the last words he said to her. She inhaled sharply, pushing lexi away, curling in on herself. Her dad was dead? First mom... now... now... who would lead the Hyperion? She shook her head, her chest rising and falling rapidly. Lexi called for something and Sara felt a sharp pinprick in her neck, a soothing warmth flowing over her, her heartbeat and breathing slowing down.    
   
"Heart rate and respiration returning to normal."    
   
SAM's voice rang heavy through the room, Sara's green eyes flicking up to the three people in front of her, managing to choke out a coherent sentence. "Why are we in SAM Node...?" Cora seemed hesitant to answer, luckily Lexi did so for her. Lexi chose her words carefully, not wishing to repeat a panic attack.    
   
"SAM is now... part of you, in a way we don't entirely understand... it wreaked played with your brain."    
   
Sara took a deep breath, preparing herself. "SAM?"     
   
The AI responded, it might have been Sara's imagination, but she was sure she could hear a hint of sorrow in his voice. "Your father authorized the transfer of Pathfinder authority to you."    
   
Sara didn't speak for a moment, taking another deep breath. "That should be Cora."    
   
Cora nodded slowly. "In theory... in reality, you're the new Pathfinder, Sara."    
   
Sara shook her head, white hair falling in her face. "yeah. Got that part..." She sighed and stood up, steeling herself. "Is the Ark still drifting?"     
Cora shook her head, holding up her hands. "Hold on, being pathfinder is a serious job, you sure you're up for it?" Sara's gaze hardened as she folded her arms. "We'll all die if I'm not, and I won't let that happen." Lexi walked over to tone of the terminals, speaking in a stern voice. "It's all academic anyway—SAM's linked to your mind on a deeper level now, even if we tried to untangle it, it would kill you." Sara nodded, whatever lexi shot her up with calmed her down enough to think clearly again, despite the empty feeling in her chest. "I wasn't questioning it, Lexi. Now," She repeated her question, setting aside all of her previous emotions, she couldn't deal with them. Not right now. "Is the Ark still drifting?"    
   
Liam shook his head. "Nah, see, that’s the thing. Whatever your dad..." Liam hesitated when he mentioned her father, but continued when she did nothing but look at him expectantly. "whatever he did with that tower saved the day, some sort of atmosphere scrubber."  Cora nodded slowly, keeping a steady gaze on Sara. "The energy cloud thinned out. We're on our way to the rally point now... we should be at the nexus soon."  Lexi objected from the terminal, turning back to them. "No, She needs to rest first."  Cora glanced to the doctor, and then back to Sara.    
   
"She has two hours, we need our pathfinder for this."    
   
Cora and Lexi left then, and Liam was close to follow. He slowed, turning back to her for a moment. "Oh I, uh... checked on your brother... still no change. But if … if you can pull through, so can he." He left with a short wave and a warm smile. Sara sighed, her shoulders slumping.    
   
"Your father will be missed."   
   
Sara lifted her head to look at the AI core. "What's going on, SAM?"  the blue light glowed brighter as SAM spoke. "This is our private channel. I shared it with him."  Sara shook her head, tears broke through, but she didn't feel anything. It was like a numbness that spread from her heart to... everything else.    
   
She was alone.    
   
Her voice was empty of emotion as she spoke, her brows bunching together in frustration. "Why'd he do it... why me?"    
   
SAM hesitated before speaking, searching his memory cores. "...unknown... but he never acted without reason." SAM paused, thinking over his next words carefully. "Alec wouldn't want us to lose sight of the goal. He said pain emboldens our resolve. He would insist we grow stronger from his passing." Sara felt a sudden surge of anger, he cared more about the andromeda initiative than about her and Scott, and then throws his life away. As if she spoke her thoughts out loud, SAM responded.    
"That's not true Sara. Alec and I shared experiences. I felt everything he did. He cared... he had a hard time showing it. He was very proud of you."     
   
Sara didn't say anything, she felt like she was being scolded. She walked over to her father's helmet, taking it in her hand gently. "I... I'm sorry... w-we never..." She choked on her words, tears falling faster and her grip on the helmet tightening. "I never knew how much he cared until... u-until it was too late..." Her voice trailed off into a soft sob, clinging to the helmet.    
Sara felt a soothing presence wash over her, and she realized it was SAM. The AI spoke, somehow gently. "I did not mean to cause further distress, Sara. My programming allows me to feel everything you do... and I see now that your fathers distance has hurt you, and I do not wish to do the same. I understand that you will need time to process and grieve, and I will be here for you, should you need it."    
   
Sara wiped at her eyes, still holding her father's helmet tightly. "Thank you... SAM... I know you didn't mean any harm... I should get down to the bridge... after all, they need the Pathfinder..."    
   
SAM didn't reply, and Sara didn't say anything either. She couldn't fall apart, not now. Not when everything was riding on her success.    
   
When they finally arrived at the Nexus, Sara immediately regretted every decision in her life that led up to this point.    
   
Sara had arrived, ready and eager to help, but now it was the last place she wanted to be. Kandros was explaining everything that went wrong while they headed to Ops, and Sara was beginning to develop a headache. Sara winced and rubbed at her temples as the tram screeched to a stop, it felt like her implants were aching... Kandros led them towards the upper decks, and for the moment Sara was grateful for the darkness, had it been fully lit she would probably not be able to see straight.    
   
"Ah the crew of the Hyperion."    
   
Kandros shook his head as a Salarian approached, slapping a hand on Sara's shoulder. "Good luck." Sara stiffened at the touch, quickly recuperating as the salarian drew near, accompanied by another human. she must have been quite a sight, Sara, bandaged from her neck down to her wrist, with dark circles under her eyes. The salarian spoke, and Sara felt he was too sly for his own good, he certainly thought he was charming.    
   
"Im Jarun Tann, director of the initiative. You have no idea how much your arrival means to us."    
   
Sara bit back her snark, these people didn't need any more issues. She folded her arms, nodding. "We heard what happened, and we're ready to help."    
the woman beside Director tann spoke, she seemed to be in a fouler mood than Sara was. "We'll appreciate any supplies you can spare, food, water—we're short on everything."  Director Tann gestured to the woman, introducing her. "This is Foster Addison, she oversees colonial affairs."  he glanced around, almost puzzled, and Sara knew what was coming.    
   
"Where is the Pathfinder?"    
   
Cora glanced worriedly at her, no doubt because of the panic attack in SAM Node. Sara set her face into a cool expression, refusing to let her emotions betray her. "my father is dead. He made me his successor."    
   
Addison seemed shocked. "Alec is... dead?"  Sara gave her a look, it took all of her restraint to keep from saying 'yeah, no shit.' Addison seemd to pick up on that because she gestured for them to follow. "Please understand; the entire initiative is at risk."  she led them up the stairs and showed them the scans on a monitor. "None of the golden worlds panned out, they're a bust. And we've received no word from the other arks."    
   
"What happened to them?"    
   
Director Tann shook his head. "Unknown. Our supplies are nearly depleted. Rationing ought us some time but even that’s running out." Sara studied the scans for a minute, squinting not just in concentration but from the light, it was hurting her head. She looked back at Addison as she spoke.    
"We need to find more resources, but that takes people, and we can't wake them up..." Sara nodded, understanding. "until they have a place to live..."    
   
Addison nodded. "Now, more than ever, we need a Pathfinder." Tann looked at her, calculating. "that now falls to you Ryder. Are you up to the task?"    
   
Sara kept her expression carefully devoid of emotion as she spoke. "I don’t think my father would have picked me if he didn't think I could do it..." Addison scoffed, folding her arms and staring at Sara skeptically. "Your father won't be around to fix things if you fail." Sara cut her eyes at the woman, a fire igniting in them. She was in no mood to take shit from politicians, luckily another person spoke before she could rip into Addison.   
   
"That’s no way to greet a guest."    
   
A Krogan walked over  from the main galley window, dressed in blue with matching facial markings. "I'm Nakmor Kesh, superintendent of this station. I hope they haven't scared you off already."  Addison sighed, rolling her eyes. "It's nothing personal, but now is not the time for on the job training."  Kesh glared down Addison, who seemed to fidget under her fierce gaze. "At least the Pathfinder here seems willing to try. It's more than we've had in months, and we could use a fresh perspective."    
Addison sighed, shaking her head. "You've heard my concerns. I'll leave you to it."     
   
Tann spoke then, almost apologizing for Addison. "We're all feeling the pressure... come by my office later and we'll discuss giving you a scout ship. I will be happy to work out the details with your associate?" Director Tann glanced at Cora before walking away. Cora gave Sara encouraging smile and followed, discussing something with him as they walked.    
That just left Kesh with Sara. The krogan gave her a lighthearted smile. "Welcome to the Nexus."  Sara sighed, rubbing her temples again to ease the pain of her throbbing head. "Thanks for standing up for me there."  Kesh nodded, gesturing to the rest of the center. "Hope's in short supply here. Whatever piece of it left should be given the chance to bloom."    
   
One of the technicians called to her. "Ma'am, the Hyperion's core is online."    
   
Kesh motioned for Sara to follow. "Let me show you something."    
   
They walked towards the large consoles in front of the Galley windows, lights flickering on all along the nexus.    
"An hour ago, that was all dark. But with the power form your ship, you're keeping the lights on. You have my vote."    
   
Sara couldn't help her pessimistic outlook, especially after Addison's remark. It was too soon to bring up her father like that. "and when the power runs out?"  Kesh glanced at her, tipping her head to director Tann's office. "You best speak to Tann, make sure that doesn't happen." She turned and began walking away, calling out over her shoulder. "And don't be shy—come see me when you have a chance."    
   
Sara let a soft sigh fall from her lips. She should go talk to Tann, The lights were beginning to make her vision blur. She walked down the stairs, her white hair lifting softly as she did, her footsteps soft and quiet as she entered Director Tann's 'office'. She overheard cora talking about habitat 7, and her throat tightened as she remembered.    
   
"Ryder, we were discussing your next expedition."    
   
Sara sighed, nodding. "alright, was beginning to wonder who was in charge." Director Tann looked smug as he replied, placing his hands behind his back. "Director Addison is entitled to her opinion. Mine overrules hers." Sara snorted, lifting a brow. "Does she know that?"    
   
Director Tann shifted, lifting his head, not that he needed to. he was taller than her anyways. "I oversee the entire initiative. And I've decided to give you a chance to prove yourself. To that end, the scourge dealt us a serious blow. Whatever it is, our scientists theorize it's not natural."  Cora sounded puzzled as she spoke, frowning. "An artificial energy cloud?"  Director Tann nodded, continuing. "it wasn't here when we left the Milky Way, and yet it rendered all the golden worlds unlivable. Then there's the Kett. They're obsessed with alien structures found around the cluster." He shook his head with a dejected sigh. "It seems murder isn't exclusive to the milky way."    
   
He looked pointedly at Ryder. "Your job is to make these planets livable. Starting with this one, Eos." Sara squinted at the projected hologram, rubbing at her temples again. "How am I supposed to do that?"    
   
"Increase the viability of the planet, so we can establish an outpost. Then we can bring more colonists out of stasis. The more colonists, the more resources we can provide for the nexus. Everything depends on it, there are six worlds we hope to settle." Sara nodded, shutting her eyes and running her fingers over them. "If every planet is unlivable, how do you expect me to...?"  Director Tann made a 'hmph' sound. "a good Pathfinder would relish the challenge of solving it."  Sara cut her eyes at him again, and Cora interjected before Sara could sass off at him. "Right, I think I should go check on things."    
   
she turned and left, which left Tann and Sara with tension in the air. Sara held her tongue, placing her hands on her hips. "If I fail it's no sweat off your back, yeah? You'll just look for someone else."     
   
"Placing bets on people is part of my job. Some pay off, others..." His voice trailed off and Sara felt rage bubble up in her chest. "You play with people's lives. I don't. Point me to my ship so I can fix this shit."    
   
Her voice must have shown how angry she was, because tann was very quick to usher her out of his office. "They're prepping it now at the docking bay. The coordinates for Eos will be in the computer." She left without another word, heading to the tram. Just as she was about to input the code for the docking bay a sharp pain shot through her head, her ears ringing. She hissed, a hand coming to her temples.    
SAM's voice echoed over their private channel. "Sara, please see me in SAM Node on the Hyperion, your implant needs attention, and we need to discuss a personal matter."    
   
Sara sighed softly as the pain subsided, changing the input to the Hyperion deck.


	7. Meet the Crew

Luckily, the headache Sara had went away shortly after she arrived at the Hyperion's Habitation deck. She glanced at the doors to the cryo bay, her throat tightening. No, not now… Scott's condition wouldn't have changed… she had to see SAM and then go to the docking bay. That’s it. 

She maneuvered past the workers and technicians, making her way quietly to SAM Node. No one really gave her a second glance, and for that she was grateful. As she approached the doors to SAM Node, inputting her ID code, she glanced at the doors to her fathers quarters… her quarters now… 

She hadn't been inside before, and she didn't want to… it felt wrong. Like she was prying into his business, god knows how he hated that. She shook her head sighing softly and walking through the doors once they opened. "SAM? You said you had something we needed to discuss?" 

The AI's hologram appeared in front of her, flickering as he spoke. "I have adjusted my connection to your implant, the headache you experienced earlier should not reoccur." Sara nodded, frowning slightly. "Yeah, what was that about? You said there was something personal?" 

SAM paused before speaking. "You should know certain facts before you proceed on your expedition. It seemed best we speak alone." Sara lifted a brow, confused. "what kind of facts? Why all the sneaking about?"  
"Your father felt it was for the best." 

Sara narrowed her eyes, of course. Leave it to her father to be hiding something. "What was he hiding?" "My true capabilities. Alec overrode the implant's safety protocols. It allows me unrestricted access to the Pathfinders physiology." Sara felt a twinge of uncertainty, speaking slowly. "That’s… me, now…" 

SAM felt her discomfort, speaking again in hopes to ease it. "And only you. I act as a force multiplier, dramatically enhancing your motor and neural skills when required. Alec called them 'profiles'. They provide unique tactical augmentation during combat." a brief pause. "Your father preferred to keep this fact to himself." 

Sara nodded, sighing and running a hand over her face. "Yeah. I understand… but that’s all you do right? No frying my brain or anything?" it took SAM a second to place the sarcasm in her voice, replying in a deadpanned voice. "No Sara, I will not fry your brain. It would end badly for both of us." she shrugged, shaking her head. "Me more than you." 

Sara felt that if SAM could nod, he just did. "I merely provide an enhancement to your abilities, it is a symbiotic relationship that benefits both." Sara tilted her head to the side, curious. "What do you get out of it?" SAM spoke in a different tone, almost matter-of-factly. "Though I am artificial in design, I am fully sentient. Far beyond that of what the… initiative, understands." Sara frowned, puzzled. "Care to elaborate?" 

"I am a new form of AI, drawing directly from human experiences. Your implant is my window into the world. What you see, I see," SAM seemed to hesitate for a moment. " and what you feel, I feel."  
Sara nodded, not caring to delve more into the subject. "Any thing else I should know." SAM spoke hesitantly, sounding puzzled, if that was possible. "I find myself in an unusual position. Though I had access to your fathers memories, there is… a gap in my understanding." Sara shook her head, not liking how this sounded. More secrets… "How?"  
"It seems he placed a block on portions of my memory array." Sara glared at the floor, damn it Dad. He was always so paranoid, he didn’t even trust his own family sometimes. What was so damn important that he would hide it from her even when he was dead? "Why, SAM?" 

"perhaps so when you asked what his plan was, I would not know." 

Sara sighed, lifting her gaze to SAM. "And dad strikes again." "but not without recourse." SAM added, " the further you explore as a pathfinder, the more blocks will be removed. Perhaps you should begin in your fathers quarters?" Sara felt her gut twist, she wasn't quite ready for that yet. SAM felt her discomfort, and spoke before she could. "I see… then, unless you have more questions, your ship awaits." 

Sara nodded, she would have to go in there sooner or later… "thanks." with that Sara turned, heading back to the tram. Maybe she should stop by the cryo bay…? There wasn't any harm in checking up on Scott… her comm pinged, and Cora's voice sounded over it. "you finished up? Got word on the ship, its ready to go."   
Sara shook her head, she should get to work… Scott would be okay. "Yeah, I'll meet you at the Tram." 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

Vetra could hardly believe it. 

After a year of waiting, finally, a Pathfinder had arrived! Word traveled quickly, when the Hyperion docked, but with the good news came the bad. Kesh had said that the human pathfinder died, and for a second Vetra felt a wave of despair crash over her. That is, until Kesh told her about the pathfinders daughter. Apparently she had inherited the job on a whim, and was going to head to Eos within the hour. 

There was no way she was going to sit by on the nexus another day, the Tempest was finally going to a pathfinder, and she was jumping at the chance to do...something! Her mandibles clicked in anticipation as she practically ran through Ops, having just received the report from Kesh. She nearly ran over a technician she was in such a rush, she apologized briskly and was off again. She needed to be in the docking bay an hour ago! Luckily Vetra knew faster ways around the nexus than the tram, and reached the docks within thirty minutes. She slowed her roll, trying to keep herself calm and collected, though the excitement was nearly overwhelming, but she couldn’t get her hopes up too much. She let out a short exhale, and in the next few minutes was ordering everything around. 

They needed supplies; rations, weapons, armor, those actuators that Gil had been whining at her about for months… and outpost supplies were a must, if something did change then they needed to be prepared for everything. Medical supplies were being taken care of, a lovely asari doctor had already reported to the Tempest, things were looking good. All Vetra had to do was make sure that Addison didn't try to delay them any more, and wait for the Pathfinder to arrive. 

Vetra was nearly finished sending their supply reports to Kesh when someone contacted her through her omni-tool. Vetra slipped on her vison, patching then through. "Pathfinder en route, how's the ship?" 

Vetra couldn't help it, she was very excited and her voice showed it. "In final checks and looking great." 

"We won't be long." the connection closed and Vetra tossed aside her reports, making sure everything was in perfect condition as she exited the ship. It wasn't hard to spot the Pathfinder when she arrived. Vetra had heard from Kesh that she was pretty banged up, and got a pretty decent picture from Kesh's description. She saw her from across the docks, white hair was unusual, at least from the humans she'd seen. She looked… tired, like she had walked through hell and was unlucky enough to come back. Vetra straightened, calling to the workers as she walked down the ramp. "Let's pick it up a bit people, we're fourteen months late!" She picked up one of the crates, handing it off to a worker as the Pathfinder and her second approached. 

Vetra's mandibles shifted as she turned, assuming her usual professional demeanor. "so you're the one who's making everything happen… Vetra, Vetra Nyx. Initiative wrangler, provisioner, gunner, and everything in between." 

The Pathfinder nodded. "Sara Ryder, this is Cora Harper, my second." Vetra nodded, glancing between the two. "are we ready? The sooner we get out of here, the better." Sara lifted an eyebrow, in Vetra's experience it meant she was curious, or puzzled. "You're coming with us?"  
Vetra nodded again. "Yes. Otherwise they aren't letting this ship off the station." Ryder shrugged, though the action seemed to be uncomfortable for her, probably due to the bandages on her shoulder. "Sounds good to me." 

Vetra grinned, turning and gesturing them to follow her. They would've made it if another one of addisons goons hadn't stopped them. "Hold it, Hold it! You're not going anywhere!" Vetra cursed quietly. "Damn it." Ryder sighed, rolling her eyes. "Of course. I bet there's mountains of paperwork isn't there?" the man glanced at the pathfinder, not appreciating her curt humor. "Director Addison wants a full report of the Tempest's supplies, munitions, and crew." Sara folded her arms, shaking her head. "Of course she does." 

Vetra sighed, sauntering over to the assistant, putting a hand on his shoulder. "I've seen you around, Ben, right?" she steered him away from the ship. "You came here with a family, didn't you? Son still in cryo? I could pull some strings… get him moved to the front of the line." the guy looked at her, bewildered. "really…?" Vetra nodded, her mandibles twitching. "Yeah. Really." he hesitated. "they said he wasn't essential… but I miss him." Vetra patted his shoulder. "I got family too, ben." he sighed, giving the okay on his data pad. "it's done. Addison's gonna kill me…" 

"Smooth." Vetra turned back to Ryder as Ben walked away, walking back up the ramp. "Part of the job pathfinder. All things considered, it was an easy ask… Besides, you need people tearing down obstacles, not putting up more."

 

Sara and Cora followed behind the turian, and Cora grinned, whispering to Sara. "Finally, someone who cares about doing something and not just talking about it."


	8. Work, Work, Work

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is a filler chapter mostly, I didn't have the energy to go into all the details about the missions on Eos. I've already played it so much its just so boring to me, but fret not, there will be plenty of action. just not at these parts.

It took a few hours to get to Eos, hours that Sara spent sitting in her quarters and staring into space. Literally. 

The veiw from her room was beautiful, and had it come into her possession under different circumstances, perhaps she would be more appreciative of it. She got a very passive-aggressive email from Addison, which she ignored, and a few emails from Lexi regarding her emotional state of mind. Sara ignored that one as well, though Lexi probably wouldn't let it stand for long. She would have to talk to her eventually.  
Though, she wasn't sure how much good it would do her… sure it wouldn’t be stewing in her brain for as long, but sometimes… sometimes she didn't want to talk about her problems. She wasn't quite ready to expose herself like that just yet, even if it was to Lexi.

Kallo, the Tempests pilot, spoke over the comms. "ETA ten minutes, pathfinder." Sara continued to stare out into the void in front of her, barely moving from her spot as she spoke. "Thanks Kallo. SAM?" the AI's voice resonated in her head, it felt strange, but at the same time… it was comforting. To know she wasn't always alone. "Yes, Pathfinder?" "Tell Cora and Vetra to suit up and meet me on the bridge in five." Sara finally moved, changing out of her clothes and into her underarmor suit, apparently the initiative thought her gear was subpar and Kesh supplied her with new armor, even a new biotic amp. Vetra assured her it was the newest model, as new as they could get in Andromeda anyway… Sara walked out of her quarters, intending to head up to the armor lockers, but was stopped by their resident doctor. 

"Ah, Sara, I was hoping to catch you before you went planetside." Sara heaved a heavy sigh, turning to face the doctor with a tight smile. "What can I do for you Lexi?" Lexi gave he a small smile, but she had that look on her face that told her she probably shouldn't have ignored that email…  
"I would like to discuss your mental state. It will only take a few moments, though I would like to do a more in depth test once you come back." Sara sighed, but she knew Lexi was only concerned. "Alright Lexi, but make it quick please?" 

The doctor nodded quickly, her smile growing. "of course. If you will follow me, I don't think you want the entire crew hearing of your emotional… issues." Sara shrugged in agreement, following Lexi into the med bay, the doors sliding shut behind them quietly. "I'll only ask a few questions, SAM's data helps but it is hard to get a good reading from just scans." Lexi turned back to face her, her expression serious. "Have you experienced any suicidal thoughts, since your fathers passing?" Sara's brows drew together in confusion, her mouth screwing into a scowl. "What? No! I mean…" Sara struggled to find her words, since she had been handed the job of pathfinder, almost everyone's reaction was basically a nicer way of saying 'Gee woulda been better if you had died instead but ya know'. It was… draining. And Sara couldn't say she disagreed. She heaved a sigh, rubbing her brow, already frustrated with her emotions. "No, I don’t want to die or anything. But I can't say that I don’t think I should have died instead." Lexi nodded slowly, scribbling something down on her pad, keeping her eyes carefully trained on her. "I see… have you experienced a feeling of nothingness? Or numbness perhaps?" Sara shook her head, rolling her eyes. "Lexi, I've felt like that since I came out of cryo. I think its safe to say I'm a little depressed."  
Lexi sighed, setting her pad down, folding her hands neatly in her lap. "Of course, but… It's my job to make sure you are fit for duty… I cant have you charging recklessly into a fight, hoping it will be your last." Sara smiled slightly. 

"I wont Lexi… promise. Can I go now?" 

Lexi sighed, moving her hands in a shooing motion. "Yes, yes, go on… I will forward my data to the nexus. And be careful!" Sara rolled her eyes, calling over her shoulder playfully as she walked out of the med bay. "yes, mother!" 

She chuckled as she headed up to the bridge, climbing up the ladder and walking through the doors with a soft whoosh. Cora and Vetra were already there, Sara nodded to them as she headed to her locker. She opened it and grabbed her armor plating out of it, spying a small box under it. It was scratched and a little beaten up, but Sara could still make out the inscription on the top of it; Alec Ryder. 

Sara sighed softly, shutting her locker and strapping the plating on over her underarmor. Her armor from habitat 7 was ruined, thanks to the lightning. Vetra had told her before hand that the initiative had taken her fathers old N7 armor and modified it to fit her. It was different than what she was used to, and a bit heavier, but she probably needed to build up the muscle anyway. Sara glanced at the weapons loadout once she got her armor worked out, frowning slightly. "Hey Cora, did my rifle make it back from habitat 7?" Cora shook her head, sheepishly shrugging her shoulders. "In pieces." Sara sighed, another thing lost. "ah… well…" 

It wasn't like they were short on weapons, she had plenty to choose from, but that one was special to her… she grabbed one of the rifles from the locker, initiative issue and a newer model than her old one. a Pathfinder Ranger, it was called. She weighed it in her hands and looked down the scope; yes, this would do. She strapped it to her back and grabbed a pistol, an N7 Eagle, another favorite form the milky way. She grabbed some cryo ammo and incendiary rounds before she turned to her team. "We ready?" Cora and Vetra both nodded, just as Kallo announced their arrival on Eos. "Alright, lets see what we've got." 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

By the time Sara got back to the Tempest, she was exhausted.

She had been tackled to the ground by an hyperactive Asari named Peebee, discovered that these 'Remnant' monoliths all connected to open some kind of vault thing which in turn stabilizes the planet; in Peebee's words, "the Kett weren't exactly cooperative but they're all dead now, so who're the real winners here." They met a terrifying Krogan named Drack whom Vetra seemed acquainted with, Sara was ultimately convinced that her presence was the only thing that kept her from being shot dead, recruited said krogan and settled an outpost. a win for the nexus that left her with more than enough bruises and a sore backside. 

Activating this 'Vault' gave them a lead, after escaping certain death by a decontamination field they found a map of sorts. a star chart if your feeling literal, it showed Eos' vault, and another one that was active. considering that Sara was the only one able to interface with the remnant at present, she hadn't been to that planet, let alone activated another vault. without Peebee it probably would've taken longer. it was their only lead. Sara had typed up a quick email to Addison, stating the new members of her crew and not much else before she collapsed on her bed. 

Being a pathfinder was hard work. 

SAM spoke softly from across the room. "Pathfinder, Should I inform Kallo to set a course for the planet with the active vault?" 

Sara sighed, waving her hand. "Yeah… I'm gonna try to get some sleep… it's been a long day." "Noted pathfinder. I will let the crew know not to disturb you." SAM dimmed out the window in her room, keeping the light out from passing stars and letting the room settle into a comfortable darkness, the only light coming from SAM's personal router. 

Sara sighed, thankful for the AI. "Thanks SAM." She changed into some lighter clothes, laying back on her bed and listening to the bustle of the crew that was still awake. she could vaguely hear Peebee bumping around above her, yelling across the galley for Drack, something about moving furniture or something. it... it reminded her of home. 

Warm summer days when she would run around barefoot chasing after her brother... those were the times that Sara missed most. her father and mother always made time for them then, even if it was just a few minutes. Ellen would have been sitting on the porch of their house on earth, twining pale blue flowers together as Sara and Scott ran around shrieking at each other, Alec sitting beside his wife with a warm cup of coffee. on those nights Sara would sleep with her windows open, breathing in the crisp air and staring out her window at the stars, wondering of life beyond her galaxy.

She drifted off into a peaceful sleep, her mind blissfully blank of the nightmares of her consciousness; dreaming of flowers on a familiar breeze, a family that wasn't broken, and a home that she would never see again.


	9. Aya

Sara woke up a few hours later to the sound of yelling. She sat up with a start, eyes wide open and her hair a mess. SAM spoke up from across the room, the image of the AI core flickering as he spoke. "It would be wise to intervene Pathfinder, before Ms. B'sayle is sent to the medbay for a concussion."    
   
there was a loud clang of metal on metal, a brief silence before the yelling resumed. SAM spoke again after a thoughtful pause.    
   
"There is a 96.2% chance the next tool Mr. Brodie throws will not miss."    
   
Sara groaned softly, jumping out of bed, and booking it to the galley.    
   
Liam was running repairs on the Nomad with Gil, and what peebee had to do with it eluded her, but by the amount of tools scattered on the balcony above the deck told Sara the wrench was not the only tool gil had thrown.    
   
"haha! You missed!"    
   
Gil grumbled something under his breath and reached for the socket wrench beside him. Sara skidded to a halt, huffing out an exasperated sigh. "Gil, do not throw that!"    
   
Gil froze, looking over at her, scowling. "the pathfinder won't save you next time Peebee..." Peebee leaned over the railing, sticking her tongue out at him. "Nah, your shitty aim will though!" The asari ran off with a cackle before Sara could question her, so she settled to glaring at Gil. "why were you hurling tools like snowballs?" Gil looked sheepish, turning his attention back to the nomad, that Liam was currently wedged under. "She kept asking me questions. Wouldn't stop bothering me about driving the nomad around, then it escalated... she won't have a problem playing dodgeball, at least."    
   
Liam laughed from under the nomad, "if can dodge a wrench, she can dodge a rubber ball."  Gil handed him a screwdriver, laughing along with him. SAM chimed in over their private channel, his voice sounding concerned. "Pathfinder, I suggest you head to the bridge, Kallo would like to speak with you... and perhaps put on pants before you go?" Sara glanced down at her bare legs, she had almost forgotten that she wasn't wearing any. She shook her head, marching back to her room before anyone else could see her in a flimsy shirt and her underwear. She fished through her drawers under her bed and pulled out her jeans and a darker tank-top with the initiative logo on the bottom. She quickly dressed and grabbed her favorite scarf and jacket, mostly to cover the scarred, discolored skin on her neck and shoulders... she couldn't quite look at it yet. Sometimes the scars reminded her of habitat 7 and... she didn't want to be reminded, ever. Slipping on her boots, she made her way out of her quarters, climbing up the ladder and walking onto the bridge. Tying her hair into a braid as she approached the console, talking to Kallo as the trajectory of the tempest appeared infront of her.    
   
"What's the status Kallo?"    
   
"We're nearing the coordinates provided by eos's vault but—" the console in front of Kallo flashed red, and the pilot jumped to change the Tempests course. "Pathfinder we're on a collision course with something big!"    
   
"Collision is imminent." SAM said, which honestly didn’t help Sara much. She took over the console, with help from SAM and Kallo, bringing the tempest to a halt. "Full stop now!"    
   
The Tempest halted, and Sara was terrified at the sight before her.    
   
Suvi gasped, her eyes going wide. "Kett ships... a dozen, no... more!"    
"They've got us pinned against the scourge!" Kallo exclaimed, trying to plot a course around or under.. Or anything!  SAM spoke, his voice warning. "They are scanning us pathfinder."    
   
"Well scan them back!"    
    
Sara didn't know what to do, this was way more than she expected. Were they tracking them? It seems unlikely that the exact course they chose to this planet runs them straight into--    
   
Sara's thoughts were cut short, as the consoles went dark. An image appeared in front of them and the crew fell silent, a kett staring straight back at them with strange, milky white eyes. The disturbance and sudden stop of the ship had drawn her squadmates to the bridge, Sara stood in front of it, and finally the kett spoke.    
   
"Where is the one that activated the Remnant."    
   
was it talking about her? Sara mulled it over in her head, the kett wasn't content with waiting.   
   
"The DNA signature is there. Answer me."    
   
Sara straightened, glaring at the screen. "I'm captain of this ship. Who the fuck are you?"     
   
It spoke after a brief pause, it's strange voice drilling into her ears. "You'll come with me." Sara felt a chill run down her spine, it was quickly replaced with anger. Who the hell did this guy think he was?   
   
The tempest lurched and Sara was thrown off balance, gripping the railing for support. Suvi was tapping away at the console, cursing. "They've locked navigation!"    
the tempest lurched again and Kallo called over from his side. "We're being steered into their ship!"    
Sara was grasping at straws now, she glared at the screen, gritting her teeth. "Just tell me what you want!"    
It  seemed to scoff at her, speaking in a tone similar to condescending. "I will not explain what you cannot understand."    
   
Over their private channel, SAM spoke, Sara felt like they were whispering. Considering the circumstances it was probably for the best. "Ryder, I've almost regained control of the ship. I need a few more seconds." Sara laughed in her head, stall him? sure. She lifted a brow, folding her arms. "I actually know a lot about the remnant. We should compare notes."    
   
Her sarcasm seemed to infuriate him, the way the boney plating around his eyes seemed to shift, his mouth curling in a sneer. "Enough! Your defiance is naive and reckless. This day marks the beginning of your greatness."    
   
Sara's little quip seemed to have served well, the lights flickered to life on the consoles; the Pathfinder was in control again. The connection to the kett was severed and Sara walked to the helm, speaking quickly. "SAM?"    
   
"I have plotted a potential course through the scourge."    
   
without consult from Kallo, Sara barked out an order, they were getting as far away from this nut-bag as possible. "Do it!"    
   
the Tempest swerved and burst past the Kett ships, straight into the scourge. The nexus wasn't lying when they said it was the fastest ship. Kett followed behind them, luckily the tempest was far more agile than their ships. Sara gripped the railing as the ship swerved, she would have to thank kallo if they got out of this alive. A shockwave sent the Tempest jerking forward, light from behind them suggesting the ships behind them were down.   
   
"report?" Sara kept her tone even and calm, she was always at her best in crisis situations, emotions aside. Suvi's hands glided across the screens, speaking as she tried to get readings on the outer hull of the ship.    
"Enemy destroyed, damage to aft sensors."    
   
Sara cursed, asking what she already knew. "Scourge got it?" Suvi nodded, stabilizing the outside shields as best she could. "Yes."    
the Tempest lurched again as they made another sharp turn, sending Liam stumbling into cora. "Get us out of here!"    
The tempest swerved and spun through the tentacles of dark energy, the last remaining kett ship doing a pretty good job of evading the scourge. It was then that Sara saw their exit, it was small, and they might not even make it. But it was a way out. SAM spoke then, a thin layer of concern in his voice. "It will be tight."    
   
Vetra was leaning on Kallo's seat, her talons nearly ripping through the leather. "Kallo...."    
   
with a last boost, the Tempest jettisoned forward, rolling as it passed through the small opening, an explosion behind them cutting off possible pursuers. Kallo threw his hands in the air, letting out a relieved breath. "Yes!!"    
Sara sighed, a small smile appearing on her features. They did it. The Tempest slowed to their normal cruising speed; now they needed to do damage control.    
   
Drack's laughter from behind her caught her attention, turning her head slightly. "Nice work, kid." Kallo looked back at Sara and nodded, smiling as well. She shrugged, a frown building on her features. "Yeah, but who was that guy?"    
   
Before Sara could get an answer, Gil's voice came through on the comms, and from the sounds it wasn't good news. "Ryder, We've got trouble down here, you need to find us a port now!"    
Sara sighed, shaking her head and bracing herself on the railing. "Great. Suvi, where'd we end up?"    
   
The scientist shook her head, still trying to get everything in order, Peebee ran over to help. "Sensors are heavily damaged, but I think we're at the vaults coordinates."    
Sara pressed her lips into a thin line, green eyes taking in the planet in front of them. "That will have to be enough. Kallo take us down."    
   
Sara braced herself as they descended through the atmosphere, the Tempest cruising at a higher speed than usual. Suvi was still typing away at the console until she stuttered to a stop. "W-We're being contacted?"    
   
Letting out a frustrated sigh, Sara turned back to the helm. "We have to land... open a comm."    
   
   
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   
   
   
   
It had not been a good day on Aya.    
   
At least, not for Jaal. He was sure somewhere in the city someone was having a wonderful time, but he was not. Being stuck on the most politically invested city in Heleus was not what he would describe as a fun or wonderful, and being shoved on resistance errand duty was even worse. He was originally there for training, sharpen his skills mostly, and return field report from Voeld back to Evfra.    
   
That was three months ago.    
   
Since then he had been assisting in training new recruits for the resistance, and running back and forth between Paraan Shie and Evfra. The way those two argued was enough to give Jaal a headache on a good day, it had already been established that today was not in any way, good. Making his way to Evfra's office was ingrained in him by now, he could probably do it with his eyes closed. Perhaps if he was bored enough he would. The doors slid open with a soft hiss of air as he walked into the room, the resistance leader brooding over landscape and strategic maps of Voeld; one map in particular though, one that Jaal had recognized. It was the Kett facility where they believed the moshae was being kept. A pang of sadness crept into his heart at the thought, melancholy slowing his stride. Their rescue attempts tried and failed and at this point he could tell Evfra was losing hope.    
   
Jaal was about to say something before a resistance soldier ran in, he recognized her briefly, she had come with him three months ago and was stuck same as he was.    
   
"Commander, our patrols intercepted an unknown alien ship, it's headed towards Aya."    
   
Evfra raised his head, shock clear on his features, coupled with his previous anger was enough to frighten anyone who had not known him as long as Jaal had. "What? How!" His voice was angry, though clearly not directed at the soldier, Tesia was it? She shook her head, fumbling over her words. "I-I'm not sure, It's not Kett but it is heavily damaged by Kett weapon fire." Evfra growled something and took the report from the soldier before shooing her off, Jaal watched him carefully, gauging his reaction as he read.    
   
There was a loud noise from outside, the open area of Evfra's office making it echo, a strange ship coming into view as it passed the Headquarters.    
   
Evfra watched as it went past, his scowl deepening. Jaal watched too, it was so different from their technology, and he recognized the symbol on the side. He had heard from Kadara that a strange new alien had appeared and taken the port form the Kett but... he assumed the rumors were just that, rumors. His mind almost immediately turned from confusion to curiosity, how did it work? Did it run on the same power their ships did? Or did they use some sort of different substance? He pushed those thoughts aside, he should be concerned. No one that hadn't known about Aya had been able to find it. Which begged the question, how? Did they stumble upon it on accident? Or know it was there all along?    
He opened his mouth to speak but went quiet as Evfra looked at him. "you know what this means." Jaal nodded, a sense of dread falling over him. "If... they can find us so can the Kett."  Evfra nodded, his expression grim. "Jaal, I need you to intercept them at the port. You are the best of us, and a damn good judge of character. If they are a threat..."    
   
Jaal nodded, understanding exactly what Evfra meant. It was his job, protect the Angaran people, eliminate the enemy. He had grown up understanding this. "I understand." Evfr nodded, clapping him on the shoulder. "I'm counting on you."    
   
Jaal walked out of the office quickly, a new mission at hand, and honestly more excitement than he had had in months. He maneuvered the streets of the city quickly, wondering what exactly he would see when he gets to the docks, or if he wanted to see it... he shook his head as he pushed through the large crowd gathered around the docks. It didn't matter if he wanted to see it, he had to be sure these aliens weren't a threat, and be prepared to strike if they were. He pushed past the angara, who were more than willing to easily part for him to move through, Finally setting eyes on these intruders.    
   
Or intruder, as he saw it. Though he had no doubt there were more on that ship, only one stood surrounded by resistance soldiers, hands held up in a gesture of surrender. Paraan saw him and seemed to scowl, but kept her face carefully calm. "Jaal, I have this in hand."    
   
Jaal slowed his pace, glancing at her briefly, before he stuck his gaze on the alien. "Evfra saw the ship come in and sent me to find out what was going on."  and neutralize any threats, though Jaal did not voice this. Paaran sighed, muttering under her breath. "of course he did..." she cleared her throat as Jaal advanced, analyzing this visitor with a critical eye, his optical scanner running analysis.    
   
"She's a human from another Galaxy, a Pathfinder."    
   
The alien dropped her hands as Jaal approached, though she said nothing. Her eyes following him as he neared. She was strange, but the Kett were strange too. Her eyes were a iridescent green that reminded him of the plants surrounding the city, her face was all curves and some harsh lines, long white … fur? Clung to her head, tied in a braid of sorts, the breeze lifting it slightly. Some strands framed her face, decorated with dark freckles, and seemingly no protective armor of any sort, just bare skin. Did all humans seem so... soft? She was short, only coming to about his shoulder, and even that was stretching it.    
 that was just what he could see plainly. She was clad in a jacket and a scarf covered her neck, but the fibers of her clothes were unknown to him, his scan revealing that most of her was organic, and there was a warp in the energy around her. Similar to the Angarans own bioelectricity, but now really wasn’t the time to be curious about the new aliens.   His voice was perhaps more hostile than necessary, considering he could probably throw her off the docks if need be, but if the human noticed she made no indication of so. "Aya is hidden, protected. What do you want."    
   
her voice was also different, lacking the subvocals that most angara had, but her expression remained the same, calm, calculating and guarded. He wondered if she was a good liar. Trust would not come easy to him, but her words gave him pause. "I apologize, landing here as we did, on fire," she sighed, her slim shoulders lifting as she shrugged. "was not the plan."    
Jaal tilted his head, he had not expected an apology. It took him a moment to catch the hint of humor in her voice. He felt a smile creep onto his features and he scoffed softly. "I would hope not, because if it was that would be a very bad plan." He stepped back, which seemed to make her relax a bit, though only the posture of her shoulders changed. He turned back to Paaran as he spoke. "I'll inform Evfra, He will be waiting in his office at the resistance headquarters. I'll meet you there."    
   
Jaal briefly heard Paaran speaking to the Pathfinder before he walked out of earshot. This day was proving to be more eventful than he had anticipated, perhaps it would be a good day after all.


	10. Quiet Moments

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> another filler I guess, exploring the thoughts of Sara and playing around with Jaal's character... still getting used to writing him.

Honestly, Sara had be a nervous wreck when she stepped off the Tempest.    
   
Afterwards, she supposed it was only luck that she wasn't shot on the spot, considering what the Angara had been through. After a tension filled passive aggressive conversation with the resistance leader, Evfra, Sara had been more than willing to assist the Angara with their efforts against the Kett. Evfra had been wary, which again, was understandable. Sara was determined to help, she desperately needed to get into that vault, but that wasn't her only reason. If the milky way species were to have any chance at survival they would need allies, drack said something about an old krogan saying; 'seek the enemy of my enemy and you will find a friend' or something like that... but allies wouldn't help them if they didn't have a place to live.    
   
It was very obvious from the start that Evfra didn't trust her, she wasn't exactly expecting him to honestly, though she had a pretty solid read on him. Or at least, as good a read as SAM could get from one tension fueled conversation. The angara that came aboard the tempest with them was another story... she wasn't sure what she thought of Jaal yet. True, he did vaguely threaten to kill her in her sleep, should she try anything, but he seemed... genuine in his attempts to assist. Sara had only exchanged a few words with him before boarding, and even those weren't enough for SAM to put together a good profile. He was blunt, but he was polite about it. He said very plainly that he did not trust her, so Sara thought it best to leave him be, though she did make sure he was comfortable beforehand. That conversation was about as awkward as it gets.    
Since then Sara had secluded herself in the vidcom room, studying the data SAM collected from the remnant vault and star charts, so many star charts... with Suvi's help, she had begun marking the parts of the cluster that were impossible to maneuver because of the scourge. Plotting possible routes around it, or through it, but that would probably be best left to Kallo and SAM. Most of the crew was asleep, except for Lexi nad Kallo, and probably Gil, since he was currently spewing poetry at her over her emails. Every now and then SAM would chime in and helpfully tell her she should sleep, but she was in no mood to deal with the possible nightmares that would chase through her mind... she would much rather work all night.    
   
Everything was a mess, the Nexus was barely holding together, it was a miracle that they had any infrastructure at all... it took every ounce of willpower Sara had to resist telling both Addison and Tann to fuck off, They weren't happy with how things went with the Angara, but she honestly gave zero fucks about their opinion at the moment. She needed to decide what to do next, Jaal had given her some information about where to start, two planets would need their assistance, Voeld and Havarl. The Team meeting that Sara managed to wrangle together went over this, but it was in the end, her decision. A team of scientists had expressed the need for assistance on Havarl, and Voeld was where the Resistance clashed with the Kett on a near daily basis. It seemed Havarl was the better option, the most time-sensitive, and it wasn't like the Resistance was incapable of defending themselves.    
   
Sara sat on the floor of the vidcom room, leaning against one of the sofas, her legs covered by star charts that were honestly way too big and needed a large table to properly examine. A few books were scattered to her right, and one hefty initiative manual was currently being used as a coaster for her coffee. Tapping a pen against her thigh anxiously as her eyes darted across the most recent analysis of those weird remnant consoles. Sara was able to interface with them because of SAM, but the rest of the brain work was up to her. Each console had some sort of puzzle to solve before fully interfacing, and Sara couldn't help but equate it to sudoku back on earth.    
   
Alien calculus sudoku.    
   
Each glyph symbolized something, Sara had no idea what though, and they needed to be in a particular pattern before access was granted. Thankfully SAM had been working on making a decryption key that would crack any other puzzles they came across, and so far had been successful.    
Sara was so engrossed in examining their findings from the vault that she almost didn't hear the doors below the vidcom room open, bits of conversation reaching her ears.    
   
"...yeah, I mean, our whole foundation is built on exploration and science so I guess that’s our reason for being here."   
   
"You left your home, and everything you knew, because you were curious?"    
   
"Well it does sound ridiculous when you put it like that."    
   
"I find it unlikely that all of your people left for the same reasons."    
   
"Yeah you're right, some moved for a new start, or just cause they were looking for something new, like peebee I guess."    
   
Sara lifted her gaze from the charts, frowning slightly. She recognized Liams voice, and Jaal's own deep rumbling was hard to forget. At least it seemed like he was finding his way around, she knew a thing or two about feeling out of place, it was an awful feeling. Though he probably felt more than that, considering the entire crew was alien to him, just as he was alien to them.    
   
"Well up here is the vidcom room, you—"    
   
Liam and Jaal had ascended the steps from the research room, and were currently staring at her. Sara couldn't help but think she looked like a hamster or something, her hair was in a messy tangled bun on her head, dark circles under her eyes, papers and books strewn everywhere, with the occasional pen and marker thrown into the fray too. Sara looked up at them, sipping her coffee. "hey. Didn't think anyone was still awake."    
Jaal was staring at her, looking puzzled, and Liam just looked amused. He snickered, folding his arms. "Yeah, I can tell. You having fun?"  Sara rolled her eyes, setting her coffee back down on the initiative manual.    
"just planning our next move."  Liam nodded, and took a seat on the sofa behind her. "have you decided yet?" Sara glanced at him, before flicking her gaze to Jaal. "Actually, yeah. I figured we could go to Havarl first, it seemed the most time-sensitive... I was hoping to get your opinion, Jaal."     
   
Jaal was shocked, he did not expect her to ask for his advice, It was a pleasant surprise. "I would be inclined to agree, the scientists at Daar Paaleav are not fighters."    
Ryder nodded, the corners of her lips tilting up slightly. "I'll give Kallo the Navpoint then. Next stop, Havarl..." Her omni-tool lit up along her arm as the comm system opened. "Kallo, set a course for Havarl, please."   
   
"Right away, Pathfinder."    
   
She smiled, and closed her omni tool, looking up at him once more. "I take it you'll want to tag along?" Jaal nodded, it would be nice to see Havarl again, and the scientists would probably be more willing to cooperate with a familiar face. "Yes, it would be best if I were with you, I am familiar with the planet and the science team." Sara nodded, turning back to Liam. "how bout you?"  Liam shrugged, flipping through one of the reports. "Yeah, let's try not to crash the ship though. I'd hate to fall out of the sky again." Sara chuckled, hitting his leg playfully.   
Jaal didn't understand humans yet, there were similarities between them, but also so many differences... The Pathfinder seemed at home here, on the Tempest. Her face was more expressive, not as guarded; she trusted the people on her crew. Did she trust him? Jaal found it hard to believe, she had just met him less than 24 hours ago... and he did threaten to kill her. He only half meant it though. She was such a mystery to him, and he did not like mysteries. He liked knowing how things worked, if tagging along on her missions gave him some insight to that, he would.    
   
A voice jaal was unfamiliar with spoke from the comms, sounding particularly displeased. "Pathfinder, you should be sleeping. If you continue to ignore my advice I will turn to Lexi, and she is not as forgiving as I am."  Jaal frowned, glancing down at Ryder questioningly, but she only rolled her eyes.    
"SAM you're not my mother, stop acting like it please."     
Liam chortled, covering his mouth to muffle his laughter. "no way, our Pathfinder's got a bedtime?"    
   
The doors to the galley opened, and in marched the crew's doctor, her brows drawn together in an angry scowl. "She does when she's been dealing with intense psychological trauma. Sara, Bed. Now." Lexi stepped aside, pointing to her quarters. Sara stuck her tongue out, a gesture Jaal was thoroughly confused about, and pushed the many star charts and papers out of her way before she slinked down the stairs, feigning offense, throwing her arm over her eyes and proclaiming dramatically. "Ratted out by my own SAM, I thought we were friends."    
   
the voice came back, sounding much like a mother scolding a child. "I will always put your well being first, Sara."    
   
As Ryder left, with a disgruntled Lexi chewing her out, Jaal glanced back at Liam. "Who is SAM?"    
Liam pointed to the vidcom desk, in the center where a blue glowing orb thing sat, floating over a modem. "SAM's our AI, Simulated Adaptive Matrix or something... Ryder's dad made him and he's part of our crew. I didn't think you met him yet."    
SAM spoke again, this time addressing Jaal directly. "Hello, Mr. Ama Darav."  Jaal stared at the vidcom desk, puzzled. "...Hello." Liam chuckled, seemingly amused by his confusion. "it takes some getting used to, that’s for sure, but SAM's real useful. Its weirder for Ryder though, I bet. She connected to him on some sort of... weird... mind thingy..." He moved his hands, wiggling his fingers. Jaal frowned, his brow furrowing. "I do not follow." Liam shrugged, standing from the couch and moving the star charts and books in his place so they were off the floor. "It's confusing, you should ask her about it, though I wouldn't pry too much about her family... that’s a touchy subject for her, she doesn’t like talking about them." Jaal frowned, were human families that different from angara? He could not imagine being distant from his own family, it was... unthinkable. He and Liam made their way down the stairs, and Liam parted ways back to his room with a cheerful wave. "See you later big guy!" Liam promised to explain more about humans when time permitted, if he still had questions, which Jaal did indeed have. After Liam left, Jaal returned to the Tech lab that he had made his little haven of sorts. He relaxed slightly, at least until he heard an angry pinging from his own omni-tool.    
   
Glancing down he saw several emails from his mother.    
   
With an annoyed groan he begrudgingly opened the first email, no doubt his cousin had mouthed off about his jump aboard the Tempest. he... probably should have told Sahuna before he... jumped aboard...   
   
_'WHAT were you THINKING_  
   
_An alien lands on aya and you volunteer to join them? Jaal if you do not answer me as soon as this is sent I will drag you home myself._    
   
_With love,_    
_Your True Mother.'_    
   
Jaal shook his head, opening the second email.    
   
_'Jaal,_  
   
_Mother has been baking, excessively. She reicived word from Evfra, dunno if that has anything to do with it, but if you did something its got mother worked into quite the worried state._    
_You should probably write her, or better call. or both._    
_Probably both._  
   
_Lathoul'_    
   
Jaal rolled his eyes at this one, opening the third email, there was no subject for this one and only had one sentence, again from his mother.   
   
_'Jaal Ama Darav you answer me right now or I swear on the stars I will hunt down these aliens and bring you home safe.'_  
   
With a heavy sigh jaal sat down and began to write to his mother. This would be a long night.


	11. Preparations

Sara didn't sleep well, tossing and turning for a few hours until finally drifting to a sleeplike state, only to be woken by the smallest noise. After a few hours of this she became irritated, thankfully Kallo had alerted SAM who in turn alerted Sara that they were approaching Havarl. Sara sighed, getting out of bed and brushing her hair, putting it in a low ponytail before she got dressed. She had to stop by the research room and see if she could do something about her sniper rifle, the initiative issued one was good but after using the same gun for years it was hard to get used to another. She left her room quietly, some of the crew was still asleep if Drack's loud snoring was any indicator, stopping by the armor lockers to grab her sniper rifle and sling it over one shoulder.    
She didn't bother putting on shoes, her bare feet were quieter against the floor anyway, and she wouldn’t need to gear up for at least another half hour. Sara walked through the doors to the Research room, surprised to see the doors to the Tech labs open, Jaal normally kept them closed. She heard the faint sound of voices, though it was barely audible. Sara didn't approach, instead she stood at the research terminal and went about her business, she wouldn't make friends with him if she started being nosey.     
   
Cora had recovered what was left of her old rifle, fragments of the outer casing and the barrel, and a bit of the handle as well. Sara had intended to work on it before Lexi sent her to bed, now that Lexi herself was likely asleep, Sara could work in relative silence. Only the hum of the Tempest as it cruised through open space and her own thoughts to distract her.   
It was peaceful, actually. Her fingers working to take apart the initiative rifle and create something new with what remained of her old gun. She hummed softly as she worked, an old song her mother used to listen to when she was gardening, she hardly remembered the words but she knew the tune by heart. She didn’t want to modify the gun too much, just enough so it felt familiar under her fingers, using the handle and barrel from her old rifle to replace the ones on the initiative one. It took her a few minutes to get everything aligned right, soldering the last few pieces together, all she needed to do was test it.    
   
Too bad the Tempest didn't come with a shooting range.    
   
Ah well, she would have to wait. It looked alright, and everything seemed to function properly. Setting the rifle aside, she made her way up to the vidcom room, the star charts and remnant reports still scattered about the couch. She got to work folding the charts neatly together and straightening up her mess. Sara moved to pick up a larger map, only to be startled by a disgruntled half asleep Pyjak. Sara made a startled noise, the pyjak begrudgingly moving from the couch and jumping down from the vidcom room. Sara glared at the little creature from across the room, watching as it ran down the galley and swung down into the crews quarters. With a short sigh, she finished folding up the maps, scooping them up and carrying them over to the shelves they resided on before she had dragged them all out. Situating all of the maps neatly on the shelf would have been an easy task, if she were taller. Sara struggled trying to reach the shelf, and she was half tempted to start climbing shit. If Scott were there he would have no problem reaching it, he easily towered over her by a good foot and a half, standing at a whopping 6'5 to her own 5'5 height.   
Sara grumbled under her breath, pushing over a crate and climbing on top of it, and still she was a bit too short... if she only had a few more inches...   
   
"..would you like some assistance?"    
   
Sara froze, glancing behind her. Jaal stood with his hands behind his back, a quizzical look on his face. Sara felt heat flood her cheeks, smiling sheepishly. "Uh... I mean, yeah... I was just trying to put the charts back..."  Jaal let out a soft amused chuckle, stepping forward and easily reaching over her to place the maps on the shelf. She never noticed just how tall he was until now, when he was right up next to her, and He wasn't wearing that blue cloak, she wasn’t' sure if there was a name for it so she got a good look at just how buff he was too. It was intimidating. She didn't notice she was staring until she met his gaze, his eyes questioning. Sara stepped off the crate, feeling foolish and embarrassed, chastising herself internally. 'way to go Sara, just ogle him why don't you.' She cleared her throat, feeling the awkward silence like a wrench in her gut. "Thanks... I guess I'm just a little vertically challenged.." She chuckled softly at her own little joke, though by the curious tilt of Jaal's head, she assumed the humor of it didn't translate.     
   
"...it, uh, just means I'm short."    
   
"ah... I see. Are all humans as you say, 'vertically challenged'?" The touch of humor to his voice made Sara relax a bit, her lips twitching in a smile. "No, not all of us. I'm just cursed to be short, hell, Scott's taller than me."  Sara nearly bit her tongue, she forgot her brother was still on the Hyperion. She glanced up at Jaal, feeling even more awkward now. "Er... Scott is my younger brother."    
Jaal nodded slowly, surprised she would elaborate. On Aya she seemed so... reserved. Here on the Tempest it was like she lacked the social skills she very clearly had when speaking to Evfra. Perhaps it was a human thing, Jaal thought, this human in particular seemed complicated; more so than the others aboard the ship. Jaal was silent for a moment before he spoke, cautiously. "Angaran families are... very large. Are human families different?"    
Sara shrugged, leaning against the crate behind her. "Well, every family is different, though most human families consist of two parents and maybe one or two kids. And those are just on average." Jaal kept his gaze focused on her, tilting his head slightly. "And your family?"     
   
Sara found herself silent for a moment, she hadn't really spoke about her family to... well anyone. The only person she really knew was Cora, and that was just because her father had gone through pathfinder training with her, she didn’t really know her as a person. She sighed softly, shaking her head. "My family... well, my mom died... a long time ago. My dad died when he first arrived in Andromeda, and my brother..." She still couldn't quite wrap her head around the fact that Scott wasn’t there, they had done everything together and being without him was... it felt wrong, like wearing clothes that don't quite fit. It was an unsettling feeling, being uncomfortable in your own skin "My brother is in a medically induced coma." Sara tried to keep her expression neutral, careful to keep her pain on the inside where no one could see. Jaal was still looking at her, though he seemed less guarded than before. His voice was soft as he spoke, almost comforting. "I'm sorry... that sounds incredibly lonely."     
Sara shrugs, forcing a smile onto her features, ignoring the sting of tears behind her eyes. "Yeah it is... we did everything together. He's my other half, as my mother used to say... nothing will feel normal without him." She swallowed down the lump in her throat, straightening herself and folding her arms against her chest. "Well, thanks again for the help, Jaal. We should be at Havarl in a few minutes." She moved past him, grabbing her gun from the table and heading back towards the bridge.    
   
Jaal watched as she left, at least now he had a glimpse into who she was... something about her was unique and yet she hid herself from others using a mask of humor and snark. He felt that this conversation gave him a bit more insight into how she worked though, she spoke of her parents so offhandedly but when her brother became the topic of conversation, she rebuilt those walls she guarded herself with and hid the pain his condition caused her.    
   
A sad way to live, he thought.    
   
Jaal headed back to the tech lab, hearing Kallo voice over the ships intercom that they would be landing on Havarl in five minutes. He grabbed his rifle, stilling when he saw the messages from his own family. His mothers were worried, and his siblings were badgering him with questions about this new alien. Sahuna was still furious with him for jumping aboard so suddenly and not telling her immediately, but she was more or less just holding onto it so she could have an excuse to talk with him. It had been a while since he had seen his family and he missed them greatly. Perhaps he would visit if he could, after they rescued the moshae.    
   
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   
   
Sara thought Havarl was beautiful, and was honestly sad when they left the planet.    
   
After helping the scientists on Havarl, Jaal was sure that Evfra would allow her to help rescue the moshae, though Sara was skeptical about it. Evfra seemed like a hardass, she felt like it would take more than freeing scientists from a stasis field to earn his trust. Or maybe she hadn't earned it just yet, but it at least proved her willingness to help.    
   
Evfra was still as prickly as ever, bristling even more once Sara insisted the Angara would need her help cracking the Kett base shield. Sara revealed SAM, albeit reluctantly, and Evfra luckily saw reason.    
   
They would reach Voeld in a couple of hours, Evfra had been kind enough to send over the data the resistance had collected on the Kett base so SAM could familiarize himself with it. Sara sat in her room, reading over the complex coding the Kett had wired into their shields. It was enough to make Sara's head hurt, luckily even though she couldn’t comprehend it, SAM had no trouble with it. And while they wouldn't be able to do much until they reached the base, she thought it better to be safe than sorry. A soft ping on her terminal alerted her to a new email, she was surprised to see it was from Jaal.    
   
 _'Ryder,  
   
I feel I should address the conversation we had before, I understand that your family life is complicated and sharing your thoughts with me may not have been easy. Thank you for trusting me with this information, and... I would like to get to know you better, if I am going to be apart of this team I am going to try to get to know everyone a little better... starting with you I suppose.   
   
 I have always been close to my family, so I cannot imagine what you must be feeling, but Angara are open with our emotions. I have heard from Liam that with humans it is not so easy to share how you feel, and I am honored that you chose to share your feelings with me.    
   
Should you need to talk about anything else, I will be happy to listen.    
Jaal'  _   
   
Sara smiled slightly, reading over the email again. Jaal was so intimidating when she first met him, and now... well now he just seemed like a big teddy bear, a deadly, buff teddy bear. Though she would refrain from hugging him, at least until she knew him better. Turning her attention from the email to the silver box on her desk. She had been staring at it for hours, it was almost like it was taunting her...    
   
Before they were out into stasis, they were allowed to pack a few things away in a lock box, mementos from home and what not... Sara had set hers aside, she knew what she put in there. But now that Alec was dead... She timidly reached for the box, taking in in her hands gently and inspiring the code he had set. Captain Dunn had given it to her the last time she was on the nexus, and honestly Sara wasn't sure if she wanted to see what was inside. But she had already started, might as well finish it.     
   
The lid opened with a metallic squeak, 600 years would do that, she mused. Her breath caught in her throat as she looked at the contents. A family portrait sat on the top, preserved in a delicate looking glass, colored with swirls of purple and white. Sara picked the picture up gingerly, barely brushing her fingers across the surface, afraid it would shatter if she pressed too hard. She felt a lump building in her throat, they had been so happy in this picture... Sara and Scott were nine, it was just before Alex had been stationed in the citadel. And mom... Ellen looked ethereal, her bold red hair and sharp green eyes, so different from her children's stark white hair... Alec, with his dark brown curls and brown eyes... They must have looked like an odd group.    
Sara only remembered a father who was aloof and indifferent, gruff and harsh around the edges, and a mother who was too sick to get out of bed... But here, preserved in glass, was proof they were happy once. Alec was grinning, a smile that looked genuine, with Sara atop his shoulders, missing her two front teeth but still smiling. Scott situated on Ellen's shoulders mid laugh, his eyes shut tightly.     
Sara choked out a soft laugh, tears falling into the glass, hitting the surface with a soft _plip_ . She set the picture aside, gently placing it on her desk. Looking back in the box, a set of dog tags, more pictures surprisingly well kept despite being 600 years old, a flower that had been pressed flat and reserved by some kind of biotic field... A Stargazer Lily. Sara shook her head with a soft sigh. They were mom's favorite flowers, it seemed fitting dad would have one... even after all these years.     
   
Shuffling through all the photos, Sara couldn't believe he kept some of these. Most of them were half blurry pictures of her and her brother. The time Scott had shoved her out of the treehouse and broke her nose, then Sara pushed him out of the treehouse for revenge, though Scott survived without a scratch.  Shaking her head, Sara set the pictures back in the box, and the box back on her desk. That was enough family memories for now. "Hey SAM, how's that data coming along?"    
   
SAM responded, sounding particularly agitated. "It is frustrating, the Kett coding has a particular syntax that is… frustrating. I can do very little until we are at the base. Though I am confident I will be able to breach the shields, in… one way or another."  Sara lifted a brow, running her thumb over the indented metal of her fathers dog tags. "Speaking of, what's out ETA?"    
   
SAM paused, checking in with Kallo before he spoke. "Twenty five minutes, Pathfinder." Sara nodded, chewing on the inside of her cheek, a nervous habit. "Tell Cora and Jaal to meet me at the bridge in fifteen, please."    
   
Sara stood from her desk, slipping Alec's dog tags over her head, tucking them under her shirt. She exited her quarters, jumping up the ladder and heading to her armor locker, waving to Suvi as she passed. Voeld was going to be cold. Sara grew up in Alaska, so she was pretty accustomed to cold climates. It had been 600 years though, so she wasn't going to take chances, no frostbite for this pathfinder.    
Making some minor heating adjustments to her suit and she was as ready as she could be.    
   
"Pathfinder, I detect anomalies with your biotic implants."    
   
Sara frowned, SAM speaking over their private channel. "Anything serious?"    
   
"It does not pose a threat, an unusual spike in the element zero molecules has offset your implants, but your biotics may be more volatile than usual. I will adjust my connection to try and stabilize it for now, and recommend keeping the use of your biotics to a minimum." Sara nodded, fiddling with the strap on her glove.    
"Alright, give me the infiltrator profile and let Lexi know for when we get back. My biotic implants are probably going to need replaced at this rate."    
   
"I concur, shall I have Ms. Nyx procure suitable replacements?"    
   
Sara rolled it over in her head, she wouldn't know for sure until they got back… "Yeah, but tell her to keep it on the backburner, no use wasting resources and contacts until we're certain."  SAM acknowledged her request and went silent, just as the doors to the armor locker slid open, Cora and Jaal walking through.    
   
"this talent that you and Peebee have…"    
   
"Biotics?"    
   
"Yes, what's it like? Does it… hurt?"    
   
"When I really let loose its like a massive sneeze."    
   
"Fascinating… what's a sneeze?"    
   
Cora laughed softly, grabbing her weapons from the armor locker. "I'll let Lexi explain that one." Sara nodded to them as they entered. Cora's eyes darted to the dog tags over her armor, an expression laced with sadness replacing her carefree smile. Sara averted her gaze, tucking the chain under the collar of her armor.    
Lexi's voice rang out over the comms, her tone almost mother-like. "indeed, while your on the subject of biotics, Ryder," Sara could almost feel her gaze from the medbay. "SAM just told me, I expect you to take it easy. No charging in on your own, don't want you to blow one of your implants in the field."    
   
Sara rolled her eyes, it seemed like whenever Lexi wasn't stabbing her with needles she was nagging her, yet Sara felt nothing but fondness for the good doctor. "yeah, yeah, heard the whole spiel when I went through N7 training, nothing I haven't heard before."  Lexi's voice was stern and clipped as she spoke. "I can hear you rolling your eyes. This is not something to take lightly… just be careful. Please." the comms clicked out, Cora's gaze trained on her and concerned.   
 "what's wrong with your implants?"  Sara waved her off, though Cora understood better than anyone what dangers hella powerful biotics could pose, if left unrestrained. "SAM says some spike in the eezo levels in my blood are making them unstable. Probably just need a stronger implant is all. If anything my biotics will just be more dangerous."  Cora nodded, pressing her lips in a thin line. "to both us and the enemy."    
Jaal glanced at Ryder, hefting his rifle onto his back. "Are you fit for combat?"  Sara nodded, strapping her side arm to her thigh. "Yeah, I'll be good, so long as I don’t try anything too outrageous I should be fine. best case scenario is that my biotics lash out, my implant blows and I'll be unconscious for a few hours."    
   
Cora stared pointedly at her as she grabbed her weapons. "Yeah, let's not please?"    
Sara sighed, brushing her hands off and grabbing her asari sword. "No promises." she shrugged, slipping the sword into her belt and holstering her rifle as the Tempest landed on Voeld. She looked back at her squad with a small smile.

"Now, let's go stage a rescue.


	12. a Trial of Hope

"Suvi wasn't kidding about the cold..." Sara muttered as she stepped out of the airlock, shielding her eyes from the harsh wind with her hand. She felt her skin prickle under her armor, the freezing wind chilling her to the bone. Cora visibly shuddered from beside her, shaking her head. "we should keep moving. The sooner we get to the resistance base, somewhere warm, the better."    
Jaal seemed unphased by the chill, glancing at the two humans as they began walking with a curious tilt of his brow. "the cold doesn't bother us, and the blizzards provide excellent camouflage..." Sara set a quick pace for the group, the more she moved the warmer she would feel, though the cold was far more severe than where she grew up, there was something familiar about the chill. It made her smile.    
   
Upon reaching the base, they were met with suspicious glances and whispers, but most of the angara were eager to get their people back. If Sara could do that, then she was welcomed there.    
The team that Evfra had set up to breach the facility was already waiting when they arrived, and Sara was reminded again just how small she was compared to them.    
The Angara introduced himself as Commander Heckt, eyeing the small group skeptically. "You're the Pathfinder that Evfra was talking about?"   Sara nodded, half smiling. "Yup. That’s me."   
   
Heckt looked her over again, looking unimpressed. "We're the team that’s supposed to breach the facility with you, and hopefully rescue Moshae Sjefa." The angara beside him spoke up. "And i'm your pilot. The kett facility is on the other side of the planet."  Heckt spoke again, setting his hands on his rifle. "Ready to head out?"    
   
Sara nodded, her hands on her hips. "Let's go. You can fill me in on the shuttle." Heckt nodded. "Will do. Alright, lets move out, the sooner we get in there the better our chances."    
   
Sara's team went on the first shuttle with Heckt and his small infiltration squad, and the rest of the resistance team boarded two more shuttles that followed behind the first.    
   
"So, no one has ever seen the inside of one of these places?" Sara said, bouncing her leg slightly, another nervous habit. Jaal glanced at her shaking his head. "none who lived to tell. Prisoners who go in are never seen again. They are 'the disappeared'."  Cora shook her head, speaking up from her seat beside Sara.    
"That’s grim... no one's escaped?"    
   
Heckt spoke from his spot across from them, shrugging his shoulders. "Sure we've liberate work camps, but never these facilities," he shook his head. "We lost too many fighters trying. The price was too high."    
Another soldier spoke, obviously younger than the others there, Dwwin. "I like to think the kett take important angara from here to their home cluster."    
   
Jaal scoffed, looking at him quizzically. "What? As slaves?" Dwwin shrugged. "I guess..."  Jaal shook his head. "Death is better."  Sara pressed her lips into a thin line, shaking her head. "living a life without freedom isn't really living at all..." Her brows furrowed as she recalled the reports she'd read on the resistance efforts against the kett. "it's a nightmare."    
Heckt nodded, his gaze settling on her. "It's why we're excited to be apart of this mission."    
   
the pilot spoke up from the cockpit. "We're here, and let's make this quick the storms getting worse."     
   
Sara stood from her seat, grabbing her weapon and addressing the resistance team as the doors of the shuttle opened. "Once we've breached the shields, you take point. We'll look for Moshae Sjefa. Let's at least try to be safe." The resistance hacker on the team stood, smirking. "But Pathfinder, no one joins the resistance to stay safe."  Sara shrugged, shaking her head. "Fair enough." She hopped out of the shuttle, careful to stay behind the cover of the mountain side. The shield was right in front of them, and it didn't look like there were any patrols out.    
The pilot spoke over their joint comms, telling them to radio him when they were ready to go, and then the shuttle took off.    
They took it slow and cautious, Heckt and Sara's group moving together in the cover of the mountain. "Do we know what kind of force to expect?" Sara said, keeping her voice low. The hacker on heckt's team shook her head. "Not a clue." The group moved forward, with heckt heading up the rear and Sara and Cora taking point at the front.    
   
"Let's stay close, and don't draw attention unless we need to." Sara said as they approached the shield, Heckt's hacker Skaelv coming up beside her. "there should be a security node here... er, somewhere..."  Sara activated her omni-tool, running a scan on the shield. "SAM, what have we got?"    
   
"There is a hackable input on the right side of the shield."    
   
Sara walked over to the right, crouching down and prying off the metal plating of the security node. Skaelv hooked her own hacking system to it, and watched curiously as Sara hooked her omni-tool up to that. "SAM give me the engineer profile, please." a small visor appeared over her eyes as she worked, small nano bots leaving the tool and jumping into the wire mainframe.  "Alright, let's bust a hole in this bitch."    
   
 " adding my processor to the angaran shield disable program, standby... "    
           She got to work doing the smaller things, basically put a Trojan horse in the system, SAM being the Trojan horse. Typing away at her omni-tool and breaking through the firewalls so SAM could get in faster. The part of the shield in front of them fizzled, before breaking away, forming a hole just big enough for their group to get in.    
   
"I have created a small breach in the shields."    
   
Sara grinned, closing her omni-tool and the technical visor. "nice job SAM. Alright, let's get in there."   
   
 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   
   
Nothing could have prepared her this.    
   
Habitat 7, the death of her father... And now this 'Exaltation'. They had split up from Heckt's team, sending Sara's squad off to find the moshae while they caused a distraction. She should have known something was wrong when they saw the ceremony in the main courtyard but this... This was a type of horror that Sara had never felt before. It terrified her, if the kett could turn angara into them... What was stopping them from exalting her own people?   
   
 "They are... Us."    
   
 Jaal's voice sounded broken, and tore her from her own thoughts. He had knelt beside the body of the once angara, and it took Sara a moment to realize he was crying. "How many have I killed... Not knowing. Ryder, I did not know..."    
   
 Cora glanced at her from her . "I'm going to scan for the moshae, as should be in one of these rooms." Sara nodded, turning her attention back to Jaal. Had a been human, perhaps she would have hugged him, or done something to take his mind away from the situation. But he wasn't, and she felt awkward, putting a hand on his shoulder gently in some semblance of comfort. Her voice was soft but stern, this wasn't his fault.    
   
 " there was no way of knowing, Jaal... The best thing we can do now is make sure the sons of bitches don't get away with this anymore. " Jaal nodded numbly, still staring down at the corpse. Sara tightened her grip on his shoulder, looking ahead at the wall, speaking softly. "I will do everything in my power to get your people out of here... I promise."    
Jaal glanced at her, the pain and emotion on his face clear as day. "You should not make promises you cannot keep, Sara..."    
She patted his shoulder, her face set in a grim expression. She opened her mouth to speak but Cora's voice over the comms caught the attention of them both.    
   
"We've got her, She's over here!"    
   
   
Sara didn't have time to sympathize for what Jaal was feeling, because she was running gun-hoe towards where Cora sounded off, Jaal beside her. The grief that had overtaken his features a second before was replaced with a fearless determination she couldn’t help but match. They were going to do this and fucking win dammit.    
   
They ran into another decontamination chamber, much to Sara's frustration. Sara practically hissed at SAM to bypass the damn thing and by the time the doors opened the Cardinal was walking through the doors with the Moshae over her shoulder.    
   
"Moshae Sjefa!! We are coming for you!"    
   
Jaal's voice was loud and filled with emotion, and Sara briefly saw the angara pick her head up before the door slammed shut behind them.    
   
Bullets flew past her head as she ducked behind cover, the rest of the kett trying to cover the cardinals retreat. The tingle of her biotics under her skin was so tempting to use, but she had already stressed them enough getting through the kett before. Cora's been compensating, but ammo was getting low. Sara growled at SAM, "Switch to Adept profile."     
   
"Pathfinder that is not wise--"    
   
"SAM. That was an order."    
   
The AI didn't speak as he dutifully switched Sara's combat profiles, she would get screeched at later... later. Sara ducked out of cover, throwing her gun aside as the purple energy surrounded her and propelled her forward into the wall of kett in front of her. Her charge took them off guard, and the shockwave that followed nearly vaporized the two closest to her, the flicker of purple energy lashing out dangerously, a sharp pain in her head screaming she used too much too soon. She pulled her sword from her belt and lashed at the nearest kett, biotic energy crackling across the blade and slashing its throat, spraying murky green blood over the floor. Jaal shot down the last kett with his rifle, and then it was over. This part anyway.    
   
Her ears popped, and a feeling like static fell over her, a wetness dripping from her nose. She lifted her hand to her face, and seeing red when she pulled her hand back. She cursed, a headache beginning to take root. Cora ran over to her, holding Sara's rifle. "Sara! That was reckless!! What were you thinking?!" Sara sniffed, wiping the blood from her nose and grabbing her gun from her second in command.    
   
"that we need to get the moshae."    
   
She didn't leave any room for objections from her lieutenant as she was then darting after the path the cardinal took mere moments before.    
   
The fuzzy static the clouded her mind made the rest of the battle a blur, she somehow stumbled upon more ammo for her rifle, and the cardinal was wheezing at her feet. Was it... done? Her body hurt, she was shot in the leg with some kind of incendiary ammo, and her head was throbbing with pain.    
   
"No one has ever..." The moshae spoke wearily from where she stood, leaning against Jaal's bulk, her immune system was severely compromised and she needed to get out now.  Sara glanced over at her half grinning, vaguely aware of the blood trickling down her face from her nose and now a gash on her head. "I'm new here, I don't know the rules yet."   
   
"Pathfinder, there are multiple kett cruisers inbound."    
   
 The AI helpfully brought her attention back, and Sara glanced back to the rest of the facility, wrinkling her nose in disgust. "SAM is there an off switch to this horror palace?"     
   
"I can overload the shields, however the pulse would be lethal to angaran physiology."    
   
Jaal immediately spoke up, pain lacing his features. "No! We have... we have to save all the angara!" Cora shook her head from where she stood, gun trained on the Cardinal who was for some reason still breathing.     
   
"There's no time to open hundreds of pods, let alone help the angara inside!"    
With a wet wheeze, the cardinal spoke from the ground, slowly standing to her feet. "wait." Cora cocked her gun, narrowing her eyes. The Cardinal glared at her, turning her gaze to Sara. "I will release the chosen, I only ask that you leave this holy place standing."    
   
this time the Moshae spoke, her eyes going wide and taking a step forward or trying to, only succeeding to stumble forward with Jaal catching her. "No!! Even if I must die here, I will not--" Jaal cut her off, much to Moshae Sjefa's annoyance. "Moshae, with respect we have our strength here, our soldiers. We can come back and destroy it, we only have one chance to save those here." The Moshae cut her eyes at Sara, and suddenly it hit her.    
   
Like a train, or a thousand punches to the gut. Her breath cut short and her eyes unfocusing. It was like the weight of a thousand planets, suddenly she was a child standing in front of her disapproving father, sharp grey eyes glaring at her, cutting into her like a thousand knives.    
   
'what are you going to do Sara?'    
   
Sara glanced at the Cardinal, and then to the thousands of pods she saw on her way here... each one of them held a life... and each life was precious. It wasn't even a choice.    
   
"Alright, open the pods."    
   
a look of relief seemed to pass over the cardinals face, She gave an order over a device and took a step back. Jaal walked past her, going to give orders to Heckt, the moshae able to stand on her own. "Thank you, Ryder."     
The cardinal looked at her, her gaze unsettling and... smug. A sudden rage boiled in Sara's stomach. "I thank you as well, I see you finally begin to understand the gift all kett bring to Andromeda." The Cardinal turned her back to Ryder and without thinking Sara lifted her gun and pulled the trigger.    
It took a second for Sara to realize what she'd done. She blinked, her gaze focusing on the dead body of the cardinal.    
   
"Not likely."    
   
the moshae walked forward, glaring at the kett. "She deserved much worse." Sara glanced at her, nodding numbly. Jaal rejoined them and they moved forward. Sara let them go before her, glancing back at the facility before she followed.    
   
Would Alec agree? Would he be satisfied...? Sara shook her head, feeling the weight on her shoulders multiply, succumbing to the pain in her head as they head to the extraction point. Fighting off the remaining kett until the shuttle was able to extract them, the blizzard outside cutting into her suit. She jumped onto the shuttle then, firing off a few more rounds into a fiend that nearly trampled over them, until the facility was out of range. Sara took a few steps back, falling into a vacant seat at the back of the shuttle. She sighed, running a hand over her face, and brushing off the dried blood in the process. With the adrenaline running out, Sara felt a crippling pain shoot through her head, stinging at the back of her eyes. She winced, pressing the heel of her palms over her eyes. The ambient chatter of the shuttle was drowned out by the ringing in her head, and she mumbled something before she slipped into unconsciousness.   
   
 "SAM... tell Lexi we're gonna need two beds in the med bay ready..."  


	13. One Moment

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> character development is hell to write, or maybe it was just me. anyways there's a little tidbit of Sara's life before the initiative! with more to come, sadly she's got commitment issues and whole lot more drama because I'm a hoe for angst my friends.

_Sara sat in the sun, her back against the grass and her hair floating gently in the breeze. Gazing at the clouds without a care in the world...  
   
She was back on earth, near the alliance base in Vancouver. It was where she trained as an N7 for three years, until finally being able to deploy into the field. Despite her distaste for violence, she was good at it. She had friends there... a life... she was posted for another year before she was to report back to the citadel.    
   
Footsteps in the grass beside her caught her attention, turning to look behind her. A smile spread across her face, lifting up her left hand. "Michael..." Another hand took hers, matching rings on their fingers. The person sat beside her, leaning down just close enough to kiss....   
   
"Time to wake up Sara." _  
   
Sara shot up, gasping for air. she took a deep stuttering breath, running her hand over her face, ignoring the slight tremors going through them. Where was she? Where...?    
and suddenly, like it was nothing she was a million light years away, sitting on a cot in the med bay. There was no sun, no grass, and no... no Vancouver. Lexi came rushing to her side, her hands reaching out to touch her but Sara flinched away. Lexi halted, her brows furrowing but she put her hands down. Sara spoke first, her voice hoarse and raw. "What... happened."   
   
Lexi sighed, her expression becoming more tired than worried. "one of your L3 implants malfunctioned. It wasn't a total blow out but it was enough to cause harm." She sat on the edge of the bed. "You've only been out for a few hours... we were able to procure a suitable replacement so no worries... although I am concerned about your tactics in the field." Sara shook her head, trying to keep the bile in her throat down. "Not now Lexi... please...." Sara hadn't dreamed about him since.... since she left earth. Lexi hesitantly lifted her hand and placed it on Sara's scarred shoulder. "you were crying in your sleep... can I ask who Michael is?"    
Sara lifted her head from her hands, her eyes downcast as she tried to dry her eyes. "He... was my husband." Lexi's eyes widened, and she frowned. "Husband? I— ...was?"  Sara nodded straightening her composure and taking a deep breath. "He was. And he didn't follow me to Andromeda. It was a long time ago." Sara shook her head, tossing her thoughts to the side. It was probably nothing.    
   
Sara glanced at the doors, and then to lexi. "Where's the moshae?" Lexi nodded, accepting the act that Michael was painful to talk about, but made a mental note of it. "She is being treated by the resistance doctors before we take off, as our facilities are not as equipped at the moment. They should be boarding in a few minutes." Sara nodded slowly.    
   
"I should get dressed..."  Lexi stood and helped her get up, the bruises on her skin from the battle at the kett facility beginning to turn a deep purple, the gash on her forehead stitched up carefully. Sara steadied herself and gave lexi one last smile before she left the med bay. She was wearing one of her old t-shirts that was a bit too big and some old shorts, not exactly something to wear when you were still trying to broker an alliance with an alien race. But for now, for now, there was a minute to breathe... just breathe.   
   
 Stepping through the med bay doors she nearly walked right into Jaal. She let out a startled noise, green eyes widening as she took a step back. "Jaal...!"   
   
Jaal looked down at the pathfinder, surprised. When Cora hauled her off the shuttle after they got back she looked... well she was unconscious so already that was not good, but with blood dripping behind her in the snow... he was surprised she was up already. "Ryder! I did not expect you to be awake." She shrugged, laughing softly. "well, us humans are tougher than we look." She stepped aside, her humorous charade falling as she looked away. He saw the slight tremble in her hands as she cleared her throat. "I should... I-I should go. Should probably call Addison and Tann..." She spoke more to herself than to him, glancing up at him one last time before she bid him goodbye. "I'll probably talk to you later..." She paused for a moment, reaching to fiddle with something on her finger before her hands stilled. Her hands dropped to her sides and she spoke. "How is the moshae doing?"    
Jaal could tell when someone was anxious, or nervous even, but Sara didn't seem nervous.... she seemed... well, he didn't know what she seemed. He wasn't an expert on humans and their... ways of expressing emotions. Perhaps he should ask Liam. "She is doing better. Her spirits are high, and she is happy to be among friends. She is boarding in a few minutes." He tilted his head, brow furrowed and concern for the woman in front of him building in his chest. "Are you alright, Sara?"    
   
Sara lifted her gaze from the floor to the angara beside her, surprised he used her first name. Most of the shipmates called her pathfinder or Ryder, all titles that seemed... bigger than herself. He called her Sara, just... just Sara.    
   
Boy did she like that more than she should admit.    
   
Sara nodded, smiling slightly. "Yeah... I'll live." Jaal gave her a look that said he wasn't convinced. "you will live, yes, but are _you_ alright?" No, no she wasn't alright, she hadn't been alright, not for a long time. But she would smile and bear it if it meant home was on the horizon. She smiled, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. "Yes, Jaal. I'm fine. Thank you though, for caring to ask. I'll see you later." She bid him a brisk goodbye and walked down the corridor to her room. Before she walked through the doors jaal called out to her, making her smile.    
   
"I will be here, should you need me, Sara."    
   
Sara smiled,calling over her shoulder. "Thanks, Jaal."     
   
Jaal watched as she walked through the doors, he was curious about her before, and now even more so. He couldn't understand the need to hide your feelings, bury them under your skin until it was boiling and eating you alive... had she been an angara he would have thought she was hiding something, a liar.   
   
Yet she kept her promise and saved countless lives. She was brave and courageous and... so selfless. She didn’t share her emotions because she didn't want to be a burden, accepting everyone else's problems and her own. He had heard from liam that she had not been able to grieve properly for her father, he didn't know how truly troubled her mind must be. She stood in front of the Cardinal and spat in her face, and he had no doubt she would be a steadfast ally to the angara. Perhaps it was what they needed, what he needed.    
   
"Jaal?"    
   
He hadn’t realized he was staring at the doors to her quarters until lexi spoke. He straightened and turned to the doctor. "Ah yes, sorry. Are things prepared for the moshae?" Lexi nodded, but her eyes didn’t leave him, calculating. "Yes, things should be in order, at least until we can get her the proper care on Aya. We have emergency supplies should anything go wrong en route. We are prepared as well as we can be." Lexi gave him a smile, and jaal returned the gesture. "that’s good. I will tell the resistance we are ready then."    
   
Lexi nodded, but spoke before he could turn to leave. "She needs someone like you." Jaal frowned, puzzled. Lexi gestured in the direction of the Pathfinders quarters. "Sara. She's been on her own for a while, even before we came to Andromeda. She needs someone to lean on, and to tell her when she needs to lean." Jaal glanced at the doors  to her room, smiling slightly. "Yes, I keep hearing that. A stubborn one isn't she." Lexi's smile grew, and she nearly rolled her eyes.   
   
 "you have no idea."


	14. Returning

Sara locked herself in her quarters and didn’t actually get dressed until the Tempest took off from Voeld. She kinda just, sat there on the floor of her room. She had never been the one in charge, or the one to make big decisions... that was her father's job.    
   
A deep, wrenching sadness bubbled up from her chest... something she didn't quite understand. She was never close with Alec, she hated him for the longest time and then... her husband died and she had nothing... Alec had come to the funeral and he didn't try to be condescending or.. Anything. He had stood beside her, wrapped his arm around her shoulder and let her cry. She joined up with an alliance peacekeeping force after that, she half hoped it would have killed her. Space pirates and slavers were dangerous after all... one year after Alec had come to her with a proposition, come with him to the Andromeda galaxy. A new start sounded... far away, and impossible. She would be a researcher, part of his team discovering new planets and... it was perfect.    
   
Then they arrived and it all went so, so wrong... now Alec was dead too, because of her.    
   
Sara felt her gut twist, memories she thought she had left behind in the Milky Way resurfacing. The flashes of what happened on habitat 7 playing over in her mind.   
   
Choking, suffocating, dying...    
   
A click and then oxygen, sweet, sweet oxygen... her father's face looking down at her, deep breaths... deep breaths.    
Sara laid onto her side slowly, unfolding her knees from under her and bringing them up to her chest. She laid there until her heart stopped hammering in her chest, until the tears stopped flowing down her face.    
   
Only then did she get dressed.    
   
She forced herself to move, she had to talk to Tann, and probably Evfra... she snagged a datapad off her desk and left her quarters, making her way to the vidcom room. The heels of her boots snapped softly on the corridor floor, typing up an email to Tann as she walked, she wasn't in the mood to talk to him. She had to deal with Evfra though... maybe she would just send him an email too. She lifted her gaze from the data pad, halting in her footsteps, sighing softly.    
   
She still had to talk to the Moshae.    
   
Sara shook her head and finished typing up her email to Tann. What was she going to say, Hey got some time to chat about the weird terraforming network I can connect with? The woman had been through torture... she didn't exactly think now was the best time for it.    
   
Suddenly, like the gods themselves were somehow intent on screwing her over, the med bay doors opened and she was standing there like a fool. Damn the automatic door. She stared in shock at the door, a shot of anxiety rushing through her, oh god now she had to do something.  Luckily Jaal and the Moshae hadn't noticed, they were talking about the facility... a heavy subject, but Jaal looked happy... more comfortable at least, the familiarity he had with Moshae Sjefa made her ache for her family. By now that ache was familiar, or at least normal. Lexi looked up from her charts as Sara stepped into the med bay. The asari walked past her, to the other side of the room. "Go easy, she's in a fragile state."    
   
Moshae Sjefa looked up at that, blue eyes narrowing and following after Lexi. "Did she just call me frail...?" Sara shook her head, lips twitching in a hint of a smile. "Fragile," She cleared her throat, stuffing all her emotions back into the fucking hole they came from. "Do you feel up to some questions?"    
The Moshae tilted her head, eyes still narrowed. "Ah. So now you care what I have to say."  Sara clenched her jaw, a motion that would have seemed aggressive at face value. They didn't know about her little breakdown in her room minutes before, and she didn't want them to know. Her voice was strained as she spoke, but she held the moshae's piercing gaze.    
   
"I'm aware that you disagree with my choice but I," she paused for a moment, a lump burning in her throat as she tried to keep her emotions under control. Thankfully when she spoke again her voice held steady, sounding strong and firm. "I would do it again. If it meant saving all the lives we did."    
Jaal smiled from where he stood, setting a hand on her shoulder. It startled her for a moment, her gaze flickering from the Moshae to him. It occurred to her that she didn't... hadn't really been touched much aside from  combat. Not even a hug. But it was nice. Something familiar at least. She almost missed the warmth from his palm when he moved away. She looked back at the Moshae, who still had her eyes set on her, her voice sounded less hostile than before. "Jaal's told me about you. He says you're a pathfinder from the Milky Way."   
   
Tha angaran woman looked up at Jaal with a motherly sort of fondness, squeezing his hand. She turned her gaze back to Sara, resuming a professional demeanor. "What would you ask of me?"    
Sara kept her questions blunt and to the point, not wanting to bother her for longer than she needed. "That facility, what was that all about?"    
   
"They call it Exaltation." Moshae Sjefa sighed, her eyes turning dark. "They believe those they exalt are given a great gift."  Sara opened her mouth to speak but Jaal's voice made her pause.    
   
"A gift? They snatch us, defile and shatter us! Or the ones we love I... I can't..." His voice trailed off, too full of emotion to continue. Sara folded her arms, glancing back to the moshae as she spoke again.    
   
"It's a complex genetic construct—and interchange of traits that the kett use to advance their species."    
Sara's brow furrowed, chewing on her bottom lip, murmuring more to herself than anyone else. "So, they steal genes. Why?"    
Moshae Sjefa shook her head, leaning back on the cot into a more relaxed position. "Reproduction."  Jaal picked up on that thought, growling almost. "Domination, Tyranny... Annihilation."   Sjefa nodded, tilting her head, speaking gently.    
"Yes, and yet... the Archon didn't bring me to his ship to transform me. He wanted information. He showed me remnant tech, and tortured me when I wouldn't speak."    
   
Sara shook her head, rubbing her temples. "Of course the remnant would be involved." Moshae Sjefa sat up, with some help from jaal, she continued speaking. "He's obsessed, like you are. Yes, jaal told me. You rescued me hoping to get into Aya's vault." Sara nodded, she may have rescued her but she had no obligation to help.    
   
"Yes. These vaults are just a lead but... I need to make a home for my people, all of them. Failure isn't an option... I didn't travel millions of light years for that."  Sara could feel her throat beginning to tighten and she cleared her throat to alleviate the feeling which only made it worse. Moshae sjefa looked at her, her gaze softening. "emotion must never get in the way of science. I'll take you."    
Sara let out a soft, barely audible sigh. "Thank you."  Jaal nodded, helping her lay back down. "Yes, thank you Moshae Sjefa."  Sara nodded, taking a step back to leave. "Well, I'll let you rest. We have about 22 hours before we reach Aya."  the Moshae nodded, speaking before she left. "I'm happy to answer any questions you may have pathfinder, anytime."    
   
Sara nodded with a smile and left the med bay, hearing the doors slide shut behind her with a soft woosh. SAM spoke up on their private channel, directing her to a pending vidcall from Tann. Sara sighed, shaking her head and making her way to the vidcom room, a Pathfinders duty is never done.    
   
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   
   
 Sara never knew how soothing working on a car could feel.    
   
Shoved under the nomad for countless hours trying to do routine maintenance after it was shut up for months collecting dust wasn't exactly how she envisioned spending the trip to Aya, but hey, she wasn't complaining. Well, she was complaining about the heat, but not the work. Gil had taken to shouting encouragement from engineering, even tossing a water bottle her way every now and then.  Sara removed her shirt and tied it around her waist, eventually using it for a grease rag, thankfully her sports bra wasn't too thick and didn't leave her sweltering under the Nomad.    
   
She let out a soft groan, one of the metal fixtures had broken off and would needed to be soldered on. She rolled out from under the nomad, walking over to the box of tools they had on hand and fishing through them. She frowned, looking up at the doors to engineering. "Gil, where's the soldering iron?"  Gil offered an unhelpful 'I dunno' from the comms. Sara growled out a curse, letting out a frustrated sigh and leaning back against the table, wiping the grease from her hands off on her shirt.    
   
"Perhaps I could be of assistance?"    
   
Sara looked up, meeting Jaal's piercing blue eyes. She sighed, gesturing to the nomad. "yeah, if you'd like. C'mon I'll show you what's wrong." She walked over to the nomad as jaal descended from the galley. She started listing off the issues from it, just sitting in the radiation from Eos didn't really help, they needed it to be good to go should they need it again, and if Ryder was gonna be the one driving it she was gonna work on it dammit. She was just doing small repairs though, the nexus would take care of the rest when they next docked. She began talking as Jaal neared, placing her hands on her hips. "There's some issues with the boosters, and part of the metal lining underneath is falling apart. And life support is acting up... it'll be easier to show you."  she kicked up the nomad a bit more so jaal could fit underneath, it wasn't comfortable but they made it work. It helped that Sara wasn't too big.    
   
 Sara watched as Jaal scanned over the systems with his own, and after a few seconds he seemed to have found the problem. She propped herself up on her elbow, trying to get a  "what?? Already? No way, I've been working on this for three hours!" Jaal chuckled, glancing at her. "I'm sure you weren't working on this specific spot for that long. The life support and boosters are now," Grabbing two frayed wires that she didn't see before and twisting them together, Sara grabbed some electrical tape and taped over it while jaal held it steady. "fixed."    
   
Sara shook her head smiling. "we should do this more often." Jaal put the wires back into place and putting the metal mech back over them. "because of my skill with mechanics?" Sara shrugged, tilting her head as she looked down at him. "Not exactly."     
Jaal smiled slightly, letting his hands drop from the wires and looking up at her. Her hair was pinned up on her head and parts of it fell and framed her face. There was a smudge of grease on her cheek, and even more on her hands. She looked nothing like the woman he had seen on the battlefield, and yet they looked exactly the same.  "Because you enjoy spending time with me, as much as I do with you?"  Sara's brows shot up, if her cheeks weren't already red she would have been worried about embarrassing herself. "You do?"    
Jaal nodded. "there is something about you that's... fascinating. You are selfless and bold and... odd, yet... I want to know you better."    
She nodded slowly, chewing her bottom lip. "Yeah. I'd like that. Maybe not under the nomad though?"    
   
   
He cleared his throat softly, averting his gaze. "agreed."    
   
Kallo spoke over the comms, they would land on Aya in twenty minutes. Sara glanced away from him. "I should go. I gotta clean up. See you on Aya?"  Jaal nodded, giving her space to move. "Of course."  Sara grinned at him as she slid out from under the nomad. "see you later Jaal."


	15. Chasing the Archon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry if I'm not exactly focusing much on the story, as I feel that would take way too much time and effort to write. I'm really trying to flesh out the relationship I think Jaal and Sara would have before the romance, since in game its kinda like 'ohh do this quest and he likes you, flirt a few times and he loves you!' ya know?

Aya was beautiful.    
   
She didn't have the chance to appreciate the view on her first visit, considering she was surrounded by guards with her ship on fire. But now she was able to drink it all in, and it was breathtaking.    
   
The welcome she received bringing the Moshae back was such a contrast to when she first arrived, which was understandable, but it was still a shocking difference. Already she had three children run up to her and hug her, one of them refused to move for five minutes, which was fine except Sara's legs began getting that pins and needles feeling. Luckily the kid let go when their parents called, and Sara was left alone again.    
She had visited Ayas vault, and left with more questions than answers. this 'Meridian' was the heart of all the vaults, hypothetically, but would it really help them? She had no time for doubting it, and she trusted Moshae Sjefa, so she was going to see this through. Then she had to hear that one of the resistance members betrayed them and subsequently led to the Moshae's capture, and was hiding out on a planet filled with initiative exiles and scavengers.    
   
But for the moment, she was alone and it was quiet. Gazing out into the more volatile area of the planet, she let out a soft, tired sigh. She wasn't ready for any of this, how could she be? With the other arks still missing she was the Pathfinder for every race that came to Andromeda, and that was a lot of people to guide. She watched as the creatures that flew the skies on Aya and Havarl slowly drifted on the air currents in front of her, content with watching the sun set behind the mountains, a cool breeze gently lifting her hair from her shoulders.    
   
"I figured I would find you here."    
   
A familiar voice made her turn her head, meeting Jaals gaze. "Oh? How's that?" Jaal walked up beside her, leaning against a pole supporting the canopy above them. "this is the best view from the city, and Evfra saw you over here earlier. It is one of my favorite spots on Aya. We take turns living here, I'm sure you can see why."    
"I can. It is a beautiful place." Sara watched him carefully, he seemed more at ease here than on the tempest, there was a certain sparkle in his eye that made a warm feeling bubble up in her chest. She quickly looked away from him, returning her gaze to the horizon. "You're happy here, more relaxed."    
   
Jaal nodded, glancing at her. "I am..." She was utterly unique, the way the light reflected off the green of her iris, so different from the familiar blue hue all angara shared. The oddity that her hair was when they first met was replaced with a newfound curiosity, how could something so... simple, make her seem so ethereal? He had noted that none of the other human crew had such a stark, contrasting hair color, and it made him even more curious about her. He returned his gaze to the scenery around him, clearing his through softly. "Thank you for noticing."     
Sara eyed him out of the corner of her eye, smiling. "I like to notice." She glanced down at her hands, a question that had been gnawing at her since they landed back on aya finally spilling from her mouth.    
   
"So, what will you do now?"    
   
Jaal folded his hands in front of him, he had asked himself that question ever since he first volunteered to join her crew, however temporary the position may be... and he found himself wanting to stay with her. Not only because he found she was excellent company, now that he trusted her, but because she was doing something important. For both of their peoples, and it seemed only right that one of his people be beside her, helping as they could.    
At least that's what he told Evfra. The resistance commander wasn't too fond of having his best lieutenant out of commission but in the end he agreed. His only worry was that Ryder would not want him, he was kind of forced on her team, and her crew was still wary of his intentions. What better way to earn their trust by fighting alongside them?    
   
"I would like to continue traveling with you. If you will have me."     
   
Whatever Sara expected him to say, it was not that. She looked over at him in surprise. "you— I-I mean yeah, you're always welcome on my ship. I just... didn't know if you wanted to stay?" She was fumbling with her words now, her cheeks turning a light shade of red in embarrassment. "I would have asked but I didn't know if that would, overstep my bounds or anything and I just— I... It would be great to keep you on my team." She offered a small smile, hoping to whatever god was out there that he couldn't tell she was making afool of herself. Jaal laughed, looking relieved. "Thank you... I will see you back on the tempest then?"    
   
Sara nodded. "Yeah. Speaking of which, I should go make sure Gil is done with repairs... I'll see you later Jaal."    
   
Jaal watched as she left... and he found himself smiling. She was cute when she blushed.    
   
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   
   
After one visit to the outlaw port known as Kadara, Sara was officially in need of a drink.    
   
After they spent a week there trying to solve the planets many problems, Sara gave up on getting wasted in favor of shooting down outlaws and at one point, Kett. On the first day there they had met with Evfra's resistance contact, a smooth smuggler named Reyes Vidal, extracted information from Vhen Terev on how he got his orders, got the Kett transponder, powered it back up and in doing so got the location of the Archons ship. that was supposed to be that, until Addison kept pestering her about more outposts. they already had two, Voeld and Eos, and apparently it was more important than fixing the entire galaxy. in the end though Sara understood and relented under the pressure. Thus the reason they spent the rest of the week trying to wrangle Kadara into a place fit for an initiative outpost.     
   
Today though, she was extra stressed. perhaps it was the growing tension between the Outcasts and the Collective, or maybe she had been around the sulfur lakes for too long. She could handle a hotheaded outlaw leader and her group of thugs, hell she could even handle Reyes' shenanigans, but maybe she was pushing herself too far. It had been a long day, with even longer fights. After finally resetting Kadara's vault, just as they were heading back to port, they were ambushed.    
   
All in all it was a pretty flawless execution, attacking from the mountains above instead of being on the ground. Sara hadn't expected it, though in hindsight, foolish to think impossible on a planet full of thugs.   
She had cut the wheel so hard she drifted, forcefully enough to slam into three of the outlaws and knocked em on their asses. Drack and Jaal were out of the vehicle before she was, using the nomad as cover to start firing. Sara dove out of the car, her avenger already in hand and firing.    
   
She took out the outlaws she knocked down with ease, using her biotics to hurl herself into the air briefly before slamming down onto them with a charged nova. Drack charged in beside her, for the most part it was going smoothly, at least until the Krogan berserker charged in. Drack was preoccupied and the krogan was heading straight for Jaal on his sniping perch. So Sara did the only logical thing she could do and punched him in the face with her entire body.    
The biotic charge threw the krogan off course and into the lake beside them, unfortunately lacking its toxic properties since Sara fixed it. But the berserker didn't know that. He panicked for a good minute, so Sara took the opportunity and nailed in a few good hits before finishing him off with a melee attack.    
   
She faintly heard Jaal call out from his perch above them, but it was too late.    
   
The bullet hit her shoulder, she hadn't seen the sniper on the ridge of the rocks overhead, she assumed that’s what Jaal was warning. She stumbled into cover, but not before another bullet connected with her thigh, her vulnerable position making the gaps in her armor a prime target. the bullet that hit her shoulder had shattered her pauldron and went deep into the muscle, sending spasms of pain through her arm. "Fuck!"    
Jaal glanced down from where he was perched, his eyes widening at the blood he saw spatter the ground. "Ryder is hit!" Another bullet would have hit her if Jaal hadn't dove to her side, the bullet ricocheting of his armor. Drack glanced at them, cursing as he saw Sara start to sag, that was too much blood. Drack growled into his comm, "Tempest we're gonna need a quick extraction!!"    
   
After that Sara had zoned out, her heartbeat thrumming in her ears, pushing her hands onto the wound on her thigh to keep from losing more blood than she already had. She was vaguely aware of being carried back onto the tempest, and only really came back to reality just as Lexi was digging the bullet out of her shoulder.   
   
"fucking shit, that's one hell of a wake up call—" Sara stifled her cry of pain as Lexi  pulled out the bullet, her armor having been tossed upon arrival in the med bay leaving her in her bra and shorts that she wore under her armor. Lexi had thankfully ushered the rest of the squad out before she had done so, and by the worried glare that the doctor was giving her, they gave her a fuss.    
   
"I should hope so. You pushed yourself too hard today."    
   
Lexi mused as she stitched up the wounds, careful to be easy but not too gentle, she was still cross with her. Getting so beat up in a small skirmish like that.... Lexi worried for her, without a proper support system and outlet, the emotional baggage the pathfinder dragged around would explode eventually. She was going to need a rather large dose of medi gel, if the growing welt on her stomach from her tangle with the krogan berserker was anything to go by. Lexi applied the medi gel before she moved onto stitching up her thigh, the bullet didn't enter, but it did leave a deep gash. She worked in silence before she spoke again, glancing up at her. "this isn't like you, Sara. You are precise and analytical. Is... is it because of that dream you had? Are you sleeping? You don't have to go through these things alone Sara. you know that."    
   
"Oh don't start please, Lexi. I just been shot aren't you s'posed t'be worried?" Sara groaned, rubbing at her eyes; Lexi made a mental note of the growing dark circles under her eyes, giving her a silent answer to her previous question. How long had it been since they landed on Kadara? A week? Given the slight slur to her speech the medi gel was kicking in, maybe that would help. Lexi sighed, shaking her head. "You'll be fine. We are heading back to the Nexus shortly, where the tempest and the nomad will get much needed repairs and you, will recuperate and get some sleep."    
Sara sighed, defeated and uninterested in arguing, whether it was from the medi gel or the sensitive topic of her emotional state lexi could only guess. Once she was done with patching her up, she put her arm in a sling and sent her straight to her room. "SAM, make sure the pathfinder stays off her feet, that leg won't heal with her standing on it."    
   
"Of course, Dr. T'Perro."    
   
Once Sara was behind closed doors she tossed on the nearest clean shirt she could find, grabbed a blanket and collapsed onto the small couch in her room, letting out a satisfied sigh. She knew lexi would fuss, and she probably should talk to someone about all of her shit, but hell if she was gonna do it now. She opened her omni-tool with a flick of her fingers, sending a message to Vetra, via the private messaging on the crew message board.    
   
   
_[Ryder] Hey V, you know if our good doc confiscated all the alcohol on hand after the incident with Liam and Drack?_  
   
Sara thought on it, and the answer was most likely yes. Liam had gotten a bottle of something wicked and somehow convinced drack to headbutt him, most likely because Drack found Ryncol on Kadara, nearly sending him flying from the research room to the cockpit.  A dark day for the tempest crew, as Lexi issued a ban on booze for the time they were docked in Kadara, and confiscated every last ounce of alcohol on board. Technically there wasn't supposed to be any in the first place, but what happens while docked in Kadara, stays in Kadara.    
A soft ping and a purple 'V' icon appearing on the screen of her omni-tool told signaled the arrival of a new message from her turian friend.    
   
_[Nyyxx] don't tell lexi but I've got a few bottles from a supplier on port, something called Rocky Mountain Moonshine? And some dextro stuff for me. I heard you got pretty banged up and are on bed rest or something. You need me to smuggle it over to you?_  
   
Sara sighed, exclaiming in triumph. "hell yes!" She suddenly glanced over at SAM 's router, glaring at the AI. "If you snitch, we aren't friends anymore."  SAM replied, sounding almost offended.  
   
"I do not 'snitch' pathfinder. I see no reason to alert Dr. T'Perro as you are not walking there yourself."    
   
Sara smiled, turning back to her omni-tool. "Thanks SAM."    
   
_[Ryder] Would you? SAM says we won't tell so long as I don't get up myself and get it._  
   
_[Nyyxx] Sure thing, need anything else? I've got blast-O's and something called pop tarts? Im assuming it’s a human thing, Liam insisted I look for them last time I was out but he's being particularly bratty._    
   
_[Ryder] oohh! What flavor?_   
   
_[Nyyxx] Something called 's'mores'?_    
   
_[Ryder] HELL YEAH bring em. you wouldn't happen to have a therapist hiding in the cargo bay somewhere would you?_    
   
_[Nyyxx] Sadly no. Lexi get on you about emotional stuff again?_    
   
_[Ryder] in a sense. according to Cora she's really been chiding everyone about it. I'm okay though, aside from being shot in two different places._     
   
_[Nyyxx] You know alcohol is a mood enhancer right? If you feel shitty to begin with you're gonna feel even worse._    
   
_[Ryder] Ehhh I'll be fine._    
   
_[Nyyxx] I've gotta track down some new parts for the nomad, so i'm sending the stuff with Jaal, he's going that way anyways. you should really try to not run over human sized things next time, it's hell on the bumper._   
   
_[Ryder] I didn't run them over, just gave them a little tap. thanks again V, you're a lifesaver._    
   
Sara set shut off her omni-tool after that, she always felt more relaxed after talking with Vetra, even if it was just messaging her. How the hell she got poptarts though, is a mystery even to her. She laid in relative silence until the telltale ping of someone at her door that signaled the arrival of her 'contraband'. She opened it with a flick of her fingers across her omni tool, waving to Jaal from her spot on the couch.    
Jaal gave her a smile, holding up a small bag. "Vetra said you asked for some things. I take it Lexi scolded you again?" Sara shrugged, positioning herself so she sat up a little better on her couch and waved him in. "Eh, not so much as scolding. Guess she got tired of me."  Jaal walked into the room and handed her the bag. "She also may have mentioned something about your mood and emotional state."    
Sara shrugged, pulling the bottle of booze from the bag with a careful sort of reverence. "Yeah, I guess so. It's a long story though, and I wouldn't want to trouble anyone. You guys have got your own problems, don't need to hear my whining."     
Jaal was silent for a moment, and Sara realized he wasn't wearing his visor, and seemed to be in more comfortable clothes different from his armor. He still had his little cloak thing though, so not much else changed. Perhaps since he was more comfortable around them he didn't need to be as guarded anymore. After a few seconds he spoke, a tone that was inviting, reminding Sara that it was boring to drink alone.    "I have time, if you want to share anything. I did say I wanted to get to know you better."    
   
Sara looked up at  him for a moment before she sighed, shrugging her shoulders. "Ah, what the hell. C'mon, sit down. " she tucked her uninjured leg underneath her, keeping the other in a more careful relaxed position, and patted the spot beside her. Jaal took a seat, making himself comfortable as she began talking. "Okay, so you remember I told you about my brother right?"    
Jaal nodded, and she picked up on the thought. "Okay well, he's only my younger brother by like a minute, we're twins. So naturally we do everything together, or did rather. I'm not used to not having him beside me, it feels..." She fell short on the right word, making vague gestures with her hands as she tried to find it. Jaal spoke softly then. "Alien. Strange.."    
Sara nodded, glancing at him for a brief moment before she opened the bottle of booze and took a swig. Damn that shit was strong. But the familiar burning sensation as she swallowed was comforting, and gave her the courage to continue.    
   
"for lack of a better term, yeah... I was never meant to do this. I didn't come to Heleus to be a Pathfinder or be some sort of savior..."    
   
Jaal frowned, tilting his head, brows scrunched together. "what did you come here to be then?"    
Sara chuckled at that, leaning back against the arm of the couch so she faced him. "I came here to be a scientist. A fucking field researcher. Science had always been my calling, I only joined the military because my father expected me to, but I continued for the science. Hell, if I had known I would have been running around doing impossible things when my dad..." She trailed off on that, her father. She felt tears sting her eyes and turned her gaze to the wall, clenching her jaw and taking another swig from the bottle. Jaal watched her, the way her expression tightened when she spoke of her father, it was clear his passing had caused her immense pain.    
   
"You do not speak of your father often."    
   
Sara looked back at him, scoffing softly and shaking her head. "No... no I don't... shit." The tears fell before she could stop them, and she turned her face, quickly wiping them away. "ugh, sorry...I'm not usual this emotional."    
Jaal immediately spoke up, his frown growing. "why would you apologize for crying?" Sara shrugged, waving her hand. "Bah, I dunno... humans, we don’t really... we don’t really handle our emotions well? Crying is sometimes seen as weak and I just... I hate crying in front of people... so I guess you're the first of the crew to see me cry."    
   
Jaal nodded, slowly beginning to understand. "You can cry around me, Sara. I do no think you are weak for doing so."  She smiled, letting out a half laugh. "Thanks Jaal... anyways... back to my father."   
Talking about her father obviously made her sad, and Jaal did not want her to feel like she needed to tell him.    
"you don't have to tell me if it makes you upset."    
   
Sara waved him off. "Nah, it's fine..." She cleared her throat softly before she spoke again.    
   
"When we first arrived in Heleus, we had no contact with the nexus. So protocol states with no communication between the nexus or the other arks we had to go to our designated golden worlds. Habitat 7 was supposed to be the golden world for humanity."     
   
she took a steadying breath before she continued.    
   
"the planet was horrific. Volatile lightning storms and the air was toxic. The shuttle I was on got struck by lightning and split in two, sending me and Liam in a free fall at least a thousand feet in the air. Luckily we had our jump jets so we didn't get too hurt... I'll always have a reminder of that day."    
She gestured to her left arm, the scars that branched out in a way no weapon could ever make marking her skin forever. Jaal had wondered how she got them, now he knew.   
   
"We eventually found the rest of our people, Kirkland died though. The Kett got him before we could get to him. My dad was pathfinder at the time, and that’s when we first discovered the monoliths. The only way my dad could stop the storms was to interface with the monolith directly and it..."  Sara swallowed past the lump in her throat, a vivid flashback of being thrown off the remnant architecture playing in her head. She set the bottle on the table as her hands started to shake, she never really voiced what happened to her out loud...    
Jaal wanted to comfort her, but he wasn't quite sure how... what was too much for her? Should he say something? Pushing past his doubts he spoke, repeating the same words she had said to him after the Kett facility on Voeld. "I may look tough, but I have a good shoulder."    
   
Sara looked up at him, tears spilling onto her cheeks and a soft laugh bubbling up from her chest. "Hey that’s my line." Jaal shrugged, smiling and holding out his arms. "It goes both ways." Sara considered for a moment, gauging if he was serious or not. When he didn't object or voice that it was a joke or something, she moved closer to him, settling in a comfortable position and being careful with her injuries. She hadn't been this close to anyone in a long time, and it was so much better than sitting alone, the man practically radiated warmth. If she weren't wearing very short shorts she would have tossed her blanket off all together. She let out a shaky sigh before continuing.    
   
"Interfacing with the monolith made it unstable I guess, and it blew me and my father off the platform. My helmet shattered,"  she ran a hand through her hair, shutting her eyes as more tears fought their way to the surface. "And my father gave me his helmet, so that I could live... he transferred SAM to me just before he died... hell, I was technically dead for twenty two seconds. When I wake up, my dad's dead and I'm the pathfinder and..."  She choked on a sob, covering her face with her hand. She spoke through tears, her voice so laden with emotion that Jaal almost felt like he was going to cry. "Gods, I don't know what I'm doing."    
   
Jaal set his hand gently on her back, causing her to look up at him. He spoke softly but sternly, holding her gaze. "You may not have come here to lead, but that doesn't mean you can't do it. Just look at Eos, you did that Sara. You give people hope, you don’t need to be perfect."    
She was quiet for a moment, looking up at him with an unreadable expression on her face. "can I hug you?"    
   
Jaal was puzzled, but answered. "Yes?"    
   
"Good," She said, and hugged him as best she could with one arm in a sling. "Because that was the most inspiring thing anyone has said to me since I've been in this galaxy."    
   
Jaal laughed softly, ignoring the jump of his pulse when she touched him, the little buzz under his skin that confused him. He hadn’t felt that in a long time. "I try. Now you should rest before we reach the Nexus."  Sara nodded, relinquishing her hold on him. "You're right. Thanks for the talk. Next time you do the talking though."  he laughed a little louder this time, standing from his spot on the couch. "very well. Tomorrow then, if you have the time?"    
   
Sara shrugged, calling out as he headed to the door. "Sure thing big guy. See you later." She waved to him as he left, locking the door once he left. It was strange to get that off her chest, but... maybe Lexi was right... she didn't have to be alone anymore.  


	16. Confessions

Honestly, Sara had every intention of keeping the Tempest docked at the Nexus for a few days, she really did. She was going to take it easy and stay off her feet, let her wounds heal properly without the use of cybernetics.    
   
Well, that was the plan.    
   
Thinking back on it, Sara supposed there were a multitude of things she could have done to avoid the situation she was in; a deadly game of truth or dare in the vortex with Peebee, Cora, Gil and Vetra, Peebee's idea of course. Sara could have been doing anything else, but things weren't exactly peachy.    
   
Apparently when you're the Pathfinder you don't get time to take a load off to make sure your mental state isn't on the verge of shattering. As soon as she set foot off the tempest, she was swarmed by crowds of people eager to get more information; _'was there a new outpost? Did the angara really ally with us? Pathfinder!'_  
   
Then of course Tann had more for her to do, and that was the end of her shore leave. Apparently not even a doctors note could save her from this shitshow... could probably get her out of a few meetings though.    
   
To add to her growing list of stressors, SAM found a way to talk to Scott. Sara had stayed in the med bay for hours, pacing back and forth. She needed to talk to him, to hear his voice and know that he was okay, he was alive... but... she just couldn't tell her brother all of this. Not yet... she wasn't even ready to deal with them herself, there was no way he was going to be able to process it all. So she left, she would talk to Scott later, and... maybe this would be better discussed when he was awake.    
   
Sara arrived back on the tempest to deliver the bad news, no rest for the wicked, or in this case the drunk and disorderly. Lexi was not pleased, and insisted they stay docked until the morning, that way the crew could get at least a little break. Sara wasn't about to argue with the woman that had saved her life on multiple occasions, so they stayed.    
With the crew in a relaxed state, and eager for some rest, Peebee was the opposite. Which ultimately led to this hazardous game that Sara had been roped into playing. Peebee had dared Gil to get up on the stage and start singing, to which Gil had to go all out.    
   
He was currently belting out the notes to a song from an old as hell musical from earth, Les mis-something... he wasn't doing too bad either. After the song ended the bar erupted in applause, Gil bowing graciously and hadning the mic off to someone else. He walked back to the table with a overly confident swagger to his step, waggling his eyebrows at Peebee.    
   
"Told you I could  do it."    
   
Peebee took a sip of her drink, nodding appreciatively. "Indeed you did, my good sir. Alright Gil, it's your turn." Gil looked around the table, an evil glint to his eye that made Sara uneasy. It was like back in grade school when you were silently praying the teacher didn't call on you, except with alcohol and an actual reputation to protect. Gil's predatory gaze finally settled on Cora, to which the woman let out an irritated sigh. Gil cackled menacingly, getting more comfortable in his chair. "Truth or Dare, lieutenant."    
   
   
Cora hummed softly as she sipped her drink. "Dare." she had been choosing truth all night so it was a bit of a surprise, though by the number of shots she had it shouldn't have been. Gil pumped his fist in the air, laughing. "Alright, yes!" He set his gaze on the rest of the bar patrons, finally setting his sights on an unsuspecting Kandros. Gil grinned, folding his hands on the table.    
"I dare you to go hit on Kandros. And you've gotta mean it, no cheap pick up lines or shit like that. All in." Cora glanced at Kandros, and then back to Gil, puffing her cheeks. "Fine."    
   
She stood up and walked over to the bar, ordered something and then began chatting with the turian. Vetra was sitting in the corner of the booth, snickering as she watched. Cora said something and Kandros laughed, which made Vetra sit up straighter. "Holy shit you guys it's working! See the way his mandibles just flared..?" Gil covered his mouth to keep his laughter down. Peebee leaned over to get a better look, maybe looking a little to obvious. Cora left the bar with a triumphant smile on her face, easing back into the booth, shoving peebee over with her hips. She waved a piece of paper in Gil's face triumphantly.    
   
"I got his number. Take that, Brodie."    
   
Gil snatched the piece of paper from her, glaring at the text. "Damn. You actually did it." He set the paper aside, holding his hands up in defeat. "You got me Cora, your turn!"    
   
Sara ordered another of whatever it was she was drinking, not really paying attention to the little group around her. She took a sip of her remaining drink, feeling pleasantly buzzed, but coherent enough to hear cora say her name.    
Sara lifted a brow, looking back at her to be sure she heard right. "Me?" Cora nodded, twirling the little umbrella that came in her drink. "yuuup. Truth or dare, Sara."    
   
Sara didn’t feel like making a fool of herself just yet, so she went the safe route and took another drink. "Truth."    
   
Cora smiled, absentmindedly toying with the umbrella. "You've been hanging around Jaal a lot."  Sara paused, lifting her gaze to gauge the rest of the tables reaction. "Was that the question?" Cora tilted her head, her earlier statement garnering the attention of all present. Peebee made a soft 'oooohhhh' sound, the kind that Scott used to make when she got in trouble. Sara shot her a glare, taking another sip of her drink. "yeah we've talked... a bit." Cora smiled knowingly, shrugging.    
   
"so are you two dating yet or what."    
   
Sara nearly choked, setting her drink down before she dropped it. "E-excuse me?"    
   
The table erupted into a fit of snickers, peebee pointing at her cheeks. "Awww lookit her, all bushing and bashful! C'mon we've all seen it, you two under the nomad, chilling out on Aya... hell, you've practically been on two dates already, huh?"  Gil nodded, nudging her with his elbow. "He practically carried you back onto the tempest the other day when you got picked full of bullets."  Sara glared at him, rolling her eyes. "It was two bullets... and I don't think fixing the nomad or talking on Aya were dates, you guys are reading into things..."    
   
Vetra groaned from her spot, waving her hand. "C'mon, do you really think I sent him to your room with booze because he was closer? His room is the tech lab for spirits sake."    
Cora's eyes widened, laughing softly. "so there is more than meets the eye!" Peebee nodded in agreement, waggling her eyebrows in a suggestive manner. "Oh I'm sure there's a lot that we don't see, I suspect we might hear it though." She pouted, sighing wistfully. "Pity too, I hoped I would get first dibs on that mountain of angaran muscle and..." She made a grabby motion with her hands, embarrassing Sara further. She groaned, shaking her head, her cheeks burning red. Cora snickered, flicking the umbrella at Sara. "C'mon Ryder you gotta answer!"    
   
She sighed, running her hand through her hair. "we're not dating."  Cora looked at her expectantly, gesturing for he to continue. "And?"  Sara glared at her, flicking the flimsy umbrella back at her. "And I answered the question." Cora shook her head, waving her hand.    
"No, no, no, you gotta give us more than that, c'mon." She glanced at the rest of the crew around her. "You guys wanna know more right? Sara, we're your friends, you're supposed to tell us these things!"  Peebee and Vetra raised their glasses in agreement, and Gil shrugged. "She's right ya know." Sara shook her head, swishing her drink around in her glass. "Fine, alright... I like him. He's really sweet."     
   
The table was silent for a moment, just a moment though. Peebee snorted, bursting into a fit of laughter, nearly falling over onto Vetra's lap. "The glorious pathfinder has a crush, oh my god, that's rich!"    
   
Sara covered her face with her hands, shaking her head. "oh my god."    
   
That garnered attention from some of the bar patrons, Sara was sure she saw a reporter amongst them. She practically hissed at her 'friends', slinking low into her seat. "I hate you all...."    
The chatter died down after that, and the bar began clearing out, but Sara could still see people glancing over at her and whispering. It made her paranoid. They had dropped the truth or dare game after Sara refused to give them an answer, and Dutch ended up cutting peebee off after she took her shirt off insisting it was 'too hot for clothes.'    
   
After that Gil and Vetra, being the decidedly more sober of the group decided it was time to head back for the night, which Sara had no problem with. She was eager to get some sleep.    
   
The trip back to the tempest was quiet, save for the illegible signing from peebee, who was draped across vetra's shoulders. The lights had been dimmed to mimic nightfall, at least on this part of the nexus. The tempest was quiet too, aside from the chatter from the research room. Liam, Suvi and Jaal were still awake it seems.    
   
That was... just great.    
   
Sure, she liked Jaal. A lot. And maybe he liked her too but... she came with shit ton of emotional drama, and not to mention that he wouldn't just be getting her, he would get SAM too. They were a package deal now. She didn't know how he would feel about that. Hell, she wasn't even sure she was ready for a relationship. Flirting was easy and harmless, but she didn't want to make the situation... messy. Her last relationship was almost poetically tragic, and since then she had been alone. Sure she had flings and one night stands, those were simple; have fun.  But once you rope feelings into it, it gets complicated.     
   
Peebee just wouldn't let it go, apparently the fact that the Pathfinder was a blushing schoolgirl around these things was soooo hilarious.    
   
"hey, hey, Ryder, d'you always get so red in the face when you talk about your sex life?"    
   
Sara glared at Peebee. "What sex life?"  

Peebee snorted, rolling her eyes as they took the lift up to the research room. "That's sad! You've got your boy toy wandering around why don’t you just..."  she made a rude gesture and a sound that only belonged in a porno. Sara rolled her eyes, hissing through her teeth. "Would you shut up?!"   Peebee didn't even look like she was paying attention, continuing to let out ridiculously exaggerated  moans. Sara wouldn't have cared much, but they were entering the research room and Peebee had started throwing Jaals name into it.    
   
_"Mhm yes, Jaa—"_  
   
Sara clamped her hand over Peebee's mouth, hissing at her. "Peebee shut it!! Please, please, just be quiet!!" Peebee's voice was muffled by her hand, but the fake moaning had gotten more than just Jaal's attention.   
It must have been quite the spectacle, Liam started laughing, and Suvi seemed to be at least interested. Vetra chuckled, shaking her head. "She'll forget your big secret by tomorrow, Ryder."    
Vetra put emphasis on the words big secret, which was impossibly worse than peebee belting it out in front of everyone. Sara relinquished her hold on peebee, who had begun to half murmur half sing something about love and crushes, holding her hand to her chest in mock offense. "Betrayed by my own crew."    
   
Vetra continued carrying peebee back to the crews quarters, calling over her shoulder. "You should say something before you miss your chance Ryder!"    
Sara glared as the turian walked through the doors. "Traitors, the whole lot of you."     
   
Liam glanced at her, leaning on the research table. "So... should we ask why peebee sounded like one of those cheap porno vids?"    
   
Sara threw her hands in the air, shaking her head. "I'm going to bed, goodnight!" And with that, she jumped down from the walkway to the cockpit and entered her room, locking the door behind her.    
   
"Pathfinder, you have new email."   
   
Sara grumbled to herself, walking over and flopping down on her chair. "Fan-fucking-tastic. Probably tann trying to lecture me on proper protocol or... something." She was too tired to deal with that shit right now.    
   
"Actually," SAM said, his audio-output on a lower frequency than usual. "It seems to be from Jaal."    
   
Sara shot up and opened the email terminal, her eyes scanning the page.    
   
_'Dearest,_  
   
In your culture, is 'dearest' too strong a word to use when two people are fond of each other? And is 'fond' too strong a word to use when two people enjoy flirting with each other?'    
   
Her heart stuttered in her chest. Her eyes flicked back up to the top, re-reading the word... she quickly jumped back to her spot and continued reading.    
   
_'I enjoy you. Even now, I smile picturing your face.Angara are free with their emotions, and it feels normal for me to lay mine at your feet. I hope this is not too strange for your species and that you can comfortably accept them. I enjoy you— but more than that, I adore your strength and courage and beauty._  
   
Your dearest,    
Jaal'    
   
"Pathfinder your heart rate has increased rapidly, should I call Dr. T'Perro?"    
   
Sara shook her head, unable to shake the stupid smile off her face. "No.. No SAM im fine..." Sara chewed the inside of her cheek, her fingers lingering over the keyboard. Hell, what was she going to say? She recalled Vetra's words from earlier, and she was right... this was her chance so now or never.    
   
Sara sat up a little straighter and began typing. Once it was done she quickly read it over and before she could chicken out hit the send button. Gods, it was like highschool all over again, her heart thumping in her chest, so loud she feared others would hear. she stood up with a sigh, heading to her bed as she shimmied out of her pants.  "Alright, I'm going to bed for real now SAM."    
   
"Goodnight, Pathfinder."    
   
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   
   
That was certainly odd, Jaal thought.   
   
He had never really seen Peebee so... inebriated. He wasn't quite sure what the asari was doing, but Peebee wasn't the person who had his attention.  Recently, whenever he saw Sara... his heart would swell with... something he wasn’t sure he would ever feel again. Liam and Suvi had gone to bed shortly after Sara did, and Jaal resigned to the tech lab. He wasn't tired, how could be be? He practically shoved his feelings for her into and email and sent it. He felt like a child, it was silly, he should have just told her.    
Jaal began absentmindedly tinkering on something, putting his anxiety and frustration out on whatever it was he was working on.    
Feeling.... something like this for someone, was almost as strange as it was familiar. He honestly didn't think it was possible to feel this for another person after... he swallowed hard, setting down his tools and leaning back in his chair. He wouldn't dwell on the past... not anymore.    
   
A ping from his omnitool made him jump, a swell of adrenaline bursting through his system. Was it from her? He hesitated, doubt seeping into his thoughts. What if she … didn't feel the same...? He opened the new email with shaking hands, his heart jumping into his throat as he read.    
   
_'Jaal,_  
   
Dearest is probably too strong for right now, but I don't mind, it's cute. I'm definitely fond of you, and... I look forward to seeing where this goes.     
   
I'm not entirely sober, so I probably shouldn't be writing this but it's true. I really do like you andddd I'm probably going to feel really foolish in the morning because I'm drunk and terrible with these kinds of things. It''s been... a while since my last relationship, and it didn't end well. So here I am, throwing my feelings out there. I care about you, and... I hope you feel the same.    
   
Sara.'    
   
With a relieved sigh, Jaal sat back in his chair, a smile breaking over his features. He laughed softly to himself, running a hand over his face. What are the chances... she travels millions of lightyears to a different galaxy, and... somehow cares for him. It was almost impossible, and for a moment he feared this was a dream, but then there was another ping at his omnitool that pulled him from his thoughts.    
   
His smile faded, an unpleasant weight settling in his gut. His eyes scanned the page, reports of Roekaar and Akksul. He sighed, setting the report aside. He would have to bring this to the Pathfinders attention at once.    
   
 


	17. the Archon's Flagship

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is what happens when I watch too much parks and rec ok

"Alright. Who broke it. I'm not mad, I just want to know."    
   
Lexi sighed, shaking her head.  "I did. I broke it."    
   
"No. No, you didn't. Liam?"    
   
"Don't look at me. Look at Vetra."    
   
Vetra scoffed. "What? I didn't break it." "    
   
"Huh. That’s weird. How did you even know it was broken?"    
   
"Because it's sitting right in front of us and it's broken!"    
   
"Suspicious."    
   
"No, no it's not."   
   
Sara let out a weary sigh, it was impossible to get any work done like this. After they left the nexus, they headed to Havarl to establish a science team to help out the Moshae's team of scientists.  She was sitting in the vidcom room having a conference with a few of the crew members about the current outposts and... Something else. She forgot after Drack had walked into the room holding a broken coffee maker.    
Which led to a debate about the damn thing.    
   
Gil cleared his throat, raising his hand slightly. "If it matters, probably not... Peebee was the last one to use it."    
   
Peebee snorted. "Liar. I don’t even drink coffee!"    
   
Gil folded his arms, staring at her pointedly. "Oh yeah, then what were you doing in the kitchen earlier?"    
She threw her hands up, exclaiming. "Everyone knows I use the half dead batteries for my projects!"    
   
Lexi spoke up again, setting her hands on the vidcom table. "Let's not fight. I broke it, let me replace it."  Drack shook his head, insistent on finding the culprit. "No. Who broke it."    
   
Liam glanced around non-chalantly, glancing at Cora. "Cora's been pretty quiet."    
   
Cora threw her hands in the air, letting out an exasperated sigh. "Oh, Really?!"    
   
"Yeah, really!"    
   
Sara groaned, rubbing her temples. "I'm leaving, figure this out on your own." Sara grabbed her data pad off the table and walked down the stairs, she had better things to do than worry about a broken coffee pot. She had been meaning to drop by the tech lab and talk to jaal, he had sent her an email that morning, wanted to talk to her about something. She remembered the email from the previous night, and quietly hoped that it wouldn't come up.    
She entered the tech lab, looking down at her data pad. "Hey, Jaal. You said you needed to talk?"    
   
Jaal was working on something, he glanced up as she entered, smiling. "Ah, Pathfinder...yes. I received a report from Evfra... it seems you successfully earned his trust. No easy feat."    
   
Sara snorted, setting her data pad down and leaning against the table. "I still don't think he likes me." Jaal shrugged, standing and wiping the grease off his hands. "That's... just his way. I was reading over the report last night..." He paused, a nervous flutter taking root in her stomach. Relief flooded her veins when he continued, but his gaze lingered on her... a bit longer than usual.    
   
"Your biggest problem right now is the Roekaar."    
   
Sara nodded, she recalled Evfra saying something about them the last time she was on Aya. "Evfra made it seem like you had history with them."    
Jaal gave a half shrug. "I know their leader. Akksul... he hates aliens, and the arrival of your people has bolstered his ranks." He sighed, shaking his head. "if Heleus is to be your home then they must be dealt with. Sooner rather than later, I'm afraid." Sara nodded slowly.    
   
"how do you know him?"    
   
Jaal shook his head again, staring at the wall. "He was one of the moshaes students, when I was under her instruction we were paired together. We didn’t get along."  Sara tilted her head, her eyebrows draw together. "So he knows about remnant?"    
Jaal nodded, seeming sad for a moment. "...He used to. He was captured by Kett and spent three years in a forced labor camp before he escaped."    
   
Yikes. Sara raised her eyebrows, folding her arms. "That explains his hatred of aliens... but if he wanted to fight why didn’t he join the resistance?"  Jaal scoffed. "Akksul is not the type to take orders."     
Sara sighed, glancing at him. "I see... and there's no peaceful option here?" He shook his head, a different sort of intensity to his gaze, concern in his voice.    
   
"You could try, but it would not end well. He will make you want to kill him."    
   
Sara rubbed at her temples, the roekaar would only do more harm to the initiative than good... they needed to be dealt with. "Then we should deal with them." Jaal nodded.    
   
"there is a recluse on Havarl, her name is Thaldyr. She escaped with Akksul, it will take some convincing but she may help us."    
   
Sara gave a curt nod, standing up straight. "Alright then. We're heading to Havarl anyway, well swing by and see what we can do."  Jaal nodded, obviously relieved. "thank you, Sara."    
   
Sara smiled. "Whatever you need, Jaal."  she waved goodbye as she left, the few crew mates in the vidcom room still arguing. Sara passed Drack as she headed to the cockpit, he was sitting on the floor by the doors, staring at the broken coffee machine.    
Sara glanced down at him, chuckling softly. "Ever find out who broke it?"    
   
Drack sighed, staring at the machine. "I broke it. It burned my hand so I punched it. It's just funny to watch them bicker."    
   
Sara snorted, shaking her head as she entered the cockpit. The Tempest was entering Havarls atmosphere, Sara walked into the armory and began suiting up. "SAM, tell Vetra and Jaal to suit up and meet me on the ramp."    
   
"Done, Pathfinder."    
   
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   
   
   
_"oh my— You're in love with her."_  
   
A soft gasp from the hologram made Jaal roll his eyes. _"Well, now I have to meet her. When are you going to visit? It has been too long, your siblings and i miss you."_    
   
"Mother please. " Jaal sighed. "We have a lot to do..." Sahuna tilted her head, frowning.   
   
  _"Something is troubling you."_  
   
Jaal pressed his lips into a thin line, shaking his head. "we've found the archon's ship, and another of her people's arks."    
   
_"That should be good news, should it not?"_  
   
Jaal shrugged, rubbing the back of his neck. After they returned from havarl, he was busy with trying to set up a meeting between the Moshae and Akksul, since the meeting with Thaldyr proved to be unhelpful, he spent most of the time trying to convince the Moshae that this was necessary.    
Gil had finished decrypting that kett transponder, and then within a few hours they had found the archons ship. Jaal wanted to go with her but she had insisted he stay focused on the Akksul situation, which he agreed was best, but it didn't stop his worry from escalating the moment she left the ship.    
   
        He would be less nervous if he was with her. She had told him she would be fine, when he expressed his worry. She had Drack and Vetra with her, everything would be fine. They would come back with the map to Meridian, and the salarian ark too. Jaal Sighed, shaking his head. "She left the ship an hour ago, and we have heard nothing since. I would feel better if I were with her... anything could happen to her. You've seen what the Kett do... the archon..."    
   
His mother shook her head, waving her hand. _"now, there will be no talk of that. You have to believe that she will be alright without you. By the rumors I've heard, she'll do just fine."_ Her voice softened, the image flickering. _"Jaal. She'll be fine."_  
   
The ship lurched, and Jaal vaguely heard Sara's voice over the comms. He stood up abruptly, fear spiking in his veins. "I hope you're right mother. I'll call you back later."    
   
Sahuna nodded, no doubt having heard the ruckus. _"Stay strong and Clear, my son."_  
   
the video disconnected and Jaal practically ran out of the tech lab, his heart stuttered as he saw Sara, still in her armor in the vidcom room. She was talking to a salarian he didn’t recognize and Drack, words were exchanged and the salarian left. Drack patted her shoulder, said something and then left. She let her shoulders slump, her hands coming up to cover her face. His eyes widened, worry taking a death grip on his heart. He saw the slight shake of her hands, her shoulders trembling.    
   
She straightened, dragging her hands up through her hair, and walked down from the vidcom room and through the doors. He watched her leave, a million questions racing through his mind. Vetra came up beside him silently, her arms folded. Jaal's voice was soft as he spoke, barely a whisper. "What happened?"    
   
Vetra shook her head, her mandibles clicking anxiously. "That Archon bastard... caught us in some kind of... immobilization field." She paused, as if she wasn't sure what to say next. "He did something to her, stuck her with some kind of needle... the only way we could get out was.. Well was to die I guess... the field only held living matter."    
   
Jaal felt his gut twist, his gaze flickering to the turian. "what. Happened."     
   
Vetra shook her head again, her voice sounding heavy. "She... she died... SAM brought her back but..." Vetra sighed, shrugging her shoulders. "It's been a long day for all of us. We're headed back to the Nexus... I'm going to get some sleep." She patted his shoulder as she left, and then he was alone.    
   
She died... she died.    
   
He turned, heading back into the tech lab, immediately reaching for his tools. He had to be doing something, anything else. He zoned out, a thousand scenarios running through his head while his hands tinkered. What if she hadn't come back? What if...    
He wasn't sure how long he sat there, easing his worry with wrenches and bolts, but the sound of the tech lab doors sliding open jerked him out of his thoughts. He turned in his chair, his breath catching in his throat as he saw her.    
   
She looked... well, she looked like shit.    
   
Her eyes were puffy and red, and her hair was a mess, falling over one of her shoulders in knots and tangles, light reflecting off the wet trails down her cheeks. She looked like she was about to break down in tears.    
Jaal stood then, abandoning whatever it was he was working on. He hesitated, unsure about what exactly he could do, and then she spoke; her voice uneven, heavy with emotion and sounding so... vulnerable.    
   
"Can... can we just..." She hiccuped softly, wrapping her arms around herself. "I need... someone... I d-don't want to be alone."  she looked down at the floor, almost glaring at it, like she was angry for showing emotion, expecting to be turned away.    
He walked over to the makeshift cot he set up for when he stayed u too late and was too tired to make the trip down to the crews quarters. He sat down and held his arms open to her. "You don't have to be alone Sara."    
   
She moved, quiet and unsure, her bare feet quiet against the metal floors. She crawled onto the cot, curling up beside him, her knees tucked to her chest. He wrapped his arms around her, resting his chin on her head. "I heard what happened... do you want to talk about it...?"    
Her small frame trembled against him as she shook her head, one of her hands gripping his arm like a lifeline. "I... I died... and... I—" the words died in her throat, her hands shaking. Jaal nodded, rubbing her back gently.    
"you don’t need to talk about it if you don’t want to." She nodded, balling her fist in the fabric of his rofjiin. Her voice was timid and soft when she spoke again.    
   
"Can... I stay? At least until we reach the nexus..."     
   
Jaal nodded, no hesitation. "Of course... whatever you need, darling one."  Sara looked up at him, tears running down her face, her voice cracking. "Thank you..." She turned her face back down, trying to steady her breathing. "can.. Can we talk about something else? I don't like the silence."    
   
Jaal nodded, grabbing the blanket at the foot of the cot and draping it over her, he was almost certain that her legs were freezing, as he kept the tech lab a bit colder than the rest of the tempest and she was wearing shorts. "I spoke to my mother."    
   
Sara nodded, curling closer to him. "Yeah? She doin' okay?"  He nodded again, returning to rubbing her back; it seemed to calm her down. "She... is interested in meeting you. She has heard many rumors in the resistance. I doubt that there are few members of my family who don’t want to meet you."  Sara gave a half laugh, her fingers absently tracing the freckles on his hand.    
   
"I'd probably make a fool of myself in front of them... it's good that you have them. Family is important, and... I know how hard it is to be away from them."  She swallowed hard, squeezing his hand softly. "you can visit them whenever you want to, just give me the word..." Jaal smiled slightly, the hand on her back stilling for a moment. "that means a lot... thank you. you should sleep, you've had quite the day."    
    
She nodded, her breathing evening out. "Yeah… yeah you're right…" she swallowed hard, her grip on him tightening. "Don't let me go… okay…?" he nodded, laying down with her tucked against his chest.    
    
Sara couldn't shut her eyes yet, the flashes of memories still vividly ingrained behind her eyelids. She had nearly lost it when she arrived back on the tempest, saying a few words before she broke down in her quarters; barely making it out of her armor before she collapsed on the floor, sobbing into her hands, her heart thumping painfully in her chest.    
    
She was so cold… so… empty. SAM had managed to calm her down but it didn’t last, she had felt her heart stop, and then… it's over.   
    
You live, you die… and after… there was nothing. No light to guide you to the other side… no… nothing. Just… emptiness. There was nothing but a vast, unending void when you died, and there was no comfort in that. When you die you're gone.    
    
But she wasn't dead, not anymore. and maybe that was the worst part. She died twice, now. Shouldn't that have been some kind of sign or something? That she wasn't supposed to live? Yet everytime, she had come back. There was something comforting about this moment... She laid there, listening to Jaal's heartbeat, matching the rhythm of her own. She looked up at him, his gaze settled on staring at the wall behind her. He glanced down at her, giving her a half smile. Her heart did a little flip, tears pricking the corners of her eyes. "Jaal...?"    
He held her gaze, only breaking when she reached out and took his hand in hers, blue eyes flickering back to hers. "yes?"    
   
She moved slightly, pressing a soft kiss to the corner of his lips. His cheeks flushed with a soft purple color, his eyes widening in surprised. She smiled at him, tucking her head against his chest, finally shutting her eyes. "Thank you for this..."    
   
Jaal stared for a moment, letting out a soft breath he hadn't realised he was holding. He didn't move until he felt her breathing deepen, and even then he didn't want to risk waking her.    
   
"She is in a deep sleep. I estimate you could carry her back to her quarters without trouble." SAM said quietly.    
   
Jaal shook his head, arms wrapping around her carefully. "No... this is fine. She needs to rest. Thank you SAM."    
   
The AI paused, before speaking again. "For... what?"    
   
Jaal looked down at her, his heart swelling with adoration. He swallowed hard, whispering. "For bringing her back to me." He shut his eyes, taking a deep breath and drifting off.


	18. Reflections

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sara does a lot of running around, and Scott wakes up.

Sara woke up before Jaal did. For a moment she was startled, wasn't quite sure where she was, but the weight of his arms pressed softly against her back kept her grounded. She smiled slightly and laid there for a moment, memorizing all the freckles on his cheeks, the different blotches of color that decorated his skin. She could almost forget about her responsibilities, and was half tempted to fall back asleep.    
   
"Pathfinder, there are several matters that require your attention, and your mailbox is getting full."    
   
SAM's voice sounded over their private channel, his audio output on a volume akin to whispering, which Sara was thankful for because anything louder would have probably startled her. With a sigh she begrudgingly began to move.    
   
She quietly moved off the cot, careful not to wake the angara beside her, and wrote a quick note to him before she slipped out of the tech lab. Luckily no one was in the research room.   
   
Sara could hear the showers running, and by the time she suspected it was either Cora or Vetra, those two tended to get up early enough to avoid the morning shower rush. Quietly making her way down the ladder to deck 2, she entered the code to her quarters and stepped inside.    
   
A soft gush of cool air greeted her as she walked into her room, she must have adjusted the temperature the night before. Her room was a wreck and she probably needed to do laundry. Setting her hands on her hips, she got to cleaning.    
   
It didn't take long; tossing her clothes down the laundry chute, making her bed, tidying up her desk, straightening the sofas, flipping the cushions over, wiping down the table, anything that looked astray was taken care of.    
She supposed it was a coping mechanism of sorts. When mom died she spent all of her time cleaning or doing something with her hands to keep herself busy. The house was never in disarray, except for Alec's room and study. She knew her father hated other people messing with his things, and his room was mom's room too... she was like that for a while, at least until the sadness turned into anger and she left home.    
   
Sara shook her head, folding her arms across her chest tightly, like a reassuring hug. She glanced down at the floor, everything that led to this moment crossing her mind... it wasn't all bad; running back and forth for Liam's movie night was tiresome sometimes, and she had yet to see it come together yet, but it was something to look forward to. Cora had a lead on the Asari ark, and they found survivors from Ark Natanus the last time they were on Havarl; which she should probably check up on, Avitus' last lead had sent her to Elaaden where they found some jettisoned stasis pods but sara hadn't heard anything after that.   
She had been able to help her squadmates too, Vetra got into a little bit of a mess with her sister and they took care of it, With Drack's help they successfully allied with the Krogan of New Tuchanka and kicked that dirtbag Spender off the Nexus; a new outpost would be established on Elaaden within a few days time. They rescued the Salarian ark and saved Drack's scouts, but at the expense of Pathfinder Raeka, and still they got the map of Meridian.    
   
 Things were looking great... yet all Sara could feel was this sense of dread. Like all of this was just a drawing in the sand, sitting just out of reach of the impending tide. She settled her hand on her chest, feeling her heartbeat beneath her skin. She sighed softly, sitting down at her desk and just... listened.    
   
The beating of her heart was comforting, like a steady drumbeat. She forced herself to breathe, just breathe, in through the nose and out the mouth. Telling herself She could do this, she was strong enough. When this is over, it will all be worth the lives they lost.    
   
"Alec would be proud."    
   
Sara opened her eyes, turning in her chair to look at SAM's modem. "You think...?"  If SAM had a body, she imagined he would nod.    
   
"I do. You have taken a different path, but the results remain the same. You have begun building a home for your people, Sara. You are a Pathfinder."    
   
Sara smiled slightly, still keeping her hand over her heart. "yeah... I guess I am." She sighed, leaning back in her chair. "You think when all this is done... we'll be able to just... be normal? Not that anything I've ever done is normal but... ya know..." She trailed off, her gaze flickering back to SAM's router. The AI was quiet for a moment, speaking after a small pause.    
   
"I think that eventually these unusual situations you seem to find yourself in will feel normal, though I doubt the initiative would allow the pathfinder a day off."    
   
Sara snorted, nodding in agreement. "You're probably right..." She paused, a new thought coming to mind. Her voice was quieter as she spoke, almost timid. "D'you think... I could start a family?"    
   
Silence filled the room, and Sara almost regretted asking. She stayed quiet though, still wanting an answer. SAM spoke after a pregnant pause, his voice words sounding carefully chosen.    
   
"Do you intend to do so with Jaal?"    
   
Sara sat up a little straighter, looking down at her shirt, her hand fiddling with the fabric; a nervous tick. She cleared her throat, shifting in her seat. "I... I don't know yet. I've been so scared of a relationship that now that I've potentially started one, I'm... at a loss I suppose."    
The blue light of the router flickered as SAM spoke, the audio output a bit lower than before.    
   
"I have been meaning to ask about your romantic attachment. My experience with such things was a long established relationship; cherished, familiar, but tragic."    
   
Sara nodded, a painful ache returning to her heart. "Mom and dad."  SAM continued.    
   
"I have never known the beginning of an attachment... and your previous one was quite painful."    
   
Sara nodded, folding her arms. "I'm not sure what to tell you... it's... not something I can explain in depth. He's very open with how he feels, he's told me that he likes me, and I like him a lot too. But there's always this fear I have that... that it won't last."    
   
"You fear he will die, or be taken from you in some other way... Like Michael."    
   
Sara nodded, forcing down the lump in her throat, her voice sounding strained. "Yeah."    
   
SAM spoke gently, his voice soft. "What do you intend to do?"    
   
Sara looked up at his router, smiling sadly. "Michael wouldn't want me to cry over him forever. I'm in another galaxy for gods sake... and before mom died she told us something. 'Fall in love, at least once.' I cared about Michael a lot but... I don't think I cared about him the way I care about Jaal. So, I'm going to take my mother's advice and see where this goes."  she paused, feeling a bit more confident.  "Living apart from someone you love because you are scared to lose them is no way to live."    
   
"You are wiser than you think you are, Sara." SAM said, almost sounding smug.    
   
She smiled, shaking her head. "Yeah, well, don't say that too loud. People might actually start taking me seriously." She stood up from her chair and walked over to her wardrobe, feeling better than she had since she died.    
   
"That was sarcasm."    
   
She laughed softly, taking out a set of clothes and grabbing a towel from the shelf beside her closet. "Very good, SAM! See your learning more already, are the showers empty?"   
   
"Yes, though I would hurry if you want to beat Ms. B'Sayle to the hot water first, I detect that she is awake and heading to the showers."    
   
Sara quickly grabbed the towel, slipped out of her room and into the bathrooms just as she saw peebee slide down the stairs. She snickered as she heard Peebee groan from outside the doors.    
   
"You better hurry up Ryder! And don’t take all the hot water!!"    
   
Sara rolled her eyes, it almost felt like she was home again, racing Scott to see who could get the shower first. "Will do Peebee."     
To Save Peebee from an ice cold shower, she input one of the codes Kallo had given her for the water, turning on the water and letting it warm up as she stripped down. She took her time, relaxing as the water washed over her, it was short lived though; as SAM informed her that drack and Gil were also waiting to use the showers. She finished up quickly and dried off, grabbing a robe from the cupboard and wrapping it around herself before she exited.    
   
 She dressed herself in a simple shirt and pants, tossing on her bomber jacket over it. She began humming softly as she braided her damp hair hair, glancing in the mirror to glare at the dark circles under her eyes. She shook her head and dabbed a bit of makeup under her eyes, trying to make an effort to look at least half alive.     
She should probably look at least a little presentable when she meets with director tann... a ping from her email terminal alerted her to a new email, and she opened it from her omni-tool. It was from Jaal.    
   
Her eyes scanned the page quickly; it was about akksul. The Moshae had convinced him to come to aya for a meeting, whether the Roekaar leader was aware of Sara's invitation was unbeknownst to her.    
   
"Hey, SAM, ask Kallo how far are we from the Nexus? We need to take a detour to Aya."    
   
"I will notify our pilot at once Pathfinder."    
   
Sara nodded. "Thanks SAM. That's all for now."  she left her room with a lighter feeling in her chest. Liam had something he wanted her to sign off on, something about diplomacy or something for him and Jaal to work on. Which was weird because Liam wasn't the best diplomat she knew. His idea of diplomacy was a game of poker or conversations over drinks, which wasn't a bad thing necessarily, but probably not the best route when negotiating outposts or alliances. But whatever her crew was doing to get along was fine by her.    
   
Making her way to deck 3, and taking the lift down to Liams room. As she waited for the doors to open, she looked down at her omnitool; He even filled out a form and everything for whatever this was. She signed off on it with a swipe of her finger as the doors finally opened.  "Hey Liam I signed off on that—" she finally looked up, her eyes brows drawing together.  "Project."     
   
Liam was working over... some kind of armor on the table behind his couch, and also happened to be shirtless. It wasn't really a big deal, she had seen plenty of shirtless guys in her life. Liam looked up, placing his tool on the table. "that's great Pathfinder, "  Sara heard footsteps behind her but before she could turn Liam was talking again.    
   
"Jaal ama darav! we got our gear."    
   
Whatever Sara was expecting, nothing could have prepared her to see Jaal walk past her naked. Her eyes widened, eyebrows shooting up, and despite her attempts to look away got an eyeful of his ass. If she thought it looked good in armor... she averted her gaze, clearing her throat and hoping they couldn't tell her cheeks were burning. Folding her arms acrss her chest , she forced herself to speak, ignoring the temptation to stare. "We don't technically have uniforms, but this is a little too casual."    
   
Liam chuckled, a hint of a smirk playing on his features. "Just convenience, swapping armor." He turned back to Jaal. "Ready?"    
Jaal nodded. "Go."    
   
Sara forced herself into a neutral expression as she watched, curious about more than just the armor swap.    
   
"Right, the pattern on your pauldron?"     
   
"Family honorific."    
   
"Can I wear the poncho?"    
   
Sara frowned, she had heard a few angara discussing the cape like things back on aya, they were supposed to be a gift from a loved one, she couldn't remember the exact name for them though. Where exactly was this going?   
   
"It's a Rofjinn, and no."    
   
That's the word, Sara mused.    
   
"why? Is it religious?"   
   
"It's personal. You're not allowed."    
   
" Wait, what—" Sara tried to interject, but was obviously ignored.    
   
"Because of status— or species?"    
   
"Maybe it's both."    
   
"Do all humans look alike?"    
   
"Some of you sound alike."    
   
Sara winced, rubbing at her temples. This fucking crew... "Okay, Hold up. Park it for a sec."    
   
the two of them looked up at her, like this was a casual conversation or something. Sara shook her head, gesturing to the armor on the table. "you said this was about armor, are you deliberately trying to offend Jaal?"    
   
Jaal nodded, shrugging his shoulder. "Of course he is?"    
   
Sara glanced at him, and then back to Liam for an explanation. Liam sighed, gesturing to the table and then to jaal. "That's the point. Asking stuff the diplomats leave out; Armor for answers."    
Jaal nodded, adding on to Liams explanation. "My turn was earlier. Nexus info packets leave a lot out."    
Jaal glanced at Liam, tilting his head, looking smug. "I'm sorry— was this not sanctioned?"    
   
Liam scowled, grumbling at him. "You weaseling adhi..."    
   
Jaal shrugged, walking around Liam. "Nevertheless. Ryder." He said, walking past her and out of liam's room. Sara glanced back as he left, biting the inside of her lip in a way she hoped looked irritated. She looked back at Liam, shaking her head. "You know that technically Jaal is an emissary, and that this would be pretty hard to explain to Evfra. Mind you, I would be the one doing the explaining as your commanding officer."    
Liam sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. At least he looked a little bit guilty. "He won't tattle if that's what you're worried about. We were joking around and realized we didn't know how to insult each other, or how not to. Some things are so ingrained they're invisible, we didn't even know the warning signs. So we just got it over with. Now we won't do it accidentally, like when negotiating an outpost." Liam folded his arms, shaking his head. "Enough of his people want to shoot us."    
    
Sara shook her head, it was hard to get mad when there were good intentions. "I get it, no harm no foul."    
   
Liam chuckled. "If Jaal were offended I'd be on the floor, I'd take that kind of honest any day. We're here to learn, that’s what our team is for. Better now than when lives are on the line."  Sara nodded, rolling her eyes. "Yes, fine, but can we keep the nudity to a minimum please?"    
   
Liam smirked, raising an eyebrow. "hm. Yeah I guess, since you lit up like a christmas tree once jaal walked in I'd say that's fair."     
   
Anything Sara might've said died in her throat, so she opted to glare at him. Liam held up his hands in surrender, laughing. "don't worry Pathfinder, we all know about your little crush."    
   
Sara felt her cheeks begin to heat up again, sputtering over her words, fidgeting with her hands nervously. "what— I don't— did peebee—" Liam finished her sentence, nodding.    
   
"Yeah, spilled everything when we were talking earlier. Kinda surprised she remembered really, she was hammered."    
Sara groaned, this was embarrassing. "I hoped she would have forgot..." Liam shrugged. "Nah. Anyway, on that note... are you two serious? I saw you go into the tech lab last night."    
   
Sara faltered at that, opening her mouth to speak and then shutting it again. She was a wreck last night, and needed someone to tell her she was okay, that she was alive, because for a while she didn't believe it. But Liam didn't need to know that.  She shrugged, wrapping her arms around herself, her voice coming off more curt than she intended. "I dunno. I'll get back to you on that."    
   
Liam frowned, rubbing a hand over his face. "Ah shit, I hit a nerve. I'm sorry Ryder I didn't—"    
   
Sara cut him off, shaking her head quickly. "No, no its okay Liam I just wasn't in the best place yesterday. You don’t just die and come back the same... you know?" He sighed, nodding. "Yeah. I get that..."  he cleared his throat, changing the subject, to Sara's relief.    
"So, Kallo said something earlier about a change of plans, where are we headed?"    
   
Sara let herself relax a little bit, she was among friends on the tempest, she didn't need to be so jaded. "Aya, I've got some stuff I gotta do before we get to the nexus."     
   
Liam clapped his hands together, looking excited. "Oh, that's perfect yeah? I was gonna ask you earlier but then we attacked the archons ship and it just didn't seem like a good time, but you could use a break, so if we have time, you wanna explore the market? I've got some things I could use your specs on."    
Sara shrugged, the idea of a day on aya sounded nice, and Liam was pleasant company. "Sure, I'll stop by if I have time."    
   
Liam grinned, making finger guns at her. "Great, looking forward to it Pathfinder." Sara chuckled softly, waving as she turned to leave. "See you later Liam."    
   
She shook her head as she left, making her way to Deck 2, passing by Gil who was applying a new paint job to the nomad, talking to Vetra who was sitting beside him, holding the picture of what the paint job should look like.    
   
"Did I just see Jaal walk through here, butt-naked?"    
   
Vetra sighed. "Yeah, something about armor swapping with Liam or something."    
   
Sara stifled her laugh as Kallo spoke over the comms, signaling their arrival at Aya. She made her way to the cockpit, more serious matters taking place in her mind.    
   
She had to deal with Akksul now.    
   
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   
   
By the time Sara had finally reached the nexus she was exhausted. No doubt tann was still expecting her arrival at Ops center, but she needed a minute to breathe; she had a long day.   
   
She had met with the moshae and Akksul which went about as well as she expected. It did do shit to help the situation, and Jaal was right. She did want to kill Akksul. After she was done talking with them, Suvi called to tell her that there was an emergency call from Eos waiting for her. Sara hurried to the Tempest, it would be a blow if the nexus lost this outpost, and even worse for the colonists. She didn't hesitate to take the tempest straight to Eos after hearing it, vauge as it may have been. Upon her arrival Bradley explained the situation, and Jaal confirmed his suspicions. He had seen some kind of attack as a possible outcome when dealing with the Roekaar but even he agreed that attack Prodromos would be bold.    
   
So they headed to Blackrock Tande, Sara's anger steeping inside her, eventually reaching a boiling point. Who the fuck did this guy think he was? Trying to attack people who were trying to start their lives? In her eyes, Akksul was no better than the Kett.   
   
She spared no mercy dealing with the Roekaar scouts at the camp they found, each bullet she fired hitting her target, fueling her anger into each and every shot. Once they were clear, they started tossing the camp, looking for anything that may point to what the hell they were planning.    
   
After discovering the Roekaar beacon, and the plans to attack prodromos, Sara devised a plan. Take the beacon to Site 2 and lead the incoming hostiles right into a trap.    
   
It worked, and best of all it made Akksul angry, which made Sara feel a little bit better. Bradley took it a step further by overloading the beacons signal and diverting reinforcements to site 1, where Sara and her team finished off the Roekaar attackers. Akksul left Eos scorned, but Jaal warned this may only make him more dangerous.    
   
It was a risk Sara could live with, knowing her people were safe lessened the burden on her heart and she was able to leave Eos in good spirits, confident that they were safe to live another day.    
   
When She arrived back aboard the tempest, Cora informed her that the transponder they recovered from the wreck of the Periphona yielded results, and within the next few hours Sara had the Asari ark back on route to the Nexus; albeit badly damaged, and with a rookie pathfinder at it's helm, but intact nonetheless.    
Sara got back in contact with Avitus, who relayed troubling news to her; he had received a set of coordinates from his SAM implant that he believed was coming from Macen. It was the only lead they had so far after poking around the stasis pods on Elaaden, while Sara was doubtful that the Turian Pathfinder was alive she did not speak her thoughts aloud, and took to the skies right away to meet Avitus at the coordinates.    
   
It was a mess, and the Turian Ark was in no shape to fly, so they had to leave it. As Sara had suspected, Macen had died. He tried to transfer his SAM to avitus but died before it was completed, leaving the turian arks SAM in a traumatic state. With help from the Nexus they retrieved the fractured SAM node, after Sara helped settle the doubts Avitus had about assuming the role as pathfinder, and finally headed back to the Zheng He system. It seemed like now, everything was falling into place and all Sara had to do was step up and push the last piece of the puzzle together; Meridian.    
   
With a heavy sigh, She departed the Tempest and headed to Ops center.    
   
She took her time walking to Director Tanns office, and once she entered, was not at all surprised that they were arguing. Tann's secretary looked at her sympathetically. "They're waiting for you. careful..."    
Sara sighed, making her way up the steps as more of the conversation reached her ears.    
   
"… She looked at the krogan, and thought of you."    
   
"Just admit it, you don’t like the krogan. We all know it."    
   
Addison was the first to see her come in, clearing her throat pointedly, easing all arguing. "The Pathfinder."    
   
Tann straightened, seeming more sour than usual, no doubt upset over her choices on the archons ship. "Ryder, we were just discussing you latest mission."    
   
Sara resisted the urge to turn around and walk back out the door, steeling herself. "There was no time to save both, I had to make a decision, and I stand by it."    
Tann sniffed, but didn't seem to want to discuss it further. "Yes. So it would seem, " he sighed, folding his hands behind his back. " it is a victory nonetheless."    
   
Kandros spoke up, stepping forward. Sara could almost feel the tension rise as he spoke. "Yet I have to question what we gained, provoking the archon like this?"    
   
Sara stifled her sigh, walking around to the tables hologram controls and pulling up the data they extracted from the artifact. "What we gained was a map to meridian, and a short window to get there, its the control center for the terraforming network." She expanded the image of the large remnant site, trying to sound less tired than she felt. "we turn it on, and we can return the planets in this cluster to the golden worlds they once were."    
   
The leaders gathered around the table, Tann speaking from his position at the end. "Based on what data? This is all alien science."    
Sara was starting to get tired of explaining herself over and over again, hiding her irritation as she spoke, keeping her voice level and calm. "Aya's vault suggests meridian is the key."    
   
Kandros shook his head, his mandibles flaring as he spoke. "While I appreciate what you've done for our strike teams, we're not equipped for a war with the kett. They'll be defending meridian with all they've got."    
   
At this point, Sara had the feeling they were just making excuses, how could they not jump at the chance to fix this entire shit show? To give thousands of people the lives that they left their homes for?  Sara narrowed her eyes, her irritation breaking through as she spoke.   
   
 "a fight is coming, whether we're prepared or not. If we do nothing we only make for easier targets, you haven't—" she let out an exasperated sigh. "The archon is already studying how to exalt us. None of you saw what I've seen, this is going to be bloody and the only way we can avoid a mass of casualties is to get ahead of this before the figure out how."    
   
Addison spoke then, furthering Sara's disbelief. "Still, it's better to focus on the outposts, that way if the kett attack we won't all be in one place."    
   
Sara folded her arms, her irritation turning to anger, but Kesh spoke before she could.    
   
"Then there's this SAM of yours. We took a chance letting AI get involved. Frankly I'm uncomfortable with just how involved it's become." The krogan sighed, shaking her head. "I appreciate what you did for my people, but I can't support your plan, Ryder."    
Sara was damn near infuriated now, if they didn't do this, eveything she's built would be for nothing and all the lives she's saved would be thrown away.    
   
"Then I will."    
   
Sara turned her head to see Captain Hayjer walk up the stairs, followed by Avitus and Vaderia. 

 "I will too." Avitus said, coming to stand beside hayjer. 

"So will I." Vaderia echoed, her arms folded and voice sounding confident. Sara felt her anger simmer down slightly, at least she wasn't alone.    
   
Tann stepped forward with a confident sort of swagger that assumed his word was final. "I applaud the gesture, but you answer to me, I hope you understand."    
   
Sara glared at Tann, her anger leeching out as she stepped forward. Kesh's eyes widened, and Sara wondered if she thought she was going to punch him. Instead she kept her hard gaze locked on the salarian, keeping her voice carefully devoid of emotion. "I hear you, loud and clear."    
   
Tann didn’t seem to notice her ire, or if he did he ignored it. "Good. That is all."    
   
Sara turned her back and walked down the steps, followed by the other three pathfinders. "Well, I guess we need a plan B then."    
Hayjer nodded, and gestured to the other two pathfinders. "We may have an idea."     
   
Before Hayjer could continue Tann's secretary interrupted them. "Pathfinder Ryder, apologies, but there was an urgent message for you— they said your brother is awake."   
   
Any anger Sara may have had still bubbling inside her diffused, replaced by a confused sort of disbelief. Her voice cracked as she spoke, eyes widening. "What?"     
Hayjer ushered her towards the door. "Go, we can talk later, in the tech lab."    
   
Sara didn’t need to be told twice, she ran to the tram, inputting the code for the Hyperion Cryo bay with shaking hands, a sick feeling twisting in her gut. Now was the moment of truth, she hadn't talked to him when she could have, and Scott would no doubt be furious with her. She had been a coward and now it was time to face the music.    
   
She stepped off the tram on unsteady legs, folding her arms to hide her shaking hands and walking through the doors to the cryo bay.    
   
Her eyes immediately found him, sitting up in the hospital bed talking with Harry. She faltered when he looked at her; he didn't look happy. She walked over to them, thankful that her voice came out even as she spoke. "You're upset."    
   
Scott scoffed, shaking his head and looking away from her, the hurt apparent on his features. "Well, you didn't stop by. They found a way to connect my implant. We could have talked."    
   
his voice was curt and sharp and it hurt, he had every reason to be angry but she just didn’t... she didn't expect it to feel this bad, like she had done something unforgivable to the only person who loved her no matter what. Harry cut in then, he didn’t want to tell Scott that she was there but was too terrified to talk to him. "Hold on just a sec there, your sisters been busy—"    
   
Scott looked up at her, his voice seething with anger and probably sadness too. "Too busy to tell me dad was dead?" Sara shook her head, looking down at the floor as Scott continued, his vice breaking at the end. "Too busy to check up on family?"    
   
Sara felt the lump welling up in her throat, tears stinging at her eyes, but she willed herself to look at him, reminding herself that he didn't know... he couldn't understand how much she had been hurt because she was too busy running from her problems. She didn't try to comfort him, no, she knew better than that.    
   
"I'm sorry."    
   
Her brother scoffed and she shrugged her shoulders, looking away as the tears spilled down her face, throwing her hands up in defeat.   
   
 "I don't know what you want me to say, Scott! I couldn’t decide which was worse, telling you dad died or having to explain the fact that he's dead because he chose my life over his, or that he left me with this giant mess to fix and I don’t know what I'm doing! Call me a coward if you want to but I couldn’t do that, I couldn't be the one to tell you that this shit had gone to hell and we are all that's left of our family."  

She wiped away her tears as she finished speaking, somewhere in her rant harry had left them alone, and Sara was honestly tempted to leave to let Scott cool down.    
   
Her brother sighed and grabbed her hand, pulling her down to sit beside him. "I know, Sara. You aren't good with these things I just... I thought maybe you trusted me a bit more to be able to tell me, you know? I bet you saw some relic or something that had a map that led to treasure and you were like 'Scott who?' "  Sara sniffed, laughing softly and covering her face with her hands.    
   
"No, it was more like 'Scott sleeps till lunch most days... I'll fill him in later.'"    
   
Scott snorted, rolling his eyes. "So that's how we're going to play it." He sighed, running a hand through his hair. "It's down to us now... first mom, now dad..."    
   
Sara nodded, lifting her face from her hands. "I'm not gonna lose you too. We're all we have now."    
Scott nodded solemnly, before turning to look at her. "So... you really are the pathfinder now?"  Sara sighed, nodding. "Yeah. It was dad's idea. Or rather, dad did it without asking anyone and we kinda just went with it."    
   
Scott shrugged. "Sounds like him, as soon as I get my gear we'll—" he started to get up but stumbled and  Sara barely caught him before Harry was at his side.  "No way are you fit for duty sir, you need a chance to mend. "    
   
Scott glared up at him, that trademark Ryder sass kicking in. "Yeah? Says who?" 

Sara glared at him, sitting him back down on the cot.  

"The Pathfinder that's who. You need to rest up— that's an order, specialist Ryder. I want you at your best when you join the crew again, not stumbling around like grandpa when he's had too much whiskey."    
   
Scott laid back down without too much hassle, yawning. "Pulling rank on me already? You better hope I never tell anyone about that year you only ate paste."  Sara cringed a little bit shaking her head, making her brother laugh. 

"Was it first grade? or second?"  

Harry looked back at her, shaking his head. "You can keep talking if you'd like, just no arm wrestling."  Scott rolled his eyes as Harry walked away.    
   
"there he goes, Dr. Carlyle taking the fun out of everything... well, you better start filling me in sis, I've got plenty of time."    
   
Sara smiled, pulling up a chair, this could take a while. "Alright, well should I talk about my crew first or my growing hatred for director Tann?"    
   
Scott hummed soflty, thinking. "lets hear about your crew, i'll hear all the dirt on Tann later, what's it like? is your ship amazing?"    
   
Sara nodded. "Of course it is, it's mine." She sighed, folding her arms and relaxing back on her chair.   
   
" Well, you know cora, she's still my second in command, Liam is there, I think you know him?"  Scott nodded, waving his hand for her to continue.    
   
"There's Vetra, she's a kickass mercenary slash smuggler. We got Peebee who's kinda like our little  wildcard, and resident remnant expert. Drack is our resident krogan, cranky old man but he can kick some ass, he's good for conversation too. Gil is our mechanic and master of poker, he argues a lot with our pilot Kallo, who is best friends with our liason from the science team here, Suvi. And then theres..."    
She faltered a little bit, how was she going to explain that she... kindof had a boyfriend now? Scott looked up at her expectantly, raising an eyebrow at his sisters expression.    
   
"Don't tell me, he's the hottest hunk of a man you've ever seen and are desperately in lust with him."    
   
Sara glared at him, pursing her lips. "Oh shut up, and no. On one of my first mission's as Pathfinder I made contact with a race of aliens known as the Angara, we are actually allied with them now, as they are helping us fight the kett who want to kill or turn us all into them. He's one of them. His name is Jaal, and yes he is very muscular but that has nothing to do with it."  

Scott looked at her with a deadpanned expression, he could tell when she wasn't telling him something.   
   
 "And?"    
   
Sara sighed, shaking her head. "And we might have something going on between us but I don’t know what it is yet."    
   
Scott stared at her, wide eyed and was speechless for a second. Sara watched his face, looking for any sign of his reaction. He scoffed, shaking his head and propping himself up on his elbow. "Damn Sara! The first thing you do when you meet a new species is hook up with one? Good to know."    
   
Sara slapped his arm, scowling. "It's not like that... I don’t know what we are yet, and I haven't asked... so..."    
   
Scott looked at her expectantly, gesturing with his hands at the door. "Soooo go ask him! And then bring him back with you I want to meet him, I gotta make sure he's good enough for you."  Sara rolled her eyes, sighing.    
"I can bring him by tomorrow..." She looked at her brother, spotting the way his hands trembled as he tried to move. "You really should rest Scott... I'll be back first thing tomorrow."    
   
He yawned again, rubbing at his eyes. "Yeah, alright. But only because you insisted. You better be here when I wake up."    
   
Sara nodded, patting his shoulder as she stood up. "I will. I promise."


End file.
